OT - funniest comment?

[Mark Padgett]

I ran into a fellow ref yesterday (no, not with my car) and he asked me what was the funniest comment I ever heard at a game. I had to think for a minute (which is extremely difficult for someone my age) because I've heard so many funny ones and it would be really hard to pick just one out. However, I came up with this one:

Coach B keeps complaining every time A1 is dribbling. A1 dribbles really "high" and sometimes very "low", but breaks no rules. After yet another complaint, my partner (this was a few years ago) tells Coach B that there's nothing illegal about the way A1 has been dribbling. Coach B says, "Yeah, I know - but it looks really ugly." Partner replies, "Coach, if looking ugly was against the rules, you wouldn't be allowed in the gym." The coach had a good sense of humor and just laughed.

I don't know if that was the funniest ever, but it's probably in my top five.

What about you guys?

[REFANDUMP]

I had a noisy fan once stand up and yell at me " That was a terrible call ...(after a short pause) ... even for you !!! I had to admit that I got a chuckle out of that one.

[Adam]

"I'm not joking."

From a JV coach (whom I found out later had won state titles at the varsity level in another region of the state) after seeing me grin at his insinuation that his player's butt cheek becomes his "pivot" upon falling down with the ball.

"Go back to school and get your patch!" JV fans. (I was wearing a "naked" shirt due to a busy week.)

[tref]

2 players going after a "loose ball" A shoves B (tweet) Bs ball.

Coach A: No way that can be a foul!! Its a loose ball!!

Parent of B: So we have a free-for-all everytime the ball is loose?!?!?

I just started clapping

[grunewar]

My most recent one:

Late in the second quarter of GV (or VG) game and I am T and one of my P's (the R) is inbounding the ball on the endline. I'm chopping clock too of course. TWEEET! P announces, "Five seconds."

H Coach, "What? You've got to be kidding? That fast?"

We discussed it at half time as I too thought the count was pretty quick and when I heard the TWEET I thought the player had called a TO. Nope, P says it was a good 5 sec count.

Me = ok.

Now, the H Coach has a great attitude. His team is down by 20 and we're late in the 3rd quarter. I call a foul, report, and am now T for FT's. The R is now C and he's counting.....coach yells to his FT shooter, "You better hurry up, 'Quick Draw' is counting!

R and I grinned as we thought it was pretty funny as we remembered the ole cartoon character.

I whispered to the coach, "Don't worry about it, she's got till TEN this time."

[Welpe]

My latest favorite was from a football game I worked this year. I flagged pass interference on a 2 point try attempt and it just happens to be against my sideline. All 50 coaches (slight exaggeration) went nuts like I had done something really obscene directed at them, kind of like seeing a cage full of monkies get all riled up. Anyways, as I'm heading back to the sideline for the kick off, I have one coach following me yelling "COME ON YOU'RE BETTER THAN THAT!"

It took everything in my power not to reply "I wouldn't be so quick to make that judgment coach..."

[bainsey]

A1: "Coach! I need a quick sub!"
Coach A: "I don't have a quick sub. You're all slow!"

[grunewar]

Halftime, B12 Rec League Game.

A Coach comes up and says, "Ref, you gotta watch B5. When he sets his screens, he jumps into the player and hooks his arm and has a tendency to hold."

I said, "I haven't noticed it, but I'll keep an eye out."

He says, "Seriously, he does it all the time. I know, I taught him last year when he played for me..... He's crafty about it too."

[Mark Padgett]

OK - here's two involving the sons of former NBA players. I reffed them in our local kids rec league when they were young kids. First: Maurice Lucas Jr. (called "Reece") was along the FT line waiting for a kid from the other team to shoot his FTs. Apparently, Reece thought it was a 1 and 1, not 2 shots, because when the kid missed, Reece jumped really high to grab the rebound, came down swinging his elbows and screaming. He then looked around and realized there was another shot coming. His dad, "The Enforcer", was in the stands and yelled, "Reece - get your head in the game. Nice board, though."

The other was a game I was working that had Kenny Carr's son in it. Every time the other team's point guard was dribbling the ball, Kenny would yell from the bleachers, "travel, travel, that's a travel, he's traveling" or something similar. Finally, I went over to him and said, "Kenny, you played in the NBA. How would you know what a travel is?" He grinned and said, "You know, you got a point."

[26 Year Gap]

Originally Posted by grunewar

My most recent one:

Late in the second quarter of GV (or VG) game and I am T and one of my P's (the R) is inbounding the ball on the endline. I'm chopping clock too of course. TWEEET! P announces, "Five seconds."

H Coach, "What? You've got to be kidding? That fast?"

We discussed it at half time as I too thought the count was pretty quick and when I heard the TWEET I thought the player had called a TO. Nope, P says it was a good 5 sec count.

Me = ok.

Now, the H Coach has a great attitude. His team is down by 20 and we're late in the 3rd quarter. I call a foul, report, and am now T for FT's. The R is now C and he's counting.....coach yells to his FT shooter, "You better hurry up, 'Quick Draw' is counting!

R and I grinned as we thought it was pretty funny as we remembered the ole cartoon character.

I whispered to the coach, "Don't worry about it, she's got till TEN this time."

[M&M Guy]

Pssttt...26, you know that's actually Baba Looie, Quick Draw McGraw's sidekick? You know, the cute, little one that tags along and plays the straight man? You, know, kinda like that squirrel that pops up around here every now and then?

(Quick Draw's on the right...)

[26 Year Gap]

Originally Posted by M&M Guy

Pssttt...26, you know that's actually Baba Looie, Quick Draw McGraw's sidekick? You know, the cute, little one that tags along and plays the straight man? You, know, kinda like that squirrel that pops up around here every now and then?

(Quick Draw's on the right...)

Baba Loouie was agreeing with the sentiment about his partner. Do I have to explain EVERYTHING?

[M&M Guy]

Originally Posted by 26 Year Gap

Baba Loouie was agreeing with the sentiment about his partner. Do I have to explain EVERYTHING?

To me? Well, duh...

[bainsey]

Originally Posted by M&M Guy

Pssttt...26, you know that's actually Baba Looie, Quick Draw McGraw's sidekick?

Did he grow up to be Howard Stern's sidekick?

[M&M Guy]

I knew Baba Looey. He was a friend of mine. Howard Stern's sidekick is no Baba Looey.