What do you say to coaches?

[Art H]

I would like to know what you fellow officials would say to the following comments a high school coach would say to you during a game. These are comments you hear time and time again. I also realize that a coach doesn't always deserve a response but if you were to give him/her one then what would you say?

1. "call it both ways ref"
2. "look at the fouls ref, it's 7 to 1"
3. "he went over his back ref" This is during a rebound with his player in front of the opponent and no call is made.
4. "when are you going to call the 3 secs ref"
5. When you make a blocking call on his player and the coach insists that he was set.
6. "Isn't the hand part of the ball" This would be on a shot attempt.

If anyone can come up with any others that you hear all the time then I would like to hear them.