dealing with coaches

[Adam]

General rule: Answer questions and ignore commentary. This "rule" only works about 90% of the time, though.

[FrankHtown]

One thing I'm trying very hard NOT do this year is get defensive when a coach complains. I'll listen, and tell them what I saw. At some point, it may come down to "Coach, on this one, we may have to agree to disagree."

I find some of the "canned" phrases work very well: "Coach, I'm looking for that at both ends" "Coach, I think I had a pretty good angle on that call." "Coach, you may be right. I'll work harder to get a better look at it next time."

I find a lot of times they just want to vent, and if you can keep your cool, it prevents the discussion from escalating.

But you have to tailor it to your disposition. It has taken me a long time to NOT get defensive, and feel comfortable communicating with coaches.

But I have found "don't ignore them" is very good advice.

[Adam]

My first game of the season, I'm T with the visitor's HC in my pocket, first half. Home's pg is in the midst of a crowd and "probably" double dribbles. I didn't have a clear view due to the crowd.

Coach: "She double dribbled. That was a...."
Me: "I missed it."
Coach, smiling: "Okay."

It helped he was winning handily.

[just another ref]

Originally Posted by Snaqwells

My first game of the season, I'm T with the visitor's HC in my pocket, first half. Home's pg is in the midst of a crowd and "probably" double dribbles. I didn't have a clear view due to the crowd.

Coach: "She double dribbled. That was a...."
Me: "I missed it."
Coach, smiling: "Okay."

I like this. Lets the coach know that you have no illusions of your own infallibility. I have a sign language version of the same thing. A nod. Pat myself on the chest. A slight shrug. Translation: My bad, maybe.

[BBall_Junkie]

Do you also have sign language for them when they complain and you are100% correct you got the call/ no call correct???

[Mark Padgett]

Originally Posted by BBall_Junkie

Do you also have sign language for them when they complain and you are100% correct you got the call/ no call correct???

Yes, it's a very simple gesture involving only one finger - and you can use either hand. In fact, doing it with both hands adds to the meaning.

[JRutledge]

Also another factor is your physicality as an official. The size, race, body type and gender can all play a role in how you are treated and how they react to you as an official. This is not something often talked about, but there is an underlining factor depending on who you are dealing with.

The bottom line we are in the people business and people react to different people for all kinds of different reasons. And what works for me might not work for you based on experience or reputation. The more you are seen the more coaches will respect you or show a lack of respect based on what you have done. This is why working games and getting experience is should really be your focus and you will learn how to talk to coaches better as time goes on.

Peace

[grunewar]

Originally Posted by Mark Padgett

Yes, it's a very simple gesture involving only one finger - and you can use either hand. In fact, doing it with both hands adds to the meaning.

Oh, I get it, a jump ball!

[shishstripes]

I agree with OHBB, being able to succinctly use rule terminology and do it in a confident manner. Had a coach wanting a 3-second violation after a shot bounced off the rim and both teams were going for the ball near the side line away from both of us. "Coach there's no team control on a shot and until a member of his team gets control, there is no 3-second count." What else could he say?

Some coaches will take the explanation and the ones that don't and want to keep complaining start to fall on deaf ears. Know your rules and explain them with confidence.

[just another ref]

Originally Posted by shishstripes

I agree with OHBB, being able to succinctly use rule terminology and do it in a confident manner. Had a coach wanting a 3-second violation after a shot bounced off the rim and both teams were going for the ball near the side line away from both of us. "Coach there's no team control on a shot and until a member of his team gets control, there is no 3-second count." What else could he say?

Some coaches will take the explanation and the ones that don't and want to keep complaining start to fall on deaf ears. Know your rules and explain them with confidence.

And some coaches "accept" the explanation because they don't know what you just said. The year the team control rule went into effect, we had a foul by the offense during a throw-in.

Me: Blue, 14, push, one and one.

Coach: (sarcastically) So you're gonna shoot on the offensive foul?

Me: Coach, there is no team control during a throw-in.

His mouth opened..........and not another word came out. My idea at the time was that the phrase team control was foreign to him.

Originally Posted by just another ref

His mouth opened..........and not another word came out. My idea at the time was that the phrase team control was foreign to him.

Any phrase in the rule book is foreign to a coach.

[beachbum]

after reading all the posts, I think I can now sum up everyones thoughts in 4 words

BE
OPEN
FIRM
HONEST
FRIENDLY

anything else to add???

[dbking]

Remember that they have an emotional interest in the outcome!

I think that there are several things that work for me.

First one that always helps is:

"Tell me what you saw coach." Listen, then reply with the truth. My normal reply is "... coach I believe that I was in position to make the call and from my angle it did not look like that. I would love to see the video of game, would you please send after the game." Be very succinct and brief but do not appear to walk away from coach. This normally works best after a foul call and you are table side. That is why we go table side in three mechanics.

Second on that sometimes can break the ice"

"Coach I am not sure that I heard a question in there, could you rephrase that a little." I normally use this when I know the coach a little bit better.

Third that you can use once in a blue moon

"Coach I absolutely booted that call. That one is on me."

Fourth one is

"Coach I was in position and I saw the whole play."

Fifth one is

"Coach when you calm down and state a question, I will listen but until then you will have to yell some one else."

Sixth one is

talk to one of the assistants and tell them to rein the head coach in

[btaylor64]

Originally Posted by FrankHtown

One thing I'm trying very hard NOT do this year is get defensive when a coach complains. I'll listen, and tell them what I saw. At some point, it may come down to "Coach, on this one, we may have to agree to disagree."

I find some of the "canned" phrases work very well: "Coach, I'm looking for that at both ends" "Coach, I think I had a pretty good angle on that call." "Coach, you may be right. I'll work harder to get a better look at it next time."

I find a lot of times they just want to vent, and if you can keep your cool, it prevents the discussion from escalating.

But you have to tailor it to your disposition. It has taken me a long time to NOT get defensive, and feel comfortable communicating with coaches.

But I have found "don't ignore them" is very good advice.

Why are you looking for something to call?


Why are you not working hard all the time?

These are just some ways in which coaches can turn these statements around on you. If you decide to use them, I would say 'watch' instead of 'look' and I would just tell the coach that the angle closed on me, cause that better happen more than you not actually working hard to get the angle. I always work hard to get the angle, but sometimes from your position you just can't get the angle.

I would also read the article about NBA refs and coaches. That could tell you alot about how coaches approach situations w/ refs and how they expect refs to act, keeping in mind that at the HS level some coaches don't know any better than to act a fool and putting them in their place might settle them down... eventually. Most don't know how to get a "calculated technical". They are always surprised when they get them.

Good luck to you.