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Fri Feb 07, 2003, 02:25pm
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In our BJV game the other night there wasn't any place to put our jackets so we had to leave them at the table. At the end of a very close game the teams shake hands near the table while my partner and I wait around mid-court. The coaches shake our hands and the place is emtyping.
Right behind one of the coaches is a father who comes over and says "I'm sorry I was yelling so loudly at you guys, etc.". Neither my partner nor I heard him but we said we appreciated his comment. As we are walking to our cars the same father is saying good bye to his son who is taking the team bus to the school. I had noticed this player exhibiting extraordinary sportsmanship during the game and had told him so just prior to the end of the game. Best sportsmanship of the season, by far. The father and I are walking to our cars, nearly parallel and I told him how terrific his kid had been. The father said he really appreciated me saying that and that it made him feel good. I got to wondering if even though this was a non-threatening environment I should not have said anything to avoid it being seen by someone else and misconstrued. This was my first time with this team and I couldn't pick the player out of a police lineup. But should I avoid all interaction? Thanks 
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Fri Feb 07, 2003, 02:30pm
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Quote:
Life's short. Enjoy the moment.
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Fri Feb 07, 2003, 02:37pm
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Agree with Mick
Some may deem it unprofessional, that the other team may perceive it a favortism, but as long as you aren't walking with your arms around each other, I'm sure that parent or that player will appreciate being recognized for their effort, and will remember your comments for a long while.
Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative.
__________________
Trust your partners, but trust yourself more. Training, experience and intuition are your currency.
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Fri Feb 07, 2003, 02:52pm
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NO! Don't avoid those types of interaction.
I doubt there is a parent on the face of the earth that would not "bust a button" hearing a stranger compliment his/her child (and there is nobody stranger than an official  ). Believe me, the "criticsm" a child receives always makes it to Mom and Dad...you probably made that Dad's night and I would bet the farm his son and many others heard about your comment as well.
__________________
I didn't say it was your fault...I said I was going to blame you.
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Fri Feb 07, 2003, 02:58pm
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Kids and adults that exhibit really good sportsmanship SHOULD be acknowledged. We certainly let them know when they hit the other end of the spectrum.
You did a good thing. Maybe more will follow this player's example. People who have a problem with what you did are, to coin a phrase used here before, are giblet-heads.
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Fri Feb 07, 2003, 03:29pm
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I worked a JV game last season where both teams demonstrated outstanding sportsmanship and fine behavior throughout the contest. At the end of the game my partner and I approached each head coach to compliment them and we asked them to tell their players how impressed we were by them.
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Fri Feb 07, 2003, 09:54pm
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Here in Florida, they actually give us a form to fax into the state when we see extrodinarily good sportsmanship.
As has already been stated too much negative makes it public, I'm sure the dad appreciated what you had to say.
__________________
If it's not one thing -- it's your Mother.
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Sat Feb 08, 2003, 12:51am
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...these types of situations are really the exception, and not the rule in our chosen profession, so when they do occur, acknowledge them so that they know that the folks involved realize that we DO appreciate the fact that some good ol values and manners are not only appreciated, but NOTED!
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Sat Feb 08, 2003, 12:50pm
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Actually, I have on occasion, written letters to principals when a team has exibited particularly good sportsmanship. It has been well received on each occasion.
I think that given the time and effort that we expend pointing out and penalizing participants for poor sportsmanship, we should never miss the opportunity to commend good sportsmanship when we see it. [Edited by Tom Cook on Feb 8th, 2003 at 11:53 AM]
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Sat Feb 08, 2003, 02:13pm
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I agree totally with what everyone said here and had a great experience myself.At halftime of boys Var. the coach of the team who is behind approaches me.I think oh no here we go you aren't calling them for over the back blah,blah,blah.No the coach said are any of my kids saying anything to you cause I want to know.I said thanks coach other than one minor thing they have been great.That made my day and we had a incident free great second half.Also his team made a strong come back even though they were outmanned.
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