Hold The Ball

[tjchamp]

I did reply. The head of refs has actually thrown out the same parent twice before. He's in my court. The other coach in the game also indicated my partner and I did fine. Could have done better, but ... The league "has" to send out the letter, part of their guidelines I guess.

[Dribble]

I'd write a letter back to the league and tell them my side of the story. Mention in specifics exactly what happened and that the coach could perhaps be biased. Ask the league to find out if anybody taped the game, and if so, if they could review the incident to see if there is any evidence either way.

You didn't indicate who won the game. I'm assuming that A won and that team B was bitter. Sounds like that team and their followers need to be reminded of sportsmanship!!!

[Adam]

I probably would have had the parents quieted down after the first altercation, when it became obvious they were getting out of hand. Normal bickering and begging is one thing, but this kind of "chatter" isn't part of the game, and can hinder your ability to focus on the game. Especially the one who is HS certified (I assume this means as a ref).
Of course, this assumes this all took place as I imagine in my head, and my head can be a pretty creative place.

[ChrisSportsFan]

Did you know before the game that Mr. Certified had previously been tossed twice? Knowing that before-hand would probably get him a shorter leash and tossed on the first altercation.

[Dribble]

Reading the post, I don't think the OP meant that the certified ref was the one that was tossed twice prior.

I failed to mention suggestions on how to improve on my first reply. I think what could help is if you get coach B on your side right away. I've had similar situations where I've had coach B talk to his followers to have them settle down, which worked very well.

You have the ability to give a technical foul to team B. I did that ONCE in my life after continued blabbering from parents and it worked great!

The other parents also probably had it down pat...you should've tossed the individual sooner. If not directly, then by talking to site admin at the first deadball after you deemed it necessary.

I find that there are more hecklers when reffing young kids than at my college/university games. Ignorant parents who think their kid will make the NBA or WNBA.

[tjchamp]

Originally Posted by Dribble

Reading the post, I don't think the OP meant that the certified ref was the one that was tossed twice prior.

Yes, the certified ref was the one who got tossed. The head of the league refs was the one who tossed him, I found that out after the game. Ths guy only does 10th and below. I wonder why?! I did write the league back with my side of the story. I did see a parent video taping the game, and informed the league of that. However, no parent is fessin' up to taping the game, also suspicious if you ask me.

What I'm going to take away from this is to be a little calmer, yet still assertive, when I have action after the whistle. Probably get both coaches together and chat just to get the players/fans/coaches a chance to calm down if nothing else.

[Dribble]

Sorry, I didn't realize it was the certified ref that was the parent that got tossed. In my association, this individual would get reprimanded for abusing a colleague, and if it continued (as it has in this situation), then he would probably be thrown out. I can't believe the lack of professionalism in this individual!

[BktBallRef]

Originally Posted by tjchamp

I did reply. The head of refs has actually thrown out the same parent twice before. He's in my court. The other coach in the game also indicated my partner and I did fine. Could have done better, but ... The league "has" to send out the letter, part of their guidelines I guess.

Then have your lawyer write the league a letter.

[Dribble]

BktBallRef has a good point. The coach is commiting slander by alleging you swore at his players. That defames your character is should not be tolerated. I know that it's a pain in the a$$ to get a lawyer to write a letter, but maybe you have a friend who's in the business and can draft something up on official letterhead.

Coaches have too many liberties already on us and it shouldn't continue off-the-court where they're writing letters with lies in it.