Parent blows up

[BigCat]

Originally Posted by deecee

And I don't do this for the kids (even though all the benevolent parents and coaches do). I personally like the rule.

The entire free world knows you dont do this for the kids...isnt necessary for you to repeat it twice a week...As for the rule, i'm sure it works but i think tossing the idiot parent and suspending/banning him from games would work just as well.

[Adam]

Originally Posted by BigCat

The entire free world knows you dont do this for the kids...isnt necessary for you to repeat it twice a week...As for the rule, i'm sure it works but i think tossing the idiot parent and suspending/banning him from games would work just as well.

Very few of us do it for the kids ("for the kids" is the single phrase that makes me nearly vomit) but I think his point is valid here and appropriate.

I'm not calling the team T (unless directed to do so) here, but I like the rule that sends players out with their parents when mom or dad gets tossed. AAU can be a horrible environment for officials, so draconian measures aren't really out of place.

[Adam]

Originally Posted by BlueDevilRef

Agreed.
But to be fair, every complex around here where they play travel ball has at least four courts going on at same time with one site manager. It's generally up to the officials to police it. Most of the time it's simple enough to tell people to leave but I'm sure we have all had to delay games waiting for some idiot to leave. Our sites are pretty good at taking care of things and backing officials if it comes to ejecting someone.

They need to have someone ready to pounce if a fan comes on the court. I'm not saying they need to be able to stop it from happening every single time, but when it does happen I shouldn't be the one to deal with it.

I know travel is a different animal, and maybe that's why I don't work nearly as much of it as I used to (aside from the pay), but expecting officials to deal with this nonsense is too much. I suppose instituting severe penalties like Nevada describes would be helpful.

[BigT]

Originally Posted by Whistles & Stripes

OK, I made a bad assumption. I assumed the coach came out to berate the officials. If he just came out to take care of his player, I've got nothing on him.

KK,

That was my fault. Cant believe the things that happen in AAU here and got typing too fast.

[BigCat]

Originally Posted by Adam

Very few of us do it for the kids ("for the kids" is the single phrase that makes me nearly vomit) but I think his point is valid here and appropriate.

I'm not calling the team T (unless directed to do so) here, but I like the rule that sends players out with their parents when mom or dad gets tossed. AAU can be a horrible environment for officials, so draconian measures aren't really out of place.

Ok. In earlier post you also indicated not to punish the kid. Frankly, I tend to want to punish the bad actor. That's my position and i like what BNR mentioned…security and handcuffs.

Also, i don't think why we do what we do or who we do it for or "for the kids" has anything to do with it. I know everybody has different reasons for doing it. I have many reasons for doing it. I just think bad actors should be punished/barred etc. I'm not a fan of guilt by association when one person isn't able to choose who he's associated with… That doesn't have anything to do with why i'm there or your there etc.

I understand the position and if its truly gotten that bad then that may be all that's left...

[so cal lurker]

Originally Posted by BigCat

Ok. In earlier post you also indicated not to punish the kid. Frankly, I tend to want to punish the bad actor.

Any parent ejected should not be permittee back at a basketball game until taking a referee course and passing the exam.

[LRZ]

FWIW, I'm in the "kick out and ban the parent, don't penalize the [probably mortified] kid" school.

[BigT]

I was in the camp of don't punish the kid. After having a parent wanting to assault me in the parking lot last month and the City Attorney not wanting to do anything I am all for the kid leaving with the parent. That feels like it will stop the behavior. Just leaving a gym where they hate the referees anyway doesnt feel like it will change any behavior.

[Adam]

Originally Posted by BigCat

Ok. In earlier post you also indicated not to punish the kid. Frankly, I tend to want to punish the bad actor. That's my position and i like what BNR mentioned…security and handcuffs.

Also, i don't think why we do what we do or who we do it for or "for the kids" has anything to do with it. I know everybody has different reasons for doing it. I have many reasons for doing it. I just think bad actors should be punished/barred etc. I'm not a fan of guilt by association when one person isn't able to choose who he's associated with… That doesn't have anything to do with why i'm there or your there etc.

I understand the position and if its truly gotten that bad then that may be all that's left...

Some people want to say not to punish the kids because we do this for the kids. I think that's what he was responding to. I'll admit my reaction is sometimes just as reflexive on that topic.

My main point with that is that I'm not calling a technical foul on the team for Dad's stupidity here. If a league decides to add penalties such as removing the player when a parent gets tossed, I can see valid reasons to support that. I've done enough travel ball in the past to know just how bad these knuckleheads can be.

[deecee]

BigCat I responded to you in regards to "I'd ask you to remember kids don't get to choose their parents"

I'm saying I don't care. It's 8th grade AAU ball which some parents (and kids) think is the NBA. Unfortunately sometimes a heavy hand is required to get a message across. Will it work? Who knows. But when I make a decision as a ref I never once think "what about little Johnny/or Suzy".

In my experience no good deed goes unpunished so I just want the crap sorted, fixed and the game to move on. After all it's 8th grade AAU ball.

[BigCat]

Originally Posted by deecee

BigCat I responded to you in regards to "I'd ask you to remember kids don't get to choose their parents"

I'm saying I don't care.

I know Deecee. We all have different life experiences. Mine tells me I'd never punish the kid for the sins of the parent.

[Raymond]

Originally Posted by Adam

Some people want to say not to punish the kids because we do this for the kids. I think that's what he was responding to. I'll admit my reaction is sometimes just as reflexive on that topic.

My main point with that is that I'm not calling a technical foul on the team for Dad's stupidity here. If a league decides to add penalties such as removing the player when a parent gets tossed, I can see valid reasons to support that. I've done enough travel ball in the past to know just how bad these knuckleheads can be.

One thing about punishing the kid as well as the parent, gives the coaches and other team parents major incentive to police each other.

[deecee]

Originally Posted by BadNewsRef

One thing about punishing the kid as well as the parent, gives the coaches and other team parents major incentive to police each other.

This is the main reason. Parents policing themselves at these events works the best. I also stopped doing AAU many years ago. Now I may do 3-4 games per year in the offseason for AAU. Mostly because I really got sick of the stupidity, parents, and coaches.