Looking to older guys for help

[MadCityRef]

1) Been there, done that. More patience, don't be in a hurry.
2) From your description, I think preventative officiating is in order. Warn the pitcher early that he is close to a balk. Easier to balk him early than to do it very late with game on the line. That puts you in the jackpot. When the chirping is directed at me, take care of it. Then get to your partner to discuss the whining and how he will take care of his end. If he won't, well there's not much you can do except taking a coach aside and quietly telling him he needs to pipe down. As you gain experience you'll find the balance of trying to stay out of the way and the moments when you need to take charge to avoid larger problems.

Good luck.