Communicating with Coaches

[bbcoach7]

Originally Posted by lmeadski

I am a more frequent reader than poster here. In many of the threads I see refs referencing their comments to/with coaches. Some of you clearly call the game with minimal interaction while others are sarcastic, especially with the belligerent coaches (and maybe it's just what you'd like to say...).
Thanks.

I like it when during pre-game the officials make a point to initiate communication with me. There's just something that happens when you actually look someone in the eyes, shake hands and introduce yourself. It fosters some respect. I'm way less likely to make an innapropriate comment to "Jim" who I just had a pleasant moment with in pre-game than I am with someone who doesn't bother, or worse seems to assume through body language that it's going to be an contentious relationship.

Certainly I don't expect it. I believe what this topic really is about is communication skills, and ultimately leadership.

[Chess Ref]

Originally Posted by bbcoach7

I like it when during pre-game the officials make a point to initiate communication with me. There's just something that happens when you actually look someone in the eyes, shake hands and introduce yourself. It fosters some respect. I'm way less likely to make an innapropriate comment to "Jim" who I just had a pleasant moment with in pre-game than I am with someone who doesn't bother, or worse seems to assume through body language that it's going to be an contentious relationship.

Certainly I don't expect it. I believe what this topic really is about is communication skills, and ultimately leadership.

I always intoduce myself. I keep my comments pre-game and during the game short and professional.

I'm way less likely to give a T to a coach who doesn't say anything inappropriate then one who does.

[CoachP]

We normally have the same 2 officials do the boys varsity after we play the girls varsity....so they are at the division line watching the boys warmup by the time I am done with our girls in the locker room. I at a minimum shake hands and say thanks.

I love the personable "humor type" and the "business like" styles I see from each pair of officials we get. I adapt to them just as the girls also adapt to their "types" of calls.

Last week our AD was outta town so I ended announcing the starters. I then said please stand for the national anthem and handed the mic to Mr. Ref. (An official doing our game I have known for 14-15 years.) His partner was still laughing trying to do the toss.

[beachbum]

The biggest problem is that there is not alot of time to talk when the game is on. I am trying to focus on my job and the coach is trying to ask a question or YELL. Most coaches try to talk while the ball is in play. They don't want to talk during a time out as it is the time they have with their players.

I have been trying to figure out how to communicate with a coach when there is action and he is asking questions. Most of the time he is just venting anyways. It seems best the best time is during a foul shot.

[Chess Ref]

Originally Posted by beachbum

The biggest problem is that there is not alot of time to talk when the game is on. I am trying to focus on my job and the coach is trying to ask a question or YELL. Most coaches try to talk while the ball is in play. They don't want to talk during a time out as it is the time they have with their players.

I have been trying to figure out how to communicate with a coach when there is action and he is asking questions. Most of the time he is just venting anyways. It seems best the best time is during a foul shot.

Keep it short. It's like a set of skills. You'll figure it out eventually-hopefully sooner then later. Took me some time of concentrated energy to acquire the short and sweet answer skill but I got it now. Practice it in ,maybe non violatile times.

If venting appropriately I nod and act interested in what they're saying.

If yelling....paraphrased " No yelling at us tonight."

Coach then goes "blah blah blah."

I repeat " No yelling at us tonight"

Next time I take care of it.

Last night GV coach starts the yelling stuff at the tip , I cruise her , give her the spiel. Next time down she starts the yelling again. No brainer . Tweet T.As I'm walking away from table I hear Assistant tell her " I told you homes doesn't play." For a white guy from the burbs I was tickled pink that I'm a homes. She stopped yelling . There was 7.13 on the clock, 1st quarter.

[JRutledge]

Originally Posted by fullor30

There is a big difference between sarcasm and humor. I recommend humor. Being sarcastic with a belligerent coach will gain you nothing, you've jumped into his/her sandbox. I like to try a little humor, if it doesn't work, I'm all business as they're not in the mood for any banter. If they cross the line, you know what to do.

I disagree because I use sarcasm a lot when I feel it is appropriate and it works. It accomplishes the thing I want them to do, see how ridiculous their statements are. It is better to use sarcasm then it is to give a T if you do not hear from them anymore. It is about the person delivering the comments not the words all by itself.

Peace

Originally Posted by FrankHtown

I said "Coach, I'm 75 feet away as you are. I have a partner 10 feet away from the play. I'm not going to make a call." He says " Ok.........but how about if you were 74 feet away??"

He must be one of those idiots who seriously listens to the commentators on TV doing football, when those idiots say taking a delay of the game penalty pushes the FG team back a few more yards for a better angle on the goal posts, only coach is seriously directionally impaired in this situation.

[BillyMac]

Originally Posted by mbyron

Most of you mean to use 'facetious' and not 'sarcastic', unless you're out to hurt people's feelings with your irony.

Facetious
1 : joking or jesting often inappropriately : 2 : meant to be humorous or funny : not serious

Sarcasm
1: a sharp and often satirical or ironic utterance designed to cut or give pain
2: a mode of satirical wit depending for its effect on bitter, caustic, and often ironic language that is usually directed against an individual

Irony
1: a pretense of ignorance and of willingness to learn from another assumed in order to make the other's false conceptions conspicuous by adroit questioning —called also Socratic irony
2 a: the use of words to express something other than and especially the opposite of the literal meaning
b: a usually humorous or sardonic literary style or form characterized by irony
c: an ironic expression or utterance
3 a (1): incongruity between the actual result of a sequence of events and the normal or expected result
(2): an event or result marked by such incongruity
b: incongruity between a situation developed in a drama and the accompanying words or actions that is understood by the audience but not by the characters in the play —called also dramatic irony tragic irony

[BillyMac]

Catholic middle school games:

Saturday: Two teams, both with blue jerseys, and blue shorts. One team wore pinnies over their jerseys. During a break, I bantered with some fans, who have come to know me over the years. I announce to them, "I got twenty dollars that says the team with the blue shorts will win". I got a good laugh.

Sunday: Two teams, both named Saint Mary, one team in home whites, the other in road blue. Again, I'm talking to some fans, again, who have come to know me over the years. I figure that I can be funny two days in a row, so I decided to announce that I had twenty dollars that says Saint Mary would win, but, for some reason, maybe old age, it comes out, "I got twenty dollars that says the blue team will win". They all look at me like I was nuts. I immediately tried my attempt at humor again, this time the correct way, but also adding what happened the day before, and how I screwed up the joke. They all laughed, but not at my joke, at me. At least I got the laugh I was looking for.