T Worthy?
 

I have learned that a complaining coach usually gets a warning first, but personal attacks on your integrity can merit an immediate T.

Freshman Girls, 4:00, few fans. First minute, B1 holding the ball over her head in the FC, directly in front of Coach A. A1 reaches for the ball, and gradually contacts the arms of B1, and eventually displaces her. This took a few seconds. The problem was, just before I whistle for the foul, Coach B says "That's a foul!".
Coach A immediately says to me, softly, "You weren't going to call that until he said something. I need you to call your own game".

Caught me off-guard, I just replied "That had nothing to do with it".

T?

I wouldn't. I would say "I need you to worry about coaching and leave the officiating to us." and walk away.

You can head this off by looking at coach B immediately after the whistle with the "I've got this" look -- and maybe even use those words.

If you have time for a longer talk "If you (or he) yell 'foul' and it isn't, we just play on. But if I blow my whistle and then say 'oops' it's a big deal. So, my whistle will always come after you could say something."

Or, to coach B -- you know, if you keep yelling for the call before I can make it, it looks like you are influencing my call and I might not be able to make it.

We had a coach like this last night. He was always faster than us on the call and of course would call out whether he was right or not. Not loud enough where anyone but the tableside official could hear. I really didn't care and it didn't affect anything.

But I have a line for a coach who thinks he's better than us cause we're slow:

"I know you're faster, coach, but we actually have to be right."

Over the last 2 years I have adopted a more "honest" approach to coaches and I like this line. I had an awful game this past Friday that had about 40 or so fouls.

At some point in the third quarter the HC and one of his assistants said, after a foul, that I was calling a lot and to "let them play". I responded with a very sarcastic line "It was my plan when I left my family at 6PM to blow my whistle this much and officiate such a sloppily played game." I said this while looking at them both.

Would I recommend this line to other officials probably not. But shortly after that the HC complained, again, about a call in a game in which he team was up 40. I told him flat out that I'm done with him and my patience are gone for the remainder of the game. 2 minutes later I have a block charge call that goes against him 80 feet away, he yells something across the court for lowering the shoulder, I T move one, game ends like 4 hours later.

Out of curiosity do others on here get so fed up with a game, like a huge sloppy blowout that you remove all rope for the winning team and their complaining?

I had a coach yell about a 3-second violation (one of 3 I called that season, I think) on one of his late game players when he was up 37.

Of course I was tableside C and was right in front of him. I looked at him, turned and looked at the scoreboard, and looked back at him again. Didn't say a word, might have shaken my head a little bit. Went to the other end of the floor.

Some coaches just can't turn it off. Head a story about a coach who went out of his way to get whacked up 35 earlier this season. Also heard the coach was proud of it, too.

"I need you to coach your players, not me." That's his warning.

Somewhat along those lines, what advice do you have for responding to a coach who repeatedly comments to you about your partner's calls?

I'll be in front of the coach during play and he'll say stuff like "I know that's not your call but you gotta help your partner out." OR "Cmon, PLEASE talk to your partner!"

I usually just ignore it, because it's not like he's asking me a legitimate question.

Not sure if it's a divide & conquer strategy? Like the coach will suck up to one official while putting down the other? (NOTE: I"m SURE there have been times when it was reversed and I was the lead and a coach was complaining to my partner about me:))

Should it just be flat-out ignored?

I wouldn't T for this, I wouldn't even warn the fouling team's coach. I'd let him know that was not the case and then I'd let Team A's coach know that I need him to let me make the calls.

No need to nuke it from orbit at this point.

*This is an interesting question. Coaches have many tactics up their sleeve and that is one of them--the ole "divide and conquer" maneuver (getting you to oppose/question your partner), the non-verbal "whaaat?" look, pre-arranged placement of confederates in the stands to taunt/deride you on calls, etc.
I heard at a camp once that a clinician said to tell coaches "when the other ref transitions/rotates back then ask him why he made that call". However, I found that advice to actually undermine the crew's unity and facilitate the bias that coaches want to impose, so I never used it. What I tell coaches is something to the effect of this: "the official got a good look at the play, and reported what he saw (or did not call what he did not see)".

I'd shut it down after the second time or so. "Coach, if you have a question for him, you'll need to talk to him about it."

Could always go with the smart aleck response: hey, assistant coach, help me out with your head coach here. PLEASE explain to him what I expect.

+1 or I can't/don't speak for him you would have to ask him yourself.

If I wanted to be snarky (and there's a good chance in this case), "Coach, we're all adults here, so you'll need to talk to him yourself."

I'm the center tableside and the coach is in my ear kvetching about a no call on the other side of the floor. Two officials over there on a play where my correct call percentage wouldn't be much better than if I flipped a coin.

"I have two partners over there who have a much better look at that play than we do. I'm not here to guess."