Hilarious (to me anyway) post-game exchange

[Ref_in_Alberta]

Heard a good one from a partner to a fan after the fan's team lost by 25...

Fan: You guys were terrible...
Partner: Yeah well we may be terrible but at least not 25 points terrible.

I nearly had gatoraide come out my nose on that one...

[Mark Padgett]

Originally Posted by Ref_in_Alberta

Heard a good one from a partner to a fan after the fan's team lost by 25...

Fan: You guys were terrible...
Partner: Yeah well we may be terrible but at least not 25 points terrible.

I nearly had gatoraide come out my nose on that one...

After his team lost by 33 points, I had a coach tell me that my partner and I were "terrible". I told him that perhaps he was right, so to make up for it, we'd give his team 30 points. Then I said, "Oh wait - YOU STILL LOSE!" Then I just walked away and left him with his jaw wide open.

[Rita C]

Originally Posted by Juulie Downs

oh, my gosh, Mark, warm fuzzies from you, instead of wicked coach baiting? I suspected, when I saw snow on my lawn this morning, that he!! really was freezing over, but now I'm without a doubt!!

We had snow here too. Now I know why.

Rita

[w_sohl]

Show up to do my game in Vincennes, Indiana. Gym Rats if any of you are familiar. Anyway, my partner doesn't show so I am doing the game by myself. Fans sitting at one end of the court. Dad keeps yelling at me about how horrible I am. Finally I say to myself, "If he says one more word I am going to respond!" Naturally he does, I look at him and say in these exact words, "I have an extra jersey in my bag if you want to get off your happy azz and help me!" He started to say something and the gf/wife sitting behind him covered his mouth. Not a word the rest of the game.

I did have one I wanted to use, but it was extremely inappropriate. Dad yelling at me in a girls varsity game at Gibson Southern in Fort Branch, IN. Closely guarded, I'm counting and he keeps yelling, "That's not six feet, that's ten!" I wanted so badly to yell up to him in the stands, "I bet that's what you tell your wife!" I did not though. My partners at the half thought it was extremly funny though.

[grunewar]

B13/15 Semi-Final Rec League game last night. Back and forth. 100 spectators. MS sized gym. Very tense, close, emotional game with a lot of lead changes. Nerves being shown by the boys toward the end.....

Early in the 4th qtr Green #10 was at the line shooting the second of two foul shots. The MS gym was church quiet and one of the parents "passed gas" LOUD! It was unreal. Didn't know who exactly the "offending party" was, but as the T on that side, I had my suspicions. The "suspected dad" just sat there without expression.

The gym howled (teenagers and f@rts?, cmon!). The shooter at the line almost fell off the line. In hind-sight, we should have "blown the play dead," retrieved the ball, and started the foul shot over. The shooter "bricked it."

I mean, this was LOUD!

[Cleefy]

One match I'll always remember was midway through last year at a Squad Tournament (rep basketball for local towns, for you Americans).

Spectator is yelling off her nut at my partner and I, and the smartarse in me (as always actually), got the better of me. I turned to her, and said back, quite loudly "Hey, I don't yell at you when you're working at McDonalds". I embarrassed her quite a bit, and she kept it shut for the rest of the match.

Another exchange I had last night in our domestic competition comes to mind here too - father says "C'mon ref, you gotta make a call there" to which I reply "If you want to read the rules and tell me what call should have been made, go for it" he was quick to blurt out "A charge would have been nice"... this is the point where I should have put a lid on it, but I just had to say "No, your not listening to me - I said read the rules first"

I guess I really should start to control myself - its going to get me into trouble; but gosh, when a clueless parent gets going, responding is just so tempting.

[fullor30]

Originally Posted by Mark Padgett

Here's the nicest thing a fan ever did for me. I'm not posting this to toot my own horn, just to relate the story. Early last rec season, I was entering the MS gym down the street from my house to work my games. We wear our uniforms to these games. An elderly couple was entering at the same time and the man was holding the door open for his wife. I reached to hold the door for him. He looked at my jersey (my jacket was open in front) and said that I should go first because I was "more important" than him. I looked at him and asked him if he was a veteran of the armed forces. He said yes. I then told him he was more important and he should go through first. He smiled and said thank you. I said, "No, thank you."

The following week, he and his wife came to the gym again. I guess they had a grandchild playing. She came up to me with a paper plate full of homemade cookies and insisted I take them. She said it was for making her husband feel so special the previous week. Not wanting to hurt her feelings, I accepted the cookies. I took them home with me after my games and later that day donated them to a shelter for battered women near my house. The executive director there is a friend of mine and I told her the story. She was very appreciative and when I saw the wife a few weeks later, I told her what I did. She was extremely happy and wound up baking a few dozen more cookies for the shelter.

Herb Padgett and the Tijuana brass band..........

[grunewar]

Originally Posted by Cleefy

One match I'll always remember was midway through last year at a Squad Tournament (rep basketball for local towns, for you Americans).

Spectator is yelling off her nut at my partner and I, and the smartarse in me (as always actually), got the better of me. I turned to her, and said back, quite loudly "Hey, I don't yell at you when you're working at McDonalds". I embarrassed her quite a bit, and she kept it shut for the rest of the match.

Another exchange I had last night in our domestic competition comes to mind here too - father says "C'mon ref, you gotta make a call there" to which I reply "If you want to read the rules and tell me what call should have been made, go for it" he was quick to blurt out "A charge would have been nice"... this is the point where I should have put a lid on it, but I just had to say "No, your not listening to me - I said read the rules first"

I guess I really should start to control myself - its going to get me into trouble; but gosh, when a clueless parent gets going, responding is just so tempting.

Wow, great stuff! A Mark Padgett down under!

[jearef]

It's nice to see that I'm not the only official who fires back at the fans from time to time. My most recent was last night. Crew arrives at the gym an hour and 15 minutes prior to game time, only to learn that the J.V. officials had not appeared. Coach pleads with us to work the J.V. game, which is now 30 minutes behind schedule. One partner tells him that his knees won't make it through two games; the other says his back won't make it (both in their mid-50's). I tell coach that I'll do it alone (52 with an artificial hip; I'm the one who REALLY needs the warm-up time). Anyway, I do the J.V. game by myself. No incidents except for a tech on a kid who pushes another kid on a dead ball.

Now go on to the varsity. Visitors are much better, and are up 25 as time is running out in the first half. Home #12 jumps to throw a pass, comes down "funny" on his leg, and twists his knee. Time expires. As we are leaving, elderly fan (#12's grandfather) starts blasting us. I always feel badly when a kid gets hurt, and when grandpa starts to pile on. . .let's just say I had heard enough. I stop, go back toward the bleachers, and look up at him. "I'm sorry, sir, I didn't quite hear that. Is there something you'd like to say?" Silence. "C'mon sir, you can't embarrass yourself more than you already have. Speak up, and give me a reason to have this nice officer escort you to the parking lot." More silence. I swear, I was so angry that if the guy had been standing in front of me, I might have punched him. I wish I could control myself better in those situations.

One day, fans are going to realize that they are going to destroy the game. Officials will tire of the abuse, and there will be no one left to work the games. Just once, I'd love to take my crew and walk off the floor when the fans are going over the line. But that wouldn't be fair to the kids, and the game is about them. I can still dream, however. . . .

[grunewar]

Jearef - you woulda punched a grandpa? Yikes!

PS - kudos for stepping up and working the JV game alone!

[jearef]

Originally Posted by grunewar

Jearef - you woulda punched a grandpa? Yikes!

I'd have dropped him like a bad habit. Not your proverbial grandpa, as in grey hair, no teeth, a cane, etc. This guy was late 50's, early 60's. No question it would have been the absolute wrong thing to do, and likely would have ruined my officiating career. I just can't remember the last time I was that angry.

[fullor30]

Originally Posted by jearef

It's nice to see that I'm not the only official who fires back at the fans from time to time. My most recent was last night. Crew arrives at the gym an hour and 15 minutes prior to game time, only to learn that the J.V. officials had not appeared. Coach pleads with us to work the J.V. game, which is now 30 minutes behind schedule. One partner tells him that his knees won't make it through two games; the other says his back won't make it (both in their mid-50's). I tell coach that I'll do it alone (52 with an artificial hip; I'm the one who REALLY needs the warm-up time). Anyway, I do the J.V. game by myself. No incidents except for a tech on a kid who pushes another kid on a dead ball.

Now go on to the varsity. Visitors are much better, and are up 25 as time is running out in the first half. Home #12 jumps to throw a pass, comes down "funny" on his leg, and twists his knee. Time expires. As we are leaving, elderly fan (#12's grandfather) starts blasting us. I always feel badly when a kid gets hurt, and when grandpa starts to pile on. . .let's just say I had heard enough. I stop, go back toward the bleachers, and look up at him. "I'm sorry, sir, I didn't quite hear that. Is there something you'd like to say?" Silence. "C'mon sir, you can't embarrass yourself more than you already have. Speak up, and give me a reason to have this nice officer escort you to the parking lot." More silence. I swear, I was so angry that if the guy had been standing in front of me, I might have punched him. I wish I could control myself better in those situations.

One day, fans are going to realize that they are going to destroy the game. Officials will tire of the abuse, and there will be no one left to work the games. Just once, I'd love to take my crew and walk off the floor when the fans are going over the line. But that wouldn't be fair to the kids, and the game is about them. I can still dream, however. . . .

Just me, I can't believe your partners didn't jump in.

[fullor30]

Originally Posted by Cleefy

One match I'll always remember was midway through last year at a Squad Tournament (rep basketball for local towns, for you Americans).

Spectator is yelling off her nut at my partner and I, and the smartarse in me (as always actually), got the better of me. I turned to her, and said back, quite loudly "Hey, I don't yell at you when you're working at McDonalds". I embarrassed her quite a bit, and she kept it shut for the rest of the match. Another exchange I had last night in our domestic competition comes to mind here too - father says "C'mon ref, you gotta make a call there" to which I reply "If you want to read the rules and tell me what call should have been made, go for it" he was quick to blurt out "A charge would have been nice"... this is the point where I should have put a lid on it, but I just had to say "No, your not listening to me - I said read the rules first"

I guess I really should start to control myself - its going to get me into trouble; but gosh, when a clueless parent gets going, responding is just so tempting.

[Mark Padgett]

Originally Posted by grunewar

Wow, great stuff! A Mark Padgett down under!

What do Australians use to buy chess sets? A check, mate.

[Mark Padgett]

Originally Posted by jearef

Not your proverbial grandpa, as in grey hair, no teeth, a cane, etc.

Hey - you've been looking at my picture again.