illegal pitch (confession: good for the soul?)

[Little Jimmy]

I'm not happy with what I did last night. I need to confess.

Our local crew was chosen to work one of the MD state semis last night. I was plate. My zone/focus was great and my partners were on top of all calls in the infield and outfield. We had no problems and I think we showed very well.

But. First pitch of the evening. Pitcher walks on to plate and immediately puts hands together. Stands looking at catcher for 2-4 seconds then delivers the pitch. I look, think and do not signal illegal. Second pitch, same as the first. I again look, think and do not signal illegal.

This goes against everything I've said I wanted to do differently this year. No more "she didn't gain an advantage" or "no one is complaining". My motto this year has been if it's illegal call it and let the chips fall where they may. But not last night. I said to myself during those first few pitches that if she's gotten this far doing this and no one else has called it then I'm not going to be the first.

For what it's worth (not much) she didn't gain an advantage and no one did complain. The other team hit her fairly hard and won 3-0. But the fact that I said to myself "not in this situation, this game's too big" bothers me. Many of the local vets that I admire and trust don't consider this particular infraction one that is worthy of enforcing in last nights situation. That doesn't make it any easier for me.

I've been replaying the game over in my mind and I keep saying that if I had it to do over again I would have called the very first pitch illegal and lived with the consequences. But I can't go back in time. Any comments?