The Official Forum

The Official Forum (https://forum.officiating.com/)
-   Basketball (https://forum.officiating.com/basketball/)
-   -   With all due respect.... (https://forum.officiating.com/basketball/55645-all-due-respect.html)

umpref Thu Dec 03, 2009 03:19pm

With all due respect....
 
....I was a member here before, primarily in another sport. I left. Why?

Simply because it seems that there are many guys on here that want to play "gotcha" with loaded questions, or use mistakes in grammar to blast somebody as being wrong.

It seems that some around here (no, I will no start naming names) want to argue and nitpick, rather than discuss and educate.

I certainly know how easy it is to fall into the traps of playing "gotcha!" and flame wars. I have certainly been involved with my share of both on other BBS's.

I took a LONG break from BBS's (about a year....forever in internet terms...LOL) and just recently came back here to engage in discussions about basketball, which is a very new sport for me.

I gotta say, I am about ready to leave. It seems that almost every thread turns into a p i s s i n g match!

Guys, if your contributions, EVEN SOME OF THE TIME is nothing more than arguing against somebody, maybe you need a break from this! Seriously! If posting questions, then replying with "gotcha" is something you do more than say once every 3 months or so, maybe it is time for a break. You are obviously missing the spirit of what a BBS is about.

Really, it comes down to the "Golden Rule". Treat others the way you would like to be treated. Maybe as sports officials, I would challenge you to treat others BETTER than you would like to be treated, and BETTER THAN THEY DESERVE! Let's leave the baiting, heckling, and gamesmanship to the coaches! ;) We are supposed to be a team, and not JUST on the field of play.

Can I get a AMEN? :)

tomegun Thu Dec 03, 2009 03:28pm

I'm not going to go so far as to give you that amen, but I know what you are saying. I will say this, knowing that some of those "gotchas" may come my way: what you see on internet sites are often people with mysterious personas who can say and do whatever they want from behind their keyboard. In reality, some people can't officiate their way out of the locker room, but have something to say about every aspect of the game. I'm not necessarily talking about this site.

This year is my first year back in Vegas and there are many faces I don't know. When an individual always has a wise-guy comment I always ask someone I know if that person can officiate. Every time, the answer is no. Those are the officials who I would think should learn how to shut up and listen first. In Southern Nevada we are going through some volatile times and listening should be priority number one.

What I will agree with you about is we are a team. With the proper dedication and listening skills, we can all become better officials, better partners and better caretakers of the game we all love.

jeffpea Thu Dec 03, 2009 03:36pm

overall I agree with your viewpoint...it can become rather argumentative in here with too many posts digressing into the "I'm right and you're wrong" viewpoint.

forums like this (as well as email, instant messaging, and texting) are a poor method of communicating - especially when a situation presented really requires a person to have seen the play live (or on tape) in order to answer effectively. additionally, comments are too often extrapolated out to their extremes. it's also hard to know when/how much sarcasm is conveyed via the typed word - if any at all.

can I make a suggestion?

as with other things in life, don't take all the viewpoints/comments of people in here so personal. you don't know them, they don't know you - so you should never be offended by people you don't know (what do you care what they think anyway?). take the comments and suggestions that make sense to heart and disregard the rest....

imho, i think you'll enjoy this forum much more if you can do that.

happy holidays!

rockyroad Thu Dec 03, 2009 03:56pm

Hey umpref,

Under User CP there is an Ignore List...it's a beautiful thing. There are several people on my Ignore list as I believe they are exactly the kind of people you are talking about. Conversely, I am sure I am on several people's Ignore List. It makes the whole Board so much better when you don't have to read the postings of certain people.

M&M Guy Thu Dec 03, 2009 03:59pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by umpref (Post 639417)
I gotta say, I am about ready to leave. It seems that almost every thread turns into a p i s s i n g match!

Maybe I'm missing something, but, at this moment, in glancing at the whole first page of posts, I'm not sure where I find very many pissing matches at all, much less "almost every thread". Or, just by the mere fact I disagree, is this now considered a pissing match? :)

Quote:

Originally Posted by umpref (Post 639417)
Guys, if your contributions, EVEN SOME OF THE TIME is nothing more than arguing against somebody, maybe you need a break from this! Seriously!

There are many of us that take this avocation very seriously. Some would say even passionately. Since officiating can be just as much an art as it is a science, there can be passionate opinions on both sides of an issue where both sides feel equally correct. Since the goal is for all of us to be on the same "team", how do you propose we discuss rules, mechanics, and philosophies with officials who disagree? Should we just sit back, nod our head, and say, "Ok, we disgree"? How does that contribute to getting us all on that same team, with the same philosophies?

Another aspect to officiating in general, and not just basketball, is having a thick skin when it comes to criticism and complaints. Part of growing as an official is having the confidence to deal with criticism, and knowing how to communicate well enough to express thoughts and ideas without getting into pissing matches. Also, understanding who you're communicating with can go a long way towards understanding how to communicate with them. Perhaps some of the communication that goes on here may seem like pissing matches to the casual observer, when it is nothing more than kidding around between friends.

Quote:

Originally Posted by umpref (Post 639417)
Can I get a AMEN? :)

Not right at the moment. But, thanks for asking. :)

Adam Thu Dec 03, 2009 04:02pm

And here I thought we'd turned more kindlier and gentlier.

FWIW ("For What It's Worth" for those of you over 60), if I write something that offends someone, I prefer to get a private post informing me of my transgression so I can either explain myself or apologize publicly (if appropriate).

I agree with M&M, I really haven't seen anything lately that fits the description of the OP. I guess that means I owe M&M an "amen" or something.

M&M Guy Thu Dec 03, 2009 04:04pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Snaqwells (Post 639436)
I guess that means I owe M&M an "amen" or something.

Nah, just a simple "shut up" will do. :D

26 Year Gap Thu Dec 03, 2009 04:13pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by M&M Guy (Post 639438)
Nah, just a simple "shut up" will do. :D

Before you shut up, could you repeat your post?

M&M Guy Thu Dec 03, 2009 04:16pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by 26 Year Gap (Post 639439)
Before you shut up, could you repeat your post?

Shut up.

(Oh, wait, not that post?) :D

JRutledge Thu Dec 03, 2009 04:24pm

I agree and I disagree. Honestly I do think there are people that take things too far. But honestly, I could give a damn. I have better things to worry about then what someone says that I will never work with or meet ever. And I have stopped engaging in a lot of discussions on here because I have better things to do. Honestly, it is about your approach to life. Do you really care what some guy sitting behind a computer really thinks? I know I don't. And like JeffPea said, people rely too much on interactions of text and email style conversations, they do not know the difference when someone is being mean or just giving them information. My thing is if you like the place stay. If you do not like the place, leave. Either way what we think of you or don't think of you should not ever matter. I doubt anyone here gives you games or will work with you. And if they do meet you, they probably will not have the balls to say anything to your face. This is about my 13th year here and on many of these boards; I am the same here as I am in public. In public is it just easier to show how matter of fact these discussions are to me. On here, people take a lot of things personal when you are just giving a point of view. I do not have time to hold everyone's hand and neither should anyone else. With all due respect. :D

Peace

bbcof83 Thu Dec 03, 2009 04:27pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Snaqwells (Post 639436)
...
FWIW ("For What It's Worth" for those of you over 60), if I write something that offends someone, I prefer to get a private post informing me of my transgression so I can either explain myself or apologize publicly (if appropriate)....

Snaqs, did you attend the Tiger Woods school of PR?

26 Year Gap Thu Dec 03, 2009 04:31pm

There is also the ignore feature that you can employ for posters you find irritating. Hello? Hello? HellOOOOOOOOO!

Freddy Thu Dec 03, 2009 04:35pm

re. "You're-an-Eight-ing Matches"
 
Welcome, new guy, to a discussion board which will teach you, enlighten you, inspire you, sometimes discomfort you, and oft-times entertain you.
Don't let the sometimes cranky responses upset you. Treat them as you would a chatty coach -- ignore them.
After a while you will, as I did, become desensitized to the chatter and glean the good stuff available here.
Not really an "Amen", cuz I've kinda come to enjoy the snide responses now and then.
And don't worry about having to correct my grammer or speeling. Mistaks like that are something even I can'not put up with.
Enjoy your season!

Adam Thu Dec 03, 2009 04:36pm

Dude, you're going to give mbyron a heart attack.

BillyMac Thu Dec 03, 2009 08:33pm

Please ...
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by rockyroad (Post 639434)
Under User CP there is an Ignore List...it's a beautiful thing. There are several people on my Ignore list as I believe they are exactly the kind of people you are talking about. It makes the whole Board so much better when you don't have to read the postings of certain people.

rockyroad: Please take me off your ignore list. I occasionally have a few pertinent things to say. Not very often, but, occasionally.


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 11:52pm.



Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.3.0 RC1