T Worthy?

[deecee]

Originally Posted by Welpe

We're supposed to be the unemotional arbiters of the game. Just the way it is.

Stating a fact that a game is sloppy isn't emotional.

[Welpe]

Originally Posted by deecee

Stating a fact that a game is sloppy isn't emotional.

You're missing the point. We are held to a higher standard of comportment because we are supposed to be the unemotional arbiters of the game. It's generally more acceptable for some coaches to act the way they do because they have an emotional investment in the outcome.

That doesn't make it right but it's true.

[JRutledge]

"If you keep yelling at me about what I am supposed to do, then you will not be able to stand very long" then walk away. Problem solved or just give the T if you have dealt with the coach earlier.

Usually they get the message. I do not pussy foot with coaches. You want to be big and bad, I can be worse. And I will win in the end.

Peace

[Welpe]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

"If you keep yelling at me about what I am supposed to do, then you will not be able to stand very long" then walk away.

Threatening to break their knee caps would work I suppose.

I kid, I know what you mean and I use a similar warning. It works.

[JRutledge]

Originally Posted by Welpe

Threatening to break their knee caps would work I suppose.

I kid, I know what you mean and I use a similar warning. It works.

I have never been an advocate for not basically threatening a coach or player. Bottom line is that you have to make it real for them. If they want to continue, remind them of what is going to happen. If they do not like it, I probably passed many schools to get to this game. I do not need their temper tantrums to do my job. Works for me and I do not have to give a T. Almost never had an additional problem and usually have coaches apologize and then go back to coaching.

When you tell them what can happen that is a "threat." I see nothing wrong with doing that when you are threatening them with what is going to be the result of their actions (like a T or playing time for a kid) then usually the get you. But you do all this other negotiating and then they try to make it about you. We need to focus on their behavior and what the behavior brings. I am a man, I am not going to be treated any thing but as I would treat them. If you want to act like a child, then you will be treated as such.

Peace

[deecee]

Originally Posted by Welpe

You're missing the point. We are held to a higher standard of comportment because we are supposed to be the unemotional arbiters of the game. It's generally more acceptable for some coaches to act the way they do because they have an emotional investment in the outcome.

That doesn't make it right but it's true.

I've been doing this 15 years. I get the point. I'm over the point. There are times where toeing the company line doesn't get anything resolved. Would I recommend sarcastic responses to newer officials? No. But after a while enough is enough and I'm ok with NOT going to "rulebook" responses. Part of the art is how do you handle responses when you stray off course. That's where experience kicks in. Hopefully.

And saying we don't have an emotional investment is balderdash. We are human. Sometimes we get angry, happy, sad, and we may try our best to keep these "out" but that's unrealistic. First you have to accept them in before you can deal with your reactions. None more true than an ahole coach that crosses the line and gets T'd up. Say what you want but there are times where I get pissed after the T because they were complete jerks. A very small percentage of people in life NEVER have emotion. They are usually sociopaths. I don't think I'm one of them.

[JRutledge]

Originally Posted by deecee

I've been doing this 15 years. I get the point. I'm over the point. There are times where toeing the company line doesn't get anything resolved. Would I recommend sarcastic responses to newer officials? No. But after a while enough is enough and I'm ok with NOT going to "rulebook" responses. Part of the art is how do you handle responses when you stray off course. That's where experience kicks in. Hopefully.

And saying we don't have an emotional investment is balderdash. We are human. Sometimes we get angry, happy, sad, and we may try our best to keep these "out" but that's unrealistic. First you have to accept them in before you can deal with your reactions. None more true than an ahole coach that crosses the line and gets T'd up. Say what you want but there are times where I get pissed after the T because they were complete jerks. A very small percentage of people in life NEVER have emotion. They are usually sociopaths. I don't think I'm one of them.

And I advocate that we do what works for us in our personality. If you are sarcastic and that comes natural to you, then you can use sarcasm. If you are a hardazz, then be a hardazz when you feel it is necessary. Most of the time we never have to get in the chest of a coach at all. Many are reasonable and will talk to you directly and calmly. But when they don't, sometimes we have to basically get to the basics of human interaction.

Peace

[Welpe]

Originally Posted by deecee

I've been doing this 15 years. I get the point. I'm over the point. There are times where toeing the company line doesn't get anything resolved. Would I recommend sarcastic responses to newer officials? No. But after a while enough is enough and I'm ok with NOT going to "rulebook" responses. Part of the art is how do you handle responses when you stray off course. That's where experience kicks in. Hopefully.

And saying we don't have an emotional investment is balderdash. We are human. Sometimes we get angry, happy, sad, and we may try our best to keep these "out" but that's unrealistic. First you have to accept them in before you can deal with your reactions. None more true than an ahole coach that crosses the line and gets T'd up. Say what you want but there are times where I get pissed after the T because they were complete jerks. A very small percentage of people in life NEVER have emotion. They are usually sociopaths. I don't think I'm one of them.

You asked the question, I'm just explaining why it is.

As a great philosopher once said, “They Don’t Think It Be Like It Is, But It Do”.

[deecee]

Originally Posted by Welpe

You asked the question, I'm just explaining why it is.

Oh I made a statement after a rhetorical question. I know the answer to "Why do coaches get free passes for their behavior?" It's because to many officials are either scared of T's because they are bad, or don't do a good job in dealing with conflict.

[Adam]

Originally Posted by deecee

Oh I made a statement after a rhetorical question. I know the answer to "Why do coaches get free passes for their behavior?" It's because to many officials are either scared of T's because they are bad, or don't do a good job in dealing with conflict.

Also because sports society tends to think juvenile behavior is ok if the game might be on the line.

[RedAndWhiteRef]

Originally Posted by Adam

Also because sports society tends to think juvenile behavior is ok if the game might be on the line.

Last night in a JV game the visiting team fell down by double digits in the third. The coach growled at me "every single whistle you've had has been for them (the home team). Every single whistle. Thanks a lot. Thanks a lot."

I just ignored it, but when his team came back and won by a point, I wanted to ask him where my congratulations were.

From now on, coaches don't get my respect till they earn it. I've dealt with too much crap this season.