Should I eject or not?!?!

[NM FP Ump]

I haven't been able to visit this site in a while, busy with NFHS and work, but I need some advice.

I had two instances, in two completely different games, where I thought about ejecting a coach or player, but didn't. I still have not tossed anyone out of a game, so I am not sure if my thermostat is set too high. These is my second year (two year gap in between) of NFHS, but have called USSSA for 4 years.

Situation 1: Varsity contest, good team vs. winless team. I am BU, in C position, bases loaded. BR hits ball to F6 (playing back) and throws to F5 covering 3rd. F5 is behind the base (cautious of OB?) and receives the ball in time, but does not touch the base. I wait, call and signal "SAFE". She's visibly upset, but seems to realize she did not touch the base. Okay, next inning, same circumstances, F6 throws to F5 covering 3rd; again she does not touch the base. I signal that she is off the base (sweeping of the hands) and call and signal "SAFE". She comes unglued!
F5: What? I was on the bag!
Me: No ma'am. You didn't have contact with the base.
F5: Yes I did. I was touching the base.
Me: No ma'am, you weren't.
F5: I don’t care if you eject me, I was on the base!!
Me: Coach…. Coach, please control your player.
Should I have said, "Coach….. do you have a substitute for this player?" or did I handle it correctly?

Situation 2: JV contest, good team vs. mediocre team. I am PU, HC from good team (who, coincidentally, is a baseball umpire) notices that the 1st base coach from mediocre team has a scorebook. He asks me, between innings, if this is legal; I tell him, yes sir, it is. Inning continues (mediocre team at bat, 1st base coach in coaches box with scorebook) and HC from good team comes out again to address the scorebook issue. I tell him that it is legal; he says no it's not, new rule in 2008 says that you can't have a scorekeeping device in the coaches box. Then he says, "Learn the rules, blue!" I tell him, "That's enough, coach. We are done with this conversation." And he returns to the dugout. Should I have tossed him? I think not, because he is a new coach and is probably confusing baseball with softball. But he did insult my ability and integrity, so I am thinking I could have tossed him, or at least confined him to the dugout for the remainder of the game.

Your feedback is welcome and, as always, appreciated.