With all due respect....

[umpref]

....I was a member here before, primarily in another sport. I left. Why?

Simply because it seems that there are many guys on here that want to play "gotcha" with loaded questions, or use mistakes in grammar to blast somebody as being wrong.

It seems that some around here (no, I will no start naming names) want to argue and nitpick, rather than discuss and educate.

I certainly know how easy it is to fall into the traps of playing "gotcha!" and flame wars. I have certainly been involved with my share of both on other BBS's.

I took a LONG break from BBS's (about a year....forever in internet terms...LOL) and just recently came back here to engage in discussions about basketball, which is a very new sport for me.

I gotta say, I am about ready to leave. It seems that almost every thread turns into a p i s s i n g match!

Guys, if your contributions, EVEN SOME OF THE TIME is nothing more than arguing against somebody, maybe you need a break from this! Seriously! If posting questions, then replying with "gotcha" is something you do more than say once every 3 months or so, maybe it is time for a break. You are obviously missing the spirit of what a BBS is about.

Really, it comes down to the "Golden Rule". Treat others the way you would like to be treated. Maybe as sports officials, I would challenge you to treat others BETTER than you would like to be treated, and BETTER THAN THEY DESERVE! Let's leave the baiting, heckling, and gamesmanship to the coaches! We are supposed to be a team, and not JUST on the field of play.

Can I get a AMEN?

[tomegun]

I'm not going to go so far as to give you that amen, but I know what you are saying. I will say this, knowing that some of those "gotchas" may come my way: what you see on internet sites are often people with mysterious personas who can say and do whatever they want from behind their keyboard. In reality, some people can't officiate their way out of the locker room, but have something to say about every aspect of the game. I'm not necessarily talking about this site.

This year is my first year back in Vegas and there are many faces I don't know. When an individual always has a wise-guy comment I always ask someone I know if that person can officiate. Every time, the answer is no. Those are the officials who I would think should learn how to shut up and listen first. In Southern Nevada we are going through some volatile times and listening should be priority number one.

What I will agree with you about is we are a team. With the proper dedication and listening skills, we can all become better officials, better partners and better caretakers of the game we all love.

[jeffpea]

overall I agree with your viewpoint...it can become rather argumentative in here with too many posts digressing into the "I'm right and you're wrong" viewpoint.

forums like this (as well as email, instant messaging, and texting) are a poor method of communicating - especially when a situation presented really requires a person to have seen the play live (or on tape) in order to answer effectively. additionally, comments are too often extrapolated out to their extremes. it's also hard to know when/how much sarcasm is conveyed via the typed word - if any at all.

can I make a suggestion?

as with other things in life, don't take all the viewpoints/comments of people in here so personal. you don't know them, they don't know you - so you should never be offended by people you don't know (what do you care what they think anyway?). take the comments and suggestions that make sense to heart and disregard the rest....

imho, i think you'll enjoy this forum much more if you can do that.

happy holidays!

[rockyroad]

Hey umpref,

Under User CP there is an Ignore List...it's a beautiful thing. There are several people on my Ignore list as I believe they are exactly the kind of people you are talking about. Conversely, I am sure I am on several people's Ignore List. It makes the whole Board so much better when you don't have to read the postings of certain people.

[BillyMac]

Originally Posted by rockyroad

Under User CP there is an Ignore List...it's a beautiful thing. There are several people on my Ignore list as I believe they are exactly the kind of people you are talking about. It makes the whole Board so much better when you don't have to read the postings of certain people.

rockyroad: Please take me off your ignore list. I occasionally have a few pertinent things to say. Not very often, but, occasionally.

[BillyMac]

umpref: There's a lot of great advice on this Forum. Just ignore anything that you find offensive. And even if your treated disrespectfully, be the bigger man, and treat those posters with respect, whether they deserve it, or not. That's what I do. I kill them with kindness, and, images, lots of images.

[rsl]

I'm a rookie, I'm too young to join pissing contests, and I don't know enough to contribute that much here. But, where else can I get home from a game at 9:00PM from a game, post a question from the game, and get an answer from several experts before I go to bed.

I understand that it can get contentious here, but overall this board is a great resource that makes anyone who reads a better ref. Criticize all you want, but if I get good answers I'll keep reading.

[Back In The Saddle]

Originally Posted by BillyMac

umpref: There's a lot of great advice on this Forum. Just ignore anything that you find offensive. And even if your treated disrespectfully, be the bigger man, and treat those posters with respect, whether they deserve it, or not. That's what I do. I kill them with kindness, and, images, lots of images.

How's that 12 step program working for you, Billy?

[Forksref]

I take these forums with a grain of salt. I learn a heck of a lot from them but I don't let the arguments bother me. I take what I can and give what I can and don't let the rest bother me. It's like TV. I can always turn the channel by moving on to another thread. Most people in here are good-hearted people who want to learn more about officiating and improve their game. I never take it personal in here.

No big deal. Have a good day. Kumbaya. Sideline warning, no yardage.

[rockyroad]

Originally Posted by BillyMac

rockyroad: Please take me off your ignore list. I occasionally have a few pertinent things to say. Not very often, but, occasionally.

What?? What did he say?? Did you guys hear anything?

[Back In The Saddle]

First of all, welcome back.

Second, if this place is useful to you, then by all means please participate and contribute.

Third, please don't be yet another ungrateful whiner who tries to refashion the forum after his or her own Utopian ideal.

If you want to be part of this community, then be part of it. If you don't, then don't. Either way, it won't cost you a dime. But we are what we are; don't expect us to change for you.

Can I get an AMEN?

[M&M Guy]

Originally Posted by umpref

I gotta say, I am about ready to leave. It seems that almost every thread turns into a p i s s i n g match!

Maybe I'm missing something, but, at this moment, in glancing at the whole first page of posts, I'm not sure where I find very many pissing matches at all, much less "almost every thread". Or, just by the mere fact I disagree, is this now considered a pissing match?

Originally Posted by umpref

Guys, if your contributions, EVEN SOME OF THE TIME is nothing more than arguing against somebody, maybe you need a break from this! Seriously!

There are many of us that take this avocation very seriously. Some would say even passionately. Since officiating can be just as much an art as it is a science, there can be passionate opinions on both sides of an issue where both sides feel equally correct. Since the goal is for all of us to be on the same "team", how do you propose we discuss rules, mechanics, and philosophies with officials who disagree? Should we just sit back, nod our head, and say, "Ok, we disgree"? How does that contribute to getting us all on that same team, with the same philosophies?

Another aspect to officiating in general, and not just basketball, is having a thick skin when it comes to criticism and complaints. Part of growing as an official is having the confidence to deal with criticism, and knowing how to communicate well enough to express thoughts and ideas without getting into pissing matches. Also, understanding who you're communicating with can go a long way towards understanding how to communicate with them. Perhaps some of the communication that goes on here may seem like pissing matches to the casual observer, when it is nothing more than kidding around between friends.

Originally Posted by umpref

Can I get a AMEN?

Not right at the moment. But, thanks for asking.

[Adam]

And here I thought we'd turned more kindlier and gentlier.

FWIW ("For What It's Worth" for those of you over 60), if I write something that offends someone, I prefer to get a private post informing me of my transgression so I can either explain myself or apologize publicly (if appropriate).

I agree with M&M, I really haven't seen anything lately that fits the description of the OP. I guess that means I owe M&M an "amen" or something.

[M&M Guy]

Originally Posted by Snaqwells

I guess that means I owe M&M an "amen" or something.

Nah, just a simple "shut up" will do.

[26 Year Gap]

Originally Posted by M&M Guy

Nah, just a simple "shut up" will do.

Before you shut up, could you repeat your post?