Parents Say The Darndest Things

[aceholleran]

Game is a rout. As losers take last licks, R1, running unwisely, interferes with F3, who is attempting to field a pop-up. It's a 100 percenter; couldn't NOT call it. It's the penultimate out in the game.

Losing skip has a cow and lets loose with a volley of invective right in my puss, forcing me to run him. Again, couldn't NOT do it.

I head up to press box/changing room after game. It's on a second level, with an outside staircase. I can hear parents grumbling outside, so I hang inside for a while, trying to use discretion, which I admit is a dictum I do not always follow.

Finally, I hear one woman's frantic voice, screaming, "I want to see that umpire!" Too juicy for me, so I take the bait. I stand on the second floor landing, in mufti.

"Are you the umpire who called my Jason out?" she keens.

It didn't take Conan Doyle acumen to figure who "her Jason" might have been. I smiled as hugely as I could. "That would be me," I say sweetly.

She lets loose with a few blasts concerning my eyesight, ethics, parentage and other obvious flaws in my worldview. My smile never wanes. She then rummages in her copious, TrashMart purse for a pen and paper. "I want your name, so I can report you to the league."

"No problem, " I say. "Palermo. Steve Palermo. P-A-L-E-R-M-O." Which she scribbles down.

Couldn't NOT do it.

Ace

[johnnyg08]

now that's good stuff right there.

[SanDiegoSteve]

Originally Posted by aceholleran

She lets loose with a few blasts concerning my eyesight, ethics, parentage and other obvious flaws in my worldview. My smile never wanes. She then rummages in her copious, TrashMart purse for a pen and paper. "I want your name, so I can report you to the league."

"No problem, " I say. "Palermo. Steve Palermo. P-A-L-E-R-M-O." Which she scribbles down.

Couldn't NOT do it.

Ace

Probably mentioned it before, but my partner and I once answered that proverbial question by patiently spelling out our names for the nice, sweet lady: Harry W-E-N-D-E-L-S-T-E-D-T and Bruce F-R-O-E-M-M-I-N-G.

Hey, maybe it was the same lady! (or a close relative )

[jwwashburn]

A dad wanted my name so he could complain about my lousy strike zone to my "boss." My UIC was my partner so, I said wait a second-you can talk to him in person. Hey _______ this gentleman wants to tell you how much my "umping" sucks!

Amazingly, the dad just walked away.

Joe in Missouri

[TwoBits]

Heard this weekend from a dad when the catcher stepped behind the right-handed batter in the box trying a snap throw to third base:

"Just hit the batter in the head if he doesn't get out of the way! That way he'll be called out for interference!"

[johnnyg08]

Originally Posted by TwoBits

Heard this weekend from a dad when the catcher stepped behind the right-handed batter in the box trying a snap throw to third base:

"Just hit the batter in the head if he doesn't get out of the way! That way he'll be called out for interference!"

He must have played AAA