Attacked at a Game

[RANCHMAN]

I officiated a tournament Girls Varsity game in North Zulch, Texas. It involved a game between North Zulch, and a team they should have easily defeated, (since they obviously wanted to advance in their own tournament). I think the root of the problem that I encountered was the result of a girl’s varsity game that I officiated in North Zulch last year. After North Zulch lost a close game, the female coach approached me and began explaining how my partner and I stole the game from them, and continued her tantrum with her arms flinging, etc. In the tournament game I am referring to today, everything seemed to be fine in the first half because North Zulch girls had a lead. From my standpoint the head coach only questioned three violations I called on a young lady on her team. In each case I yelled “get out of the lane” several times and she would just not move, so I had no choice but to call three second violations. In the third quarter after the opposing team took the lead, the coach for North Zulch began showing a growing antagonism toward me. She at one point yelled across court why I called a palming violation on one of her girls when her hand was not under the ball. I told her that the ball did not have to placed on the bottom of the ball to have a violation in this case. My co-official, and I had called several traveling, double dribbles, and palming violations on this particular young lady. Early in the fourth quarter with the opponent leading by about twelve points, I was handing the ball to a player for a throw in when the coach yelled something, so I looked over at her, and she yelled back very loudly “I AM NOT TALKING TO YOU”! During the next time out I asked my co-official to change sides with me because I had spent the majority of the third quarter, and part of the fourth quarter along the bleachers that the North Zulch fans were occupying, and explained to him that the fans were making some really nasty remarks to me (I heard a fan call me a dumb b*****d, and several other names that of course upset me). He moved over for me, then with about 1:20 left in the game, and North Zulch down by ten points I handed the ball to an opposing player for a throw in, and started my count. At that time I noticed a North Zulch player holding a hand full of jersey, so I called a holding violation. The North Zulch coach yelled very loudly across the court where everyone could hear her “YOU WILL NEVER OFFICATE HERE AGAIN”! (she said it twice). After the game I walked to the refs changing room, and noticed two officials that I have a tremendous amount of respect for standing outside the dressing room door, so I said my hellos. I then turned toward the front of the gym to leave when the North Zulch coach grabbed the left arm of my jacket and told me to follow her because she wanted to talk to me. When I turned to follow her one of the officials tugged my other arm and told me not to do that. At that point in a very nasty voice she told me that I would NEVER officiate in North Zulch again, did I understand! I then lost my composure, and I think I said something really unprofessional like,( I would not lower myself to officiate a bunch of white trash in this town again). The referee then pulled my arm, so that I was moving toward the front door of the gym. She followed but I really cannot remember exactly what she, and I said, but after the few steps it took to reach the front of the gym, the coach’s son punched me I think in the right top of my shoulder or neck, but I cannot remember. This was not a kid; he looked to be in his late twenty’s. At that time I tried my best to get to him for that cheap shot, but both officials grabbed me and prevented me from getting to him. I struggled to reach him, but I finally came to my senses and gave up. By this time I was outside, and the female coach was threatening to call the police etc. so one of the officials walked me to my car, and said if I needed to contact he or the other official, they would be happy to give their input the way they viewed the situation. I just feel this coach could have just contacted the chapter if she did not like my officiating instead of handling the situation the way she did. She knew that nothing positive was going to happen by confronting me, other than an unpleasant situation. Even though my co-official called a large number of violations against North Zulch, the coach nor fans really blamed him because he resides in that general community, and it seemed like allot of people knew him at that game. I called this game the way I saw it, and really if North Zulch had scored on just a fifth of the open shots they had, the game would have been a blow out. With recent events at this town, i.e., a brawl between players, and fans last year during in a game with a team in the general vicinity, which was caused by racial slurs aimed at the black players on the opposing team, and a statement by my co-official about a biracial referee in our association that was called a n…….over and over again, and how sick he felt about it, I wonder why I am officiating. This is my third year, and I have been told that I have a good chance of getting playoff games this year. I stay in excellent shape, read every article I can find regarding rules, and mechanics, because I want to be as competent as possible, because I know the kids, fans, and coaches expect it. I do not officiate for the money; it’s about the love of the game, and watching the kids play. I have turned in a complaint to the Texas Association of Sports Officials; however I have allot of soul searching to do because I have noticed that fans are getting more abusive. Before I forget I wanted to mention how thankful I am for all of the officials that contribute to this forum. I have received a wealth of knowledge, so keep up the good work, and I will continue to visit the web site even if I decide to move on.
I wish you all a very Blessed and Safe Holiday!

Sincerely,
Mark

[DonInKansas]

First up, some paragraph breaks would make this a little easier to read. All the text running together is making my eyes water.

Secondly, did you administer any technicals? I can't believe she was still around at the end of this game.

Thirdly, going with a coach who grabs you by the arm, especially after a game like that, is asking for trouble.

[RookieDude]

Just a few things...take em' or leave em'.

* Show strength in your games...through demeanor, mechanics, rules knowledge etc.

* Don't "YELL" at anyone...just say what needs to be said and move on.

* Don't get emotional...stay calm and cool in the face of calamity.

* Get thicker skin when dealing with fans...don't have "rabbit ears".

* Take care of business...if a coach/player needs it...whack em'.

* Stay away from volatile coaches after the game...nothing good can happen.

Those are just a few items to think about...

[RCBSports]

Originally Posted by RookieDude

Just a few things...take em' or leave em'.

* Show strength in your games...through demeanor, mechanics, rules knowledge etc.

* Don't "YELL" at anyone...just say what needs to be said and move on.

* Don't get emotional...stay calm and cool in the face of calamity.

* Get thicker skin when dealing with fans...don't have "rabbit ears".

* Take care of business...if a coach/player needs it...whack em'.

* Stay away from volatile coaches after the game...nothing good can happen.

Those are just a few items to think about...

I agree with this as well as the post afterwords. I really don't see how you didn't whack that coach with a T. Normally I give them a warning then the second they start doing the same crap, bam! Don't take crap from the coaches...seriously, you may not want to seem like a hardass but you have to do your job and that's to call the game. And allowing that coach to yell at you like that is against the rules. So next time whack em/

As for the list above, I agree with it all. After the game, go straight to your dressing room and stay there. As for me, I am a student athletic director at my high school...yes, I am a junior...and what I do is I escort the referees to the room before/after/and during half time. No one touches them, period. And they normally stay about 20 min after the game anyway.

Then you make a sneaky move out to your car and go along with your day.

A lot of repeats, yea, but this is where ya gotta learn from!

Take care!

[rockyroad]

Originally Posted by DonInKansas

First up, some paragraph breaks would make this a little easier to read. All the text running together is making my eyes water.

Secondly, did you administer any technicals? I can't believe she was still around at the end of this game.

Thirdly, going with a coach who grabs you by the arm, especially after a game like that, is asking for trouble.

So this "young" official sends in a situation which was obviously quite upsetting to him, and the best you can do is criticize his typing skills??? Get a life there in Kansas, would you.

And Ranchman, self-evaluation is always a good thing. But I can pretty much guarantee you that EVERY official goes through something like this at least once in their career. Whether it escalates to this level or not, there is always a game where the fans are horrible, the coach blames you in the local media, some player or parent files some kind of "complaint" against you, etc., etc. We have all gone through it. Quitting officiating would not be a good idea - the best advice I can give is to learn from this, talk to those other officials who were there and witnessed it, file charges against the guy who punched you, turn back any games you get from this school, and then get on with your officiating career. It's one game - how many good, fun games have you had? Bet it's more than one! Don't let the one bad one ruin all the other good experiences. You have to get back up in that saddle again.

[Rita C]

Originally Posted by rockyroad

So this "young" official sends in a situation which was obviously quite upsetting to him, and the best you can do is criticize his typing skills??? Get a life there in Kansas, would you.

This was important to this young official. I wanted to read his story but it was too difficult on a computer screen without the paragraph breaks.

Proper communication is important. Paragraph breaks are part of that.

Rita

[j2u4now]

You got what you gave.............
It is what it is...................

You let her control your crew and didn't do anything about it.
You gave her the chance and she abused it, and you did nothing about it.
Coaches are to coach, you are to officiate. When coaches officiate, you should have whacked her.

[rockyroad]

Originally Posted by Rita C

This was important to this young official. I wanted to read his story but it was too difficult on a computer screen without the paragraph breaks.

Proper communication is important. Paragraph breaks are part of that.

Rita

It wasn't that difficult to read, for crying out loud. Try reading 7th grade research reports for a couple of days - those are hard to read!

[Rita C]

Originally Posted by rockyroad

It wasn't that difficult to read, for crying out loud. Try reading 7th grade research reports for a couple of days - those are hard to read!

He wrote it well. It's just difficult to read on a computer when there aren't paragraphs. I tried "underlining" going line by line to make it easier to follow.

Rita

[swkansasref33]

Originally Posted by rockyroad

So this "young" official sends in a situation which was obviously quite upsetting to him, and the best you can do is criticize his typing skills??? Get a life there in Kansas, would you.

it doesnt appear to me that he was criticizing his typing skills... just that he might edit it to make it easier to read. it was a little hard for me to follow due to the length and the fact that there are no breaks. just my 2 cents

[amusedofficial]

Originally Posted by swkansasref33

it doesnt appear to me that he was criticizing his typing skills... just that he might edit it to make it easier to read. it was a little hard for me to follow due to the length and the fact that there are no breaks. just my 2 cents

Yeah, it was hard to read. But it told a story that is pretty scary, adn that needs to be discussed, irrespective of whether you think the coach should have been whacked early and often or whether you think the official should have walked away when confronted.

Keep in mind that the OP was written while fresh in the official's mind and he no doubt was eager to get feedback from people who could understand what's it's like to be the loneliest person in the gym, even if they disagreed with aspects of how it was handled. So the fact that his words spilled out in a torrent is understandable and reflects the situation.

In this context, complaints about his formatting of the written post are out of line. Whack!

[swkansasref33]

Originally Posted by amusedofficial

Yeah, it was hard to read. But it told a story that is pretty scary, adn that needs to be discussed, irrespective of whether you think the coach should have been whacked early and often or whether you think the official should have walked away when confronted.

Keep in mind that the OP was written while fresh in the official's mind and he no doubt was eager to get feedback from people who could understand what's it's like to be the loneliest person in the gym, even if they disagreed with aspects of how it was handled. So the fact that his words spilled out in a torrent is understandable and reflects the situation.

In this context, complaints about his formatting of the written post are out of line. Whack!

haha good one

[Camron Rust]

Originally Posted by amusedofficial

Yeah, it was hard to read. But it told a story that is pretty scary, adn that needs to be discussed, irrespective of whether you think the coach should have been whacked early and often or whether you think the official should have walked away when confronted.

Keep in mind that the OP was written while fresh in the official's mind and he no doubt was eager to get feedback from people who could understand what's it's like to be the loneliest person in the gym, even if they disagreed with aspects of how it was handled. So the fact that his words spilled out in a torrent is understandable and reflects the situation.

In this context, complaints about his formatting of the written post are out of line. Whack!

A story will be heard by far more people if it is presented in a readable format. There may be many that never get past the first line due to the presentation...I didn't. How effective is the post if people close it on sight without knowing what was in it. If there is a story to tell, tell it...but make it accessible.

[Kelvin green]

1) Deal with the coach in the game. Personally sounds like you did not take care of her early. There are several ways of doing this.... Tell the coach to stop and then whack. Tell the coach and then tell a captain the coach is getting close to the line and help take care of it and then whack...Dont put up with it and whack...

2) If fans are yelling obscenities, why not get the game administration to address it. You would not let the yelling like that go on in a classroom would you?

3) Sounds like some mechanics issues to me... How can you referee an most of the time along one side line. Between switching on fouls, rotations, balls OOB, violations there has to be alot more moving that what you describe...

4) She yells twice you'll never officiate here again? and you dont run her? Where is your partner? If you did not run her and I was your partner I run her.

5) Why not just go into the locker room? The locker room is yours and she's not going to follow-you in. (one of the biggest arguments for changing at the gym)

6) Tell the coach to get out of your face and go to the locker room. In UT we have a no contact rule after the game. Violation is suspension of the coach.

7) Coach grabs my arm, the first thing I would tell her is to get her hands off me or she is going to jail.

7) You went after somone who hit you? You had witnesses on your side. Criminal Charges and Civil lawsuits will take care of that, but most of this would have been avoided if you went to the locker room and waited 15 minutes...

8) Where was your partner in all this?

9) why turn in a report to TASO? do they in turn file it with State/League Officials? If not the complaint should have gone to them...


Dont take this the wrong way but sounds like you need to work on some game mangement skills and (if you did not get the earlier point) learning how to go to the locker room after the game.

One of my pet peeves is an official (especially varsity) who comes to the game dressed, and runs out of the game as soon as it is done. (unless the school has no locker room... I have been to very few schools that dont offer the officials some sort of room...

And BTW did I ask where your partner was at?

RANCHMAN - First & foremost, I feel your pain! I too have been attacked AFTER a team lost a game to the better team. I know the frustration level you must be at right about now. You had nothing to do with the outcome, but it's easier for some people to place the blame on officials as opposed to looking at how many lay-ups & FTs they missed, how many TOs they committed, how lousy their defense & play calling was, etc, etc.

In addition to everything that's been said, I'd like to add 2 other words of advice:

1. From this day forward PLEASE understand that the court is yours! You have been entrusted in a position of authority. YOU & YOUR teammates are in charge of any/every thing that happens on the court... before, during & after the contest.
I don't know your experience level, but your description of events sounds as if you allowed much too much talking & not enough coaching. Sometimes a good T allows the coach to regain their focus and coach their team to a victory. Take it or leave it...

2. Try to forgive them ASAP!! Don't let this eat at you & turn you sour to the avocation. The sooner you let this go (by all means, press charges & pursue justice) and make a choice to use this as a learning experience, the better.
Take it or leave it...


My experience has changed my life & I'm a better person since going through it.


Life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. -Charles Swindoll