The Official Forum  

Go Back   The Official Forum > Basketball

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Rate Thread Display Modes
  #1 (permalink)  
Old Sat Feb 16, 2008, 01:25pm
Official Forum Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Maryland
Posts: 891
Coaches....What can you say?

I did 2 girls games this morning. The coach for the 8th grade team, her husband is a varsity coach for a girls team. I did their game Thursday night. This is the first time I have had one of here games since she left high school coaching 2 years ago. We have always gotten along.

Today, I go to her before the game a to break the ice and say " Coach if you are going to complain about my officiating, I am going to complain about your coaching" She jumps on me for calls that I made at her husband's game Thursday night. I called a push on his player in front of his bench. A good call. He complained loudly and several fans did as well. She tells me I called a terrible game and sited several plays, and she says " just as the fans behind the bench, they will tell you" I explained that the fans had no idea of the rules or how to enforce them. She was just angry. BTW, his team won by 42 points and used their subs a lot during the game. It was never close.

I could not believe she would behave like this. She lost this game by 20.

I don't really have a question, but I was thinking why would she want to make me angry at her? They won the game by 42, I had no influence on the game. Why not butter me up for this game? I don't get it. I always wanted the officials on my side before the game.
Reply With Quote
  #2 (permalink)  
Old Sat Feb 16, 2008, 01:39pm
In Memoriam
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Hell
Posts: 20,221
Quote:
Originally Posted by Terrapins Fan
Today, I go to her before the game a to break the ice and say " Coach if you are going to complain about my officiating, I am going to complain about your coaching" She jumps on me for calls that I made at her husband's game Thursday night.

I could not believe she would behave like this.

I don't really have a question, but I was thinking why would she want to make me angry at her? They won the game by 42, I had no influence on the game. Why not butter me up for this game? I don't get it. I always wanted the officials on my side before the game.
Are you serious, Turtle? Do you really expect coaches to butter you up before a game?

NEVER go and schmooze coaches before a game. Or during a game. Or after a game. Sucking around can never lead to anything that will end up being even remotely advantageous from an official's standpoint. As you found out above, it sureashell can lead to confrontation though. If you want to respond to a coach that wants to banter a little bit, fine, but do not ever initiate sessions like that.

You were directly responsible for that confrontation. If you keep away from the coach except for any info that must be passed along, you won't find yourself in situations like that.

Let the conversations come from the coaches...not vice-versa.
Reply With Quote
  #3 (permalink)  
Old Sat Feb 16, 2008, 01:44pm
Official Forum Member
 
Join Date: Aug 1999
Location: In the offseason.
Posts: 11,762
Quote:
Originally Posted by Terrapins Fan
I " Coach if you are going to complain about my officiating, I am going to complain about your coaching"
That is a statement I'd stay well away from....to many explosive possibilities.
__________________
Owner/Developer of RefTown.com
Reply With Quote
  #4 (permalink)  
Old Sat Feb 16, 2008, 02:01pm
Official Forum Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Central Wisconsin
Posts: 1,069
Stay professional when in stripes!

I agree w/ previous responses. Camron's quote of your initial attempt to make small talk explains much of why you had this confrontation and unpleasant game

DO NOT initiate pre-game "banter", even if you think you are familiar acquantences with the coach(es). This does not mean you have to be rude or discourteous, just avoid putting yourself in a position that can (and often times does) become contentious.

Chalk it up to a lesson learned, the hard way.
__________________
"Stay in the game!"
Reply With Quote
  #5 (permalink)  
Old Sat Feb 16, 2008, 02:32pm
Do not give a damn!!
 
Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: On the border
Posts: 28,902
I will also agree that what you said to the coach would not be seen as appropriate in any way, unless you really knew that coach very, very well and they have went out of their way to give you credit for your ability. Other than that, leave those kinds of conversation alone. You are opening yourself (and you did) to the coach to overreact to what you have to say and the conversation might lead to more problems.

Peace
__________________
"When the phone does not ring, the assignor is calling."
--Black

Charles Michael “Mick” Chambers (1947-2010)
Reply With Quote
  #6 (permalink)  
Old Sat Feb 16, 2008, 02:37pm
Esteemed Forum Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 17,834
Hello Coach ....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jurassic Referee
Never go and schmooze coaches before a game. Or during a game. Or after a game. Sucking around can never lead to anything that will end up being even remotely advantageous from an official's standpoint. If you want to respond to a coach that wants to banter a little bit, fine, but do not ever initiate sessions like that. Let the conversations come from the coaches, not vice-versa.
Rookie officials: Please take serious note of Jurassic Referee's comments.

Now's the time of year when we often see more than two head coaches in the gym, coaches scouting teams, getting ready for conference, or state, tournaments. When I see a coach in the gym, and if he's anywhere near me, I simply extend my hand for a handshake, and say, "Hello coach, nice to see you". Period. End of discussion.
Reply With Quote
  #7 (permalink)  
Old Sat Feb 16, 2008, 04:11pm
Official Forum Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Maryland
Posts: 891
I do know her very well. I would say I have done 20 games for her and see her at all of her husbands games and we speak. This was the first time I officiated her game in 2 years.

Live and learn. Remember, I was a coach once also. 8 years as an offical and 11 years as a coach. I talked to all the officials when I coached and I never said a nasty word before the game and rarely ever after a game.

Thanks for the feed back.
Reply With Quote
  #8 (permalink)  
Old Sat Feb 16, 2008, 04:25pm
Official Forum Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: MSN
Posts: 224
Quote:
Originally Posted by Terrapins Fan
I do know her very well. I would say I have done 20 games for her and see her at all of her husbands games and we speak. This was the first time I officiated her game in 2 years.

Live and learn. Remember, I was a coach once also. 8 years as an offical and 11 years as a coach. I talked to all the officials when I coached and I never said a nasty word before the game and rarely ever after a game.
A coach wanting to chat me up before a game is very different than me initiating the conversation (which I don't.)

What she heard: "Hey 'coach', you and your hubby were a%%&&&&s last night. If you're one today -and I expect that you will-, I'll take GREAT satisfaction in T'ing you up and tossing you out!"
Reply With Quote
  #9 (permalink)  
Old Sat Feb 16, 2008, 04:36pm
Esteemed Forum Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 17,834
Morman ????

Quote:
Originally Posted by Terrapins Fan
See her at all of her husbands games.
How many does she have ???
Reply With Quote
  #10 (permalink)  
Old Sat Feb 16, 2008, 04:39pm
9/11 - Never Forget
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Northern Virginia
Posts: 5,641
Send a message via Yahoo to grunewar
Coaches....What can you say? A lot.

Coaches....What should you say? Very little.
__________________
There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.
Reply With Quote
  #11 (permalink)  
Old Sat Feb 16, 2008, 04:56pm
Fav theme: Roundball Rock
 
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Near Dog River (sorta)
Posts: 8,557
You cannot misquote silence.
__________________
Pope Francis
Reply With Quote
  #12 (permalink)  
Old Sat Feb 16, 2008, 08:29pm
Official Forum Member
 
Join Date: Aug 1999
Posts: 1,274
Wink

Quote:
Originally Posted by BillyMac
How many does she have ???
First you spelled the word wrong... it is Mormon,

Second to set the record straight the church banned polygamy in 1896

No difference than over the back, reaching or several other myths debunked on this board
Reply With Quote
  #13 (permalink)  
Old Sat Feb 16, 2008, 08:45pm
Esteemed Forum Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 17,834
"Everything Coming Up Roses"

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kelvin green
First you spelled the word wrong... it is Mormon,
Second to set the record straight the church banned polygamy in 1896
The title of my post referred to the famous Broadway singer, Ethel Morman.



Aren't there still some Mormons that practice polygomy, however with multiple wives and one husband, rather than one wife and multiple husbands, as I was referring to in the post?

I believe that there's a Utahref on the NFHS forum? Maybe he, or one of his wives, can settle this debate?
Reply With Quote
  #14 (permalink)  
Old Sat Feb 16, 2008, 09:21pm
Official Forum Member
 
Join Date: Aug 1999
Posts: 1,274
As previously mentioned the church banned polygamy in 1896.

There are splinter/fundamentalist groups that practice but it is illegal.

The Utah Constitution bans polygamy as well. It is a crimnal offense although not heavily prosecuted unless sex abuse of a minor involved..
Reply With Quote
  #15 (permalink)  
Old Sat Feb 16, 2008, 09:26pm
Esteemed Forum Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 17,834
65 In The Slow Lane ...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kelvin green
As previously mentioned the church banned polygamy in 1896. The Utah Constitution bans polygamy as well. It is a crimnal offense although not heavily prosecuted unless sex abuse of a minor involved.
And it's illegal to travel faster than 65 mph in the State of Connecticut.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Coaches box fonzzy07 Football 20 Thu Sep 28, 2006 11:09am
coaches box phansen Football 19 Sat Sep 09, 2006 07:19pm
Coaches out of coaches area tskill Football 3 Mon Oct 03, 2005 07:21am
NCAA assistant coaches vs. HS assistant coaches Indy_Ref Basketball 7 Sun Apr 18, 2004 03:57pm
Asst. coaches; head coaches Putty Basketball 1 Fri Dec 12, 2003 11:22pm


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 05:09am.



Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.3.0 RC1