Very inappropriate comments from fans and how to address

[cardinalfan]

A few years ago, a small rural school. Older man in overalls on the front row tells me I need to "help my boy", speaking of one of my partners... a young black man.
At halftime, my partner asked me why I let him make a racial comment like that. I was a little embarrassed that I had taken it to mean he was young and inexperienced.
Dead ball in the second half. I'm in C, right in front of the old man. This time he says, "You should know better than to bring one of them with you".
Told the school administrator I wanted him gone.
He got a round of applause as he left... I got hammered the rest of the night... it was worth it.

[grunewar]

As I read these posts I just find it utterly incredible that we are even talking about these types of situations in 2009! Amazing, in a sad way. I hope I never have to deal with it. But, as always, the Forum has given me food for thought in case I do.

[IREFU2]

Originally Posted by grunewar

As I read these posts I just find it utterly incredible that we are even talking about these types of situations in 2009! Amazing, in a sad way. I hope I never have to deal with it. But, as always, the Forum has given me food for thought in case I do.

Why?

[JugglingReferee]

Originally Posted by IREFU2

Why?

The accumulation of three steps forward, one step back is in fact progress, but often the one step back is what makes the news.

Picture yourself as a historian from 400 years into the future, looking back at the period of time of your lifetime (and earlier).

[IREFU2]

Originally Posted by JugglingReferee

The accumulation of three steps forward, one step back is in fact progress, but often the one step back is what makes the news.

Picture yourself as a historian from 400 years into the future, looking back at the period of time of your lifetime (and earlier).

I would think that such information is a refresher course for those who may have forgotten. You always need the past, look back and see where you have came from. Not dwelling in the past, but reflecting!!!!

[ref2coach]

The most racist situation I have ever been in is working an inner city JV game. I was one of maybe 10 white people in the gym. I was called everything but a white Man. Did my Black partner stand up for me? Did the Black Administrator, Coaches or Security Officer not hear what was being said?

I have worked many times in the rural areas that our association covers with a single Black official in our 3 man crew. Never has there been any crowd activity directed at my Black partner like what I have experienced working inner city schools.

Where is it written that racism is only 1 way?

[26 Year Gap]

Originally Posted by ref2coach

The most racist situation I have ever been in is working an inner city JV game. I was one of maybe 10 white people in the gym. I was called everything but a white Man. Did my Black partner stand up for me? Did the Black Administrator, Coaches or Security Officer not hear what was being said?

I have worked many times in the rural areas that our association covers with a single Black official in our 3 man crew. Never has there been any crowd activity directed at my Black partner like what I have experienced working inner city schools.

Where is it written that racism is only 1 way?

Don't think anyone said it was. Someone gave some poor examples as a basis of comparison, but there is nothing different in what you posted from what the OP posted.

[Adam]

Originally Posted by ref2coach

The most racist situation I have ever been in is working an inner city JV game. I was one of maybe 10 white people in the gym. I was called everything but a white Man. Did my Black partner stand up for me? Did the Black Administrator, Coaches or Security Officer not hear what was being said?

I have worked many times in the rural areas that our association covers with a single Black official in our 3 man crew. Never has there been any crowd activity directed at my Black partner like what I have experienced working inner city schools.

Where is it written that racism is only 1 way?

Nowhere on this board.

[Raymond]

Originally Posted by ref2coach

Where is it written that racism is only 1 way?

Why are you asking us? Where did someone say racism is one way?

[Juulie Downs]

Originally Posted by ref2coach

The most racist situation I have ever been in is working an inner city JV game. I was one of maybe 10 white people in the gym. I was called everything but a white Man. Did my Black partner stand up for me? Did the Black Administrator, Coaches or Security Officer not hear what was being said?

I have worked many times in the rural areas that our association covers with a single Black official in our 3 man crew. Never has there been any crowd activity directed at my Black partner like what I have experienced working inner city schools.

Where is it written that racism is only 1 way?

I certainly have seen it go both ways. I tossed a black kid one time for calling a white opponent a very insulting racial epithet. Black coach didn't have a problem with it!

[JRutledge]

Originally Posted by ref2coach

The most racist situation I have ever been in is working an inner city JV game. I was one of maybe 10 white people in the gym. I was called everything but a white Man. Did my Black partner stand up for me? Did the Black Administrator, Coaches or Security Officer not hear what was being said?

I have worked many times in the rural areas that our association covers with a single Black official in our 3 man crew. Never has there been any crowd activity directed at my Black partner like what I have experienced working inner city schools.

Where is it written that racism is only 1 way?

If no one else will say it, I will say it. You were called a white man and you were offended? Really??

I get identified all the time by my race and I do not get upset, nor do I consider the reality of that identification as racist (because it has nothing to do with racism BTW). It is not the identification that is problem; it is a slur or a stereotype that is offensive.

And I bet that most people here that are white, it they choose to work in places that did not look like them, they would pass. I do not have that choice and I live in a highly racially mixed area where most of the people of color in the state lives and if I am assigned in a place where only people of a certain race that look likes me takes place, it is rather rare. A vast majority of time of my games I am just about the only Black person in the gym (players, coaches, fans and administrators).

Peace

[JugglingReferee]

Originally Posted by ref2coach

I was called everything but a white Man.

Originally Posted by JRutledge

If no one else will say it, I will say it. You were called a white man and you were offended? Really??

I get identified all the time by my race and I do not get upset, nor do I consider the reality of that identification as racist (because it has nothing to do with racism BTW). It is not the identification that is problem; it is a slur or a stereotype that is offensive.

And I bet that most people here that are white, it they choose to work in places that did not look like them, they would pass. I do not have that choice and I live in a highly racially mixed area where most of the people of color in the state lives and if I am assigned in a place where only people of a certain race that look likes me takes place, it is rather rare. A vast majority of time of my games I am just about the only Black person in the gym (players, coaches, fans and administrators).

Peace

Do you need the benefit of the doubt?

[JRutledge]

What was he called? I do not know too many racial slurs that identify white people that are widely considered offensive.

What, did they call him stupid, terrible, "you are not from here," or any number of things and that is boiled down to racism? At least the person in the OP used the exact term that he was called. That word (that was used) is not simply a name being called that we all have been through as officials. That identified nothing else but his races. And if he was called names, get in line; it happens to all of us on the court in some capacity.

Peace

[just another ref]

Originally Posted by cardinalfan

A few years ago, a small rural school. Older man in overalls on the front row tells me I need to "help my boy", speaking of one of my partners... a young black man.
At halftime, my partner asked me why I let him make a racial comment like that. I was a little embarrassed that I had taken it to mean he was young and inexperienced.

I don't blame you for not assuming the worst. Years ago around here most schools got just whoever to call jr. high games, basically anyone who would put on a whistle, with no affiliation with any officiating group. One year I was the senior member of a team at age twenty-something, frequently accompanied by a protege who was about nineteen at the time. I think at first fans honestly took a "He doesn't know any better approach," to the kid. I told my young partner I would be glad when he got old enough that people would give him his own criticism instead of piling it all on me. It was a gradual process. After reading me a list of my own shortcomings on the way out one night, one lady added a postscript: "And your boy was bad, too!"
For the record, all parties involved in the story are white.

Many fans truly know no prejudice when it comes to basketball officials.

"There is no racial bigotry here............ Here you are all equally worthless."**


**Gunnery Sergeant Hartman Full Metal Jacket

[Adam]

Originally Posted by cardinalfan

A few years ago, a small rural school. Older man in overalls on the front row tells me I need to "help my boy", speaking of one of my partners... a young black man.
At halftime, my partner asked me why I let him make a racial comment like that. I was a little embarrassed that I had taken it to mean he was young and inexperienced.

I was in basic training before I found out "boy" was an epithet. I grew up in a small farm town in the middle of Iowa; our only minorities were a Laotian family. It wasn't that I used the term ignorantly, I had never even heard it used in that way.

One guy (a black guy from Montgomery, AL) in our flight took offense when another guy called him a boy (the initial comment may have been innocent, I don't know). After things calmed down a bit, I learned a lesson on southern racial history.