Did I bait the coach...?

[JRutledge]

I do not think you baited him, I think you just allowed more conversation to take place that was unneeded. Either address the comment or whack him. You do not need him to repeat anything if you heard the comment clearly.

Peace

[BigT]

Almost like I need to be more aware and when I know the coach makes a personal comment skip the warning and go for the T in this situation. Been working on my personality and better handling issues with Coaches. And it is all very challenging. I enjoy email referees and truly appreciate the insight I gain and the responses I get here from you guys.

[JetMetFan]

Originally Posted by BigT

Almost like I need to be more aware and when I know the coach makes a personal comment skip the warning and go for the T in this situation. Been working on my personality and better handling issues with Coaches. And it is all very challenging. I enjoy email referees and truly appreciate the insight I gain and the responses I get here from you guys.

Hey, it's all about learning.

One thing about asking him that question: in addition to engaging him too long, it gives him a chance to say something even worse, which could cause the whole thing to escalate. Either T him or go "deaf." It sounds as though you really didn't want to T him in the first place.

[RookieDude]

Originally Posted by BigT

Almost like I need to be more aware and when I know the coach makes a personal comment skip the warning and go for the T in this situation. Been working on my personality and better handling issues with Coaches. And it is all very challenging. I enjoy email referees and truly appreciate the insight I gain and the responses I get here from you guys.

That's great you want to learn and get better...one thing I was told long ago, was to NOT HAVE RABBIT EARS.

[Rich]

Originally Posted by RookieDude

That's great you want to learn and get better...one thing I was told long ago, was to NOT HAVE RABBIT EARS.

Doesn't apply here. The coach was talking TO the official and got personal.

If you ignore this, you are ignoring EVERYTHING. JMO.

[JRutledge]

What the hell is rabbit ears anyway?

So if I say something I am overheard, then I should expect someone to simply ignore their comments? There is a reason even in a locker room you are careful to what you say. If someone hears you say something, they will respond or take action. We really need to get rid of that way of thinking that anything can be said and it should be ignored if not said so everyone can hear it.

I know a coach would write us up if we were in the middle of the court and we were talking in a derogatory matter about a player or coach and then used the "rabbit" ears excuse as our defense for being unprofessional.

Peace

[RookieDude]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

What the hell is rabbit ears anyway?

You really can't figure that out Rut?

Originally Posted by JRutledge

So if I say something I am overheard, then I should expect someone to simply ignore their comments?

huh?

Originally Posted by JRutledge

There is a reason even in a locker room you are careful to what you say. If someone hears you say something, they will respond or take action.

Rut, I gotta tell ya. I have been in a lot of locker rooms (ex-player, ex-PE teacher, current official) and I don't think I have spent a lot of time worrying about someone "responding or taking action" against me, because of something I said. Just be professional.

Originally Posted by JRutledge

We really need to get rid of that way of thinking that anything can be said and it should be ignored if not said so everyone can hear it.

Why? I do it all the time...i.e. player cusses himself for missing a lay-up, nobody else heard it, I may talk to him about it later...but, no T, and I'd bet you would do the same.

Originally Posted by JRutledge

I know a coach would write us up if we were in the middle of the court and we were talking in a derogatory matter about a player or coach and then used the "rabbit" ears excuse as our defense for being unprofessional.
Peace

WTF are you talking about? This has nothing to do with what I was talking about.

[JRutledge]

Originally Posted by RookieDude

You really can't figure that out Rut?

I did not say I could not figure something out, but it is one of these terms that officials use as a cop out to not do their job when things are said.

Originally Posted by RookieDude

Rut, I gotta tell ya. I have been in a lot of locker rooms (ex-player, ex-PE teacher, current official) and I don't think I have spent a lot of time worrying about someone "responding or taking action" against me, because of something I said. Just be professional.

You must not be aware of the story where some officials were having some a conversation after the game in the locker room and then got suspended for what they were saying about the coaches and participants because they were overheard? I believe it was Alaska and the officials lost playoff games. That was probably 4 or 5 years ago, but that until you are in your car or on the phone you never know what people can here. And yes I am very cognizant of the loudness of the conversation or who is around when we are talking. And I am especially concerned when our locker room is right next to one of the team's locker rooms or when we are in a coach's office. I am not talking about something you say that is using bad language, just anything someone can interpret as bias or question what you did on the court, field or diamond.

Originally Posted by RookieDude

YWhy? I do it all the time...i.e. player cusses himself for missing a lay-up, nobody else heard it, I may talk to him about it later...but, no T, and I'd bet you would do the same.


WTF are you talking about? This has nothing to do with what I was talking about.

Obviously you do not understand that what you say will be used against you and it does not matter who you were talking to as an official, so why would the standard change for everyone else?

Peace

[Raymond]

Originally Posted by RookieDude

...
Rut, I gotta tell ya. I have been in a lot of locker rooms (ex-player, ex-PE teacher, current official) and I don't think I have spent a lot of time worrying about someone "responding or taking action" against me, because of something I said. Just be professional.
....

Just like a coach should be professional when making comments about officials, no?

[26 Year Gap]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

What the hell is rabbit ears anyway?

It is how I used to watch TV...eventually, I would add tinfoil.

[JRutledge]

Originally Posted by 26 Year Gap

It is how I used to watch TV...eventually, I would add tinfoil.

Not everyone is as old as you or I, so they have no idea what that means.

Peace

[MD Longhorn]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

What the hell is rabbit ears anyway?

To me, "don't have rabbit ears" means not hunting for a reason to pick a fight. If you have to say, "what did you say???", you're better off not having rabbit ears and ignoring it.

That said, I don't think "rabbit ears" applies to the OP. Coach said something directly to the referee. Asking him, "did you just say what I think you said" is inappropriate if the comment was T-worthy, and I think in the OP, it was. If it's a T, it's a T. If he's been previously well behaved and for whatever reason you want to let it go - let it go. Don't go in between as described in the OP.

[JRutledge]

All of that is subjective even when people say, "Don't go looking for trouble."

My point is if someone says something and you hear it, you can address it. That does not mean that you have to make a big deal about those things, I just think people use that term as a cop out to not deal with situations directly. Sometimes you have to risk trouble to accomplish things.

Peace

[#olderthanilook]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

What the hell is rabbit ears anyway?

So if I say something I am overheard, then I should expect someone to simply ignore their comments? There is a reason even in a locker room you are careful to what you say. If someone hears you say something, they will respond or take action. We really need to get rid of that way of thinking that anything can be said and it should be ignored if not said so everyone can hear it.

I know a coach would write us up if we were in the middle of the court and we were talking in a derogatory matter about a player or coach and then used the "rabbit" ears excuse as our defense for being unprofessional.

Peace

Exactly.

We are to act and be professional even when everyone else in the venue is not acting professional. That includes checking what comes out of our mouths in the form of words (includes eye rolling and sarcastic/baiting body language).

[RookieDude]

Originally Posted by #olderthanilook

Exactly.

We are to act and be professional even when everyone else in the venue is not acting professional. That includes checking what comes out of our mouths in the form of words (includes eye rolling and sarcastic/baiting body language).

Wow...I really do like this!!!

...can I borrow this from you?