Importance of games

[mbyron]

Originally Posted by Nevadaref

To the contrary, I was trying to emphasize a point to some seemingly out-of-control PARENTS that they are placing WAY too much importance on the outcome of a kids game.

Just a comment about this particular point. I have a theory about why the parents of 4th graders are typically worse than the parents of 7th graders, who are in turn typically worse than the parents of varsity players.

Apart from just getting old and tired like me, the parents of teenage players have been watching kids play for years. For the most part, they have learned the game better, they have learned what to expect from amateur referees, and they have learned how little good they can achieve by hurling abuse at anyone (officials, opponents, coaches, etc.).

But I think maybe the most important thing they've learned is: their kids are going to lose sometimes. I think that this fact is hard for parents of younger kids to accept and motivates the obnoxious behavior that officials at that level must endure.

So I don't think it's just the "relative importance" or whatever that parents need to learn. They are so invested in the outcome because they haven't discovered that learning to lose with grace is one of the great lessons sports can teach.

[Nevadaref]

Originally Posted by mbyron

Just a comment about this particular point. I have a theory about why the parents of 4th graders are typically worse than the parents of 7th graders, who are in turn typically worse than the parents of varsity players.

Apart from just getting old and tired like me, the parents of teenage players have been watching kids play for years. For the most part, they have learned the game better, they have learned what to expect from amateur referees, and they have learned how little good they can achieve by hurling abuse at anyone (officials, opponents, coaches, etc.).

But I think maybe the most important thing they've learned is: their kids are going to lose sometimes. I think that this fact is hard for parents of younger kids to accept and motivates the obnoxious behavior that officials at that level must endure.

So I don't think it's just the "relative importance" or whatever that parents need to learn. They are so invested in the outcome because they haven't discovered that learning to lose with grace is one of the great lessons sports can teach.

An excellent point, very eloquently stated.

I'll note that I have made a similar observation before concerning youth games about parents learning to understand that little Johnny or Suzie will fall down or even get knocked down at some point in the contest and the official may or may not deem the action to be an offense, but either way it isn't the end of the world, nor likely that the kid will suffer permanent damage or the loss of a D1 scholarship.

[cardinalfan]

I don't work anything but higher level high school games and small college (baseball), but I have nothing but respect for anyone who will give their time and energy to officiate elementary leagues, rec leagues, or even adult independent leagues. For pay/abuse ratio, these are usually the worst.

I think we're comparing apples and oranges, but it doesn't matter what level you work, you should always try to improve and give a quality effort. I think this forum is for all officials who want to improve, vent, or just waste time!

[Bad Zebra]

Each year, I work an 11U tournament at the end of their season. I do this to try to give back to the leagues and parents that gave me my start in officiating. It is often ugly and frustrating, but I'm compelled to do it out of loyalty.

That being said, I don't think scenarios and situations that occur at this level are the best cases for discussion on this forum. My perception is that the officials (and coaches and lurkers) that post and comment here are generally beyond that level of expertise. I try to keep the audience in mind when I comment or ask questions.

[Amesman]

Originally Posted by Bad Zebra

That being said, I don't think scenarios and situations that occur at this level are the best cases for discussion on this forum. My perception is that the officials (and coaches and lurkers) that post and comment here are generally beyond that level of expertise. I try to keep the audience in mind when I comment or ask questions.

They might not be the best scenarios, but I wouldn't ever say they don't have a place here -- just as long as we get the right frame of reference as to what perspective the question is coming from.

Remember that even if kid rec leagues have things like no pressing in the back court, the majority of them still are grounded in NFHS rules. Who knows those best? Largely the ladies and gentlemen of this board who have postings in the four digits (or three or two or one ...)

So while I wouldn't want to see this board overtaken by the kid (or adult) rec-league questions, they have a place. Just as they did in the development of every official who ever pulled on the stripes. Besides, remember what they always say: If some crazy, rulebook-testing scenario is going to happen, it will occur at these lower levels -- and that's perfect for readying oneself for a bigger stage.

[JRutledge]

Anytime there are no banners being hung on the wall or ceiling for winning something, the level of importance should drop.

Peace

[Rich]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

Anytime there are no banners being hung on the wall or ceiling for winning something, the level of importance should drop.

Peace

We all see things through different eyes. I can have a varsity game go down to the wire and, while it's fun to work a game like that, it doesn't raise my BP or heart rate like it did 15 years ago. It's just another game and I have no vested interest in the outcome, other than I want to make the proper calls and call the game the right way. No different than any other game.

As a parent of a young child (she's 4), I cannot imagine any game she plays before high school having any meaning other than "is she having fun" and "is she getting good exercise and learning how to be a good teammate." It's why I don't work games involving small kids, cause I wouldn't hesitate to tell parents screaming about calls to "get a life" at times when it was needed (or I'd have them removed, which is even sadder).