Pregame conferences: Captains and Coaches

[Rooster]

I'm looking for thoughts on Captains and Coaches pregames. (Captains and Coaches... sounds like a cereal, eh?)

For my Captains' meeting I usually go with "Good evening fellas/ladies. (I then introduce my partner and myself) Let's make sure we're pursuing victory with honor. It's real important that white talks to white and blue talks to blue. Any questions? Have a great game and good luck."

What I avoid:
"I'm so and so, this is my partner, so and so and we'll be your referees tonight." I bite the inside of my cheek when my partners say that lest I bust out laughing thinking of all the smart ash things that could be said in response...
"Help us out with the balls that go out of bounds, etc."
"Let's watch out for the hand checking."
"You're the speaking captains, so we'll listen to you."
"Are your teammates properly equipped?"

For my Coaches' meetings... I introduce my partner and myself then ask if players are properly equipped. I remind them of the coach's box and ask them to make sure they're pursuing victory with honor. I finish with "Any questions? Good luck." A handshake and out.

I don't like the "Help us out with the timeouts, thirty or full." Nor do I like the "We'll be happy to answer any questions during the game."

Anything I should add or subtract for either? Why?

Thanks.