Establishing confidence, confidence and respect from coaches and players

[sing19702000]

What are some of the best ways to establish confidence, cooperation and respect from coaches and players.

[Nevadaref]

1. Demand it, not with words, but by making it clear that anything else is unacceptable behavior.
2. Penalize if they don't properly give it. Don't allow yourself to be abused.
3. Treat them with respect.
4. Be professional, hustle, and do a good job.

[JRutledge]

All you can do is be professional from the moment you accept the game to the time you arrive, to the time you leave. There is nothing you are going to do be able to do more than that. Some coaches will know your experience level and will set a tone for their players. Other times they will not know anything about you that can be done. People take their own perceptions and attitudes about respect. You may do all the right things and still not get someone's respect. All you can ever do is be professional and look professional. Judgments will be made about you long before you the ball is tossed up.

Peace

[just another ref]

Be correct in what you do as much as possible, but whether you are correct or not, be quick and decisive.

[Hugh Refner]

If you want respect from coaches, make every call go their way. Of course, this works only half the time.

[budjones05]

Deliever more than you promise!

[Bad Zebra]

Originally Posted by sing19702000

What are some of the best ways to establish confidence, cooperation and respect from coaches and players.

You can demand cooperation, but respect has to be earned. A recipe that has worked for me:

1) Be competent. Know the rules. Know the mechanics. Prepare.
2) Be confident. This is only possible if you master #1
3) Be concise. Avoid unneccessary conversation, editorializing before or after the game with fellow officials, AD's, coaches, or players
4) Be decisive. Crisp whistle. Crisp mechanics. Crisp voice when reporting.

[mbyron]

Originally Posted by Hugh Refner

If you want respect from coaches, make every call go their way. Of course, this works only half the time.

No: it works 100% of the time, just with half the coaches.

[just another ref]

Originally Posted by Hugh Refner

If you want respect from coaches, make every call go their way. Of course, this works only half the time.

Respect is not really the right word in this case. It's like the cartoon, where the couple is entering the cheap hotel room.

Her: Will you still respect me in the morning?

Him: I don't respect you now.

Originally Posted by just another ref

Respect is not really the right word in this case. It's like the cartoon, where the couple is entering the cheap hotel room.

Her: Will you still respect me in the morning?

Him: I don't respect you now.

You know, I think I had this conversation with the very first coach who I T'd up, in my very first game as an official back when I was still in HS. Of course, a female coach from a Catholic school swearing at me in a game at a Lutheran school would have started a conversation in the gym regardless of who was having the conversation!

[Adam]

Originally Posted by sing19702000

What are some of the best ways to establish confidence, cooperation and respect from coaches and players.

Pick a player you want to respect you, or a coach for that matter (you have to choose) and make every call go his/her way.

[Mark Padgett]

Originally Posted by Ref Ump Welsch

You know, I think I had this conversation with the very first coach who I T'd up, in my very first game as an official back when I was still in HS. Of course, a female coach from a Catholic school swearing at me in a game at a Lutheran school would have started a conversation in the gym regardless of who was having the conversation!

About six or seven years ago, I was working a boys HS rec tourney with a female official. After the first quarter, she told me she thought one of the coaches (a guy who looked about in his early 30s) was staring at her chest every time she got near him. She asked me to talk to him about it. I must admit, her request threw me a little. I thought about it and came up with this - before the quarter started, I went over to him and said (in a manner that gave the impression I was talking to him "guy to guy") something like, "Hey, you know my partner is a real looker, don't you think?" He gave me a dirty little smile and said, "Yeah, and she's got really nice t**s, too!"

I looked back at him very seriously and said, "Yeah, and if you don't stop staring at them, you're outta here. I'm serious." He looked shocked and eventually turned away. He didn't say anything or stare any more, however.

After the game, my partner asked me what I said to him. I told her that I said to him that even though she was an extremely attractive young lady, it wasn't professional to gaze at her during the game and that he agreed. She looked at me, smiled and said, "Yeah, right Padgett. I know you better than that."

Gee - I guess you could make a case that I "baited" him.

[Mregor]

Originally Posted by Hugh Refner

If you want respect from coaches, make every call go their way. Of course, this works only half the time.

Actually, it will probably work all the time but with only half the people.

Mregor

[mbyron]

Originally Posted by Mregor

Actually, it will probably work all the time but with only half the people.

Mregor

Hmm. See post #8.

[tomegun]

1a. Understand going in that coaches don't like you (as an official which is the capacity you are in at the time), most players don't like you and many parents don't like you.
1b. Knowing the rules and the mechanics should be a given, but being able to apply the rules and doing a good job is priority #1.
2. Be professional. A professional official without 1b is just a professional who does a horrible job. From the time you drive on the school property, you must be professional.
3. Look the part. From your uniform to your fitness, look like a basketball official who is prepared to at least attempt to keep up with the action of the game. I can admit to gaining a little weight over the last couple of years although at 185 pounds I'm not plump by any means. But at camp a few weeks ago, my fitness began to impact how I did as the camp went along. My focus wasn't where it should have been. I sit here, sore, typing this having started a new workout to get me back to where I need to be. The hardest part is watching what I eat although it has improved dramatically over the last week. Fortunately, there aren't many Popeye's in Vegas.