Appropriateness

[MD Longhorn]

Originally Posted by bainsey

The problem is, if you keep the tidbit to yourself, that official loses an opportunity to improve. Personally, I'd rather have an uncomfortable moment of feedback than have the constructive critic keep it to himself.

From your POV, this makes sense... but from most people's own point of view, what they see or know is right - and if it differs from someone else - then that someone else is wrong. And, at the same time, the guy you're talking to is looking at it the same way. Unless you know someone's a green rookie, it's highly likely you're not going to be received well.

Consider this. I was on the field of a softball game about 4 months ago. After the game another uninvolved umpire informed me that I'd missed a call when a pitch struck a girl on the hands. Said umpire approached us calmly and nicely and just as was suggested above told us we did a great job. He then informed partner and I that "the hands are part of the bat", and the ball that hit the girl should have been ruled a foul ball. He then went on to commisserate with us that it's a tough call to make when a girl is crying over it, but sometimes we get paid to make the hard decisions.

From HIS point of view, he was right, and he was "helping" us by imparting his wisdom. Now I'm sure YOU would never approach an unknown official with something you weren't right about ... but don't we all think we're right most of the time?

[bainsey]

Originally Posted by mbcrowder

Now I'm sure YOU would never approach an unknown official with something you weren't right about ... but don't we all think we're right most of the time?

Perhaps, but if you keep it to yourself, I don't learn anything. If you pass along your wisdom, I likely will cease getting it wrong. There's always a chance that I saw something differently than the viewpoint passed to me, but those moments you can take in stride.

The thing I've come to learn is that the post-game "good game" or "nice job" comments from your partner are quite meaningless. What they're basically saying is, "we got through that one," but these friendly offerings are no evaluation of your work.

Instead, we generally have to wait until the end of the season to get the truth, in the form of our evaluations. This is where you want to yell, "where was THIS information two months ago?!" You can't take corrective action on information withheld, and that's the most frustrating part of it all.

[BillyMac]

Originally Posted by bainsey

Perhaps, but if you keep it to yourself, I don't learn anything. If you pass along your wisdom, I likely will cease getting it wrong. There's always a chance that I saw something differently than the viewpoint passed to me, but those moments you can take in stride. The thing I've come to learn is that the post-game "good game" or "nice job" comments from your partner are quite meaningless. What they're basically saying is, "we got through that one," but these friendly offerings are no evaluation of your work. Instead, we generally have to wait until the end of the season to get the truth, in the form of our evaluations. This is where you want to yell, "where was this information two months ago?!" You can't take corrective action on information withheld, and that's the most frustrating part of it all.

I had the same frustration a few years ago, but my attitude has changed. Now I don't passively wait for advice or constructive criticism. Instead I'm proactive and seek out constructive criticism. Any time anybody sees me work, even the junior varsity officials who stay for the first half of my varsity game, I always ask, "So, what did you see?". Nobody escapes getting this question asked of them. Some respond. Some don't. How does that Serenity Prayer go? Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.

[Jurassic Referee]

Originally Posted by BillyMac

How does that Serenity Prayer go?

Picture yourself near a stream. Birds are softly chirping in the crisp, cool mountain air. Nothing can bother you here. No one knows this secret place. You are in total seclusion from the place called "the world". The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of serenity. The water is clear. It is so clear that you can easily make out the face of the person you're holding under the water.


Add ten points if it's Chseagle.

[BillyMac]

Originally Posted by Jurassic Referee

Picture yourself near a stream. Birds are softly chirping in the crisp, cool mountain air. Nothing can bother you here. No one knows this secret place. You are in total seclusion from the place called "the world". The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of serenity. The water is clear.

YouTube - Seinfeld - Serenity Now Montage

[bob jenkins]

Originally Posted by bainsey

The thing I've come to learn is that the post-game "good game" or "nice job" comments from your partner are quite meaningless. What they're basically saying is, "we got through that one," but these friendly offerings are no evaluation of your work.

Agreed, if it's your partner. I thought the OP was (from the standpoint of the official working the game) "just some random guy from the stands who claims to be an official."

(and I think we've al had them come out to try to give us advice)