So um... I finally ejected my first coach w/ ?

You probably did pull the trigger a bit too quickly. I'm not judging you, but think a warning to the offending person and the head coach probably would have been sufficient. If the behavior continued, then the ejection would be more warranted.

As for the ejection method, there was something in Referee magazine a month or so ago. I can't seem to find the particular issue I have in mind, but the mechanic goes something like this: step back so that you are at a right angle to the person, and at the same time, give the arm throw (just like you sell an out call) using the index finger and yell "you're out of the game!" I know this sounds harsh or showoffish, but it can be done so you don't look the MLB guys making a show of it.