Warning!! Danger!! Annual Off-topic Baseball Thread '07!! Beware!!

[M&M Guy]

Originally Posted by Jurassic Referee

Absolutely amazing! Ninety years later the Cubbies start another hippo, Carlos Zambrano. He goes about 450, doesn't he?

Get it straight:

Wells = hippo
Zambrano = rhino

Sheesh.

[ChuckElias]

ESPN.com makes predictions for every day of the regular season: http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2...l&sportCat=mlb

Here's the highlights for April!

April 16: Former Cubs ace Mark Prior earns his way out of Triple-A Iowa by blowing out his shoulder.

April 18: After calling a game-ending third strike on Delmon Young of the Devil Rays, umpire Joe West tasers Young in the chest in a pre-emptive strike.

April 21: The huge number of camera flashes from the Japanese media photographing Daisuke Matsuzaka's first major-league pitch to Hideki Matsui unfortunately sets both players aflame.

April 24: With J.D. Drew down in the outfield with a strained hamstring after trying to run down a deep fly ball hit by Toronto's Vernon Wells, fellow Red Sox outfielder Manny Ramirez runs over to his fallen teammate, takes a picture with him and then attempts to sell Drew on eBay.

April 29: With the bases loaded for the Red Sox and only one out in the seventh inning of the Yankees' home game against Boston, Alex Rodriguez calls for an infield meeting at the mound so he can pass Derek Jeter a note that reads: "Will u b my bff? YES/no/maybe."

[M&M Guy]

I'm willing to bet 2 out of the 5 will actually come true.

As fun as it is to point out Prior's and Wood's problems, I was surprised to hear a stat on the radio last night. Apparently 6 out the last 7 (or maybe it was 7 out of the last 8) top Pirates pitching prospects have all had major arm surgery already. Maybe they can borrow the Cubs' staff to learn how to keep it down to 2 or 3?...

[Jurassic Referee]

Originally Posted by M&M Guy

As fun as it is to point out Prior's and Wood's problems, I was surprised to hear a stat on the radio last night.

Yo, eMMy, here's another one for you.....

What's the difference between a Yankees hotdog and a Cubbies hotdog?

[M&M Guy]

Originally Posted by Jurassic Referee

Yo, eMMy, here's another one for you.....

What's the difference between a Yankees hotdog and a Cubbies hotdog?

...sigh...I know I shouldn't, but here goes:

One of them's full of sh!t?

No?

Ok, I give up. What's the difference?

[Jurassic Referee]

Originally Posted by M&M Guy

Ok, I give up. What's the difference?

You can get a Yankees hotdog in October.

[mick]

[From USA Today]

Tigers, Blue Jays happy to stay inside
DETROIT (AP) -This was no weather for baseball.
With light snow falling, the temperature in the mid-20s and the wind chill dipping into single digits, Thursday's game between the Detroit Tigers and was postponed until Sept. 10.

[Dan_ref]

Originally Posted by mick

[From USA Today]

Tigers, Blue Jays happy to stay inside
DETROIT (AP) -This was no weather for baseball.
With light snow falling, the temperature in the mid-20s and the wind chill dipping into single digits, Thursday's game between the Detroit Tigers and was postponed until Sept. 10.

Sept 10, the mud should be all dried up by then.

[Mark Dexter]

Originally Posted by mick

Thursday's game between the Detroit Tigers and was postponed until Sept. 10.

Won't you be getting the 07-08 winter snow at that point?

[mick]

Originally Posted by Mark Dexter

Won't you be getting the 07-08 winter snow at that point?

Ha ! I dunno.
I think maybe they use a similar counting method that is used when *they* count to determine that "bad things happen in threes".

At an arbitrary point in time, you just start over again.

[Mark Dexter]

Pitchers.......................IP......H.......R.. .....ER......BB.....SO......ERA
D Matsuzaka (W, 1-0)....7.0.....6.......1.......1.......1.......10.. ....1.29

[Jurassic Referee]

Originally Posted by Mark Dexter

Pitchers.......................IP......H.......R.. .....ER......BB.....SO......ERA
D Matsuzaka (W, 1-0)....7.0.....6.......1.......1.......1.......10.. ....1.29

Don't have an orgasm just yet. Don't forget that he was only pitching against a Triple-A team. Wait 'til the big kids get out of school.

[ChuckElias]

I didn't want to start another off-topic thread, so I'll tell this story here. My wife and I were walking the dog Monday morning, when we saw 4 large birds circling overhead. We're used to seeing Peregrine Falcons around here, but these were not falcons. One landed in a tree near us and my wife thought it was a turkey vulture. We got home and looked it up online and, sure enough, it was a turkey vulture.

Why do I mention this here (other than to give "26 Year Gap" another reason to kid me about walking the dog)? Because in the article describing the turkey vultrue, we read the following:

Its primary form of defense is vomiting. These birds do not "projectile vomit," as many would claim. They simply cough up a lump of semi-digested meat. This foul-smelling substance deters most creatures intent on raiding a vulture nest. It will also sting if the offending animal is close enough to get the vomit in its face or eyes.

They'll literally puke on your shoes!!! Are turkey vultures the ancient ancestors of basketball officials? Do turkey vultures also employ the dreaded "stare at their pants" defense? Inquiring minds want to know!

[Jurassic Referee]

Originally Posted by ChuckElias

My wife and I were walking the dog Monday morning, when we saw 4 large birds circling overhead. We're used to seeing Peregrine Falcons around here, but these were not falcons. One landed in a tree near us and my wife thought it was a turkey vulture. We got home and looked it up online and, sure enough, it was a turkey vulture.

They must have seen you officiate before.

Don't feel bad. Every time I look out my window, I see buzzards circling my house.

[rainmaker]

Originally Posted by ChuckElias

I didn't want to start another off-topic thread, so I'll tell this story here. My wife and I were walking the dog Monday morning, when we saw 4 large birds circling overhead. We're used to seeing Peregrine Falcons around here, but these were not falcons. One landed in a tree near us and my wife thought it was a turkey vulture. We got home and looked it up online and, sure enough, it was a turkey vulture.

Why do I mention this here (other than to give "26 Year Gap" another reason to kid me about walking the dog)? Because in the article describing the turkey vultrue, we read the following:


They'll literally puke on your shoes!!! Are turkey vultures the ancient ancestors of basketball officials? Do turkey vultures also employ the dreaded "stare at their pants" defense? Inquiring minds want to know!

Wow, Chuck, sounds like you'll be taking your next PhD in paleo-ornithology. Cool!!