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  #16 (permalink)  
Old Tue Jan 09, 2007, 04:05am
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One thing, I never address a coach by his first name, never...ever.

It's always Coach last name here or just Coach.

Just like I hate it when a coach addresses me by first name during a game I believe that goes both ways.

Because if you know the name of one coach, but not the other it could look like a conflict of interest.

That and it just looks like you're too chummy with them.

Address them respectfully, but not with their first names.
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  #17 (permalink)  
Old Tue Jan 09, 2007, 04:12am
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I'm taking my foul to the table, reporting it, saying timeout white, look at the coach and say, "Which one do you want," briefly wait, if he answers I report what he requested, if he doesn't I turn to the other bench and my partner and say, "Full," report that and go to the block.

It's like Jeopardy, I'm not talking unless it's a question, and even if it's a question it isn't getting answered until they are acting like an adult instead of a 3 year old.

They chase me...physically or verbally, they get whacked.
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  #18 (permalink)  
Old Tue Jan 09, 2007, 06:33am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rainmaker
I find that just, "Thank you. Thank you. Thank you." works ...
I have a fellow ref who always says this. One time the coach asked him why he kept saying this in response to all of his comments.

His reply was "Because they won't let me say..."

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jurassic Referee
.....STFU, STFU, STFU...
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  #19 (permalink)  
Old Tue Jan 09, 2007, 09:30am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ref18
One thing, I never address a coach by his first name, never...ever.

Just like I hate it when a coach addresses me by first name during a game I believe that goes both ways.

Because if you know the name of one coach, but not the other it could look like a conflict of interest.

That and it just looks like you're too chummy with them.
I agree that if you use call one coach by name and not the other, then it looks bad to the unnamed coach. But if I know both coaches, which happens a lot now that I've been around the HS game for a while, I have no problem calling them by their first names.

I don't like it when a coach calls me by my first name and they've never met me before. But I can't do anything about it either, so I don't let it bother me.

If all three of you know each other from league play, it's silly to pretend that you don't.
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  #20 (permalink)  
Old Tue Jan 09, 2007, 09:57am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scrapper1
I agree that if you use call one coach by name and not the other, then it looks bad to the unnamed coach. But if I know both coaches, which happens a lot now that I've been around the HS game for a while, I have no problem calling them by their first names.

I don't like it when a coach calls me by my first name and they've never met me before. But I can't do anything about it either, so I don't let it bother me.

If all three of you know each other from league play, it's silly to pretend that you don't.
I agree, and I prefer that the coach calls me by my first name -- it helps to get my attention when s/he's requesting a TO, for example.
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  #21 (permalink)  
Old Tue Jan 09, 2007, 10:00am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ref18
One thing, I never address a coach by his first name, never...ever.

It's always Coach last name here or just Coach.

Just like I hate it when a coach addresses me by first name during a game I believe that goes both ways.

Because if you know the name of one coach, but not the other it could look like a conflict of interest.

That and it just looks like you're too chummy with them.

Address them respectfully, but not with their first names.
I call both coaches by their first names and make sure I have them (I grab a program on the way in or look the teams up on the Internet before heading out). BTW, a coach that has never met me that uses my name -- this tells me he took the time to bother getting my name and then remembering it.

I just read Bob Jenkins post and we worked a game together Saturday night where the coaches did this. Never met them, but they knew our names. Cool.

I've not NOT used a first name with a coach in years. We're all adults.

Last edited by Rich; Tue Jan 09, 2007 at 10:11am.
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  #22 (permalink)  
Old Tue Jan 09, 2007, 10:07am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by deecee
Junker thanks for the advise and it makes sense -- they had no other personnel to unlock the door.

BNR -- good point
Here's where you need to contact your assignor. Someone else needs to be there to take care of you or they need to give the officials a key. A HC should not be your game management.
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  #23 (permalink)  
Old Tue Jan 09, 2007, 10:39am
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Wrong Question

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dan_ref
coach: how was there no foul on that rebound my girl was hammered?
me: Jim (name has been changed) Are you questioning my judgement?
coach: no but...
me: good...

and walk away.
What if the response was: "yes, in this play I am questioning your judgement?

You asked for that one and CANNOT bang him for the response.
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  #24 (permalink)  
Old Tue Jan 09, 2007, 10:54am
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Very Calm

I think it is easy to sit back and say I would have T'd him earlier, which I may have in this situation, but your calmness is impressive. I know my problem is getting angry when I am being yelled at. If you can remain calm and professional you can never be wrong.

Anger makes things worse and can cause to early of a T or a bad response. Believe me I know...

Coaches cannot call time out to speak with you. "Coach please use your time out to coach your team." Turn and walk away. Now if he screams more you have your Lay-up of a T.

Wow this is like Therapy for me...I feel better just thinking about these words and now that I have written them down, I feel like I can use them calmly. If I have a canned response ready, I can use it under stress.
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  #25 (permalink)  
Old Tue Jan 09, 2007, 11:05am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bgleason@neonin
What if the response was: "yes, in this play I am questioning your judgement?

You asked for that one and CANNOT bang him for the response.
The answer to that is "Don't!".

And if he doesn't listen, then you bang him.
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  #26 (permalink)  
Old Tue Jan 09, 2007, 11:16am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bgleason@neonin

Coaches cannot call time out to speak with you. "Coach please use your time out to coach your team." Turn and walk away. Now if he screams more you have your Lay-up of a T.
Coaches can call times-out for whatever they like, that's not our business. But we don't have to engage them in conversation. I'm not going to tell the coach "please use your time out to coach your team". I'll answer one reasonably asked question then I'm walking away.
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  #27 (permalink)  
Old Tue Jan 09, 2007, 11:19am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rich Fronheiser
I've not NOT used a first name with a coach in years. We're all adults.
Coaches always call me by my first name (which apparently is Dickhead).
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  #28 (permalink)  
Old Tue Jan 09, 2007, 11:31am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jurassic Referee
Coaches always call me by my first name (which apparently is Dickhead).
Reminds me of the Bill Cosby:Himself routine where Bill grew up thinking his name was Jesus Christ.
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  #29 (permalink)  
Old Tue Jan 09, 2007, 11:33am
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i have no problem with a coach calling my by my name -- and me calling them by theirs -- i find that in many situations you cal defuse it by being calm and addressing them by their first name. I always introduce my partner and myself before a game and wish coaches a good game and if they have any check if they have any questions. I try and add a bit more of the human element to officiating rather than what becomes robotic sometimes as mandated in the manual. Up until this year I had only given about 4 maybe 5 T's in HS -- this year already at 4 -- 2 coaches (BFresh, boys JV, GV) and one player.

Not that im getting less tolerant just that I am seeing more dramatics than ever and sometimes I feel like im in a production of the West Side Story rather than a basketball game. I will say this the lower level coaches got theirs much faster.
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  #30 (permalink)  
Old Tue Jan 09, 2007, 11:38am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rich Fronheiser
Reminds me of the Bill Cosby:Himself routine where Bill grew up thinking his name was Jesus Christ.
I still have that album. On an old LP--to which a bunch of posters will respond "Whatinthehell is an LP?"
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