Sportsmanship speech

[derwil]

I'll motion towards my partner and say "no coach, HE's the worst official in the world. I came in second place again".

[Rich]

"Aww, coach, and to think you're my second favorite coach in the world."

"Second favorite?"

"Everyone else is tied for first."

[Rufus]

This announcement kind of cracks me up too. I did two JV games and hung around for the V games afterward. Not 2 minutes after the speech, the local edition of the Cameron crazies were chanting "Take his whistle" and "I'm blind, I'm deaf, I wanna be a ref!" The AD and principal were cracking up at their obviously witty and inventive student body.

On the plus side my kids really got a kick out of the "I'm blind" one.

[Rich]

"Nuts and bolts, nuts and bolts, we got screwed."

"Elevator, elevator, we got the shaft."

I have some partners that are bothered by these things and I have to fight not to laugh, myself. When I was in high school, I was one of the kids chanting, so I remember, even though it's not exactly recent history.

[Ignats75]

My personal favorite:

"Its Hard to Blow the Whistle when you $uk."