Ridiculous things that coaches say

[His High Holiness]

All;

In case Little League umpires feel that they are the only ones that have to listen to stupid things that coaches say, read the following:

Last night I was working a game in the Valley League. This is a league of excellent college players played in a professional environment. There were about 600 paid attendance, numerous minor league style promotions, and all manner of bells and whistles. (No umpires' dressing room, yet. We aren't that high on the food chain!)

The home team came into the game with a record of 2-13 and the visiors had a record of 13-3 so we were expecting a blowout.

Lo and behold, the home team is miraculously up 2-0 in late innings when one of the visitors steals second. At this point in the game there had been absolutely no controversy about anything. Anyway, I called him safe and the home team coach came running onto the field and yelled:

"You wanted him to be safe. You are determined to help the other team."

I had had no close calls up to this point (and I had no close calls afterward) so I was surprised at his comment. It was so absurd that I had to stifle a laugh. I said. "That's one of the most riduculous things that I have ever heard. All umpires want outs. Furthermore, if the home team wins, that's 3 fewer outs that I have to call."

He turned around and went back to the dugout and the rest of the game was played without any further ado. Home team prevailed 2-1.

He was just putting on a show for his team and the home team fans. At least he could have said something more intelligent.

Oh well!

Peter