Smart-alec comebacks

[sj]

I'll add this one that I don't think is smart alec but maybe is done with a little attitude. I hope it's ok. It will happen when there is a close play where someone watching the play think a foul could have been called either way.

So let's say you have a foul on White. Coach Red however thinks immediately when you call it that you've called it on Red. So he starts in with the whining. As you come to the table the whining continues. Not enough for a technical but it goes on. He continues and everybody in the gym can hear him making a spectacle of himself. So instead of answering him back you just stand there and wait until he quits. It might take a little time but don't say a word. Then when he's done and the gym is dead quiet you look at the table and say, "The foul is on White. 3-2. Holding. Red Ball."

Then just turn and walk away. It takes some timing but you haven't said a word and the coach has pretty much hung himself.