How much is too much from a coach?

[rainmaker]

On the subject of T-ing coaches, give me a little advice on this one:

This is from the horrible game I had on Sunday (see thread below titled "Humiliation"). I'm trail, table-side. A1(red) throws a bad pass, B1(white) jumps up to grab it, but misses completely (in my opinion), and the ball goes sailing oob. I blow the whistle, and ofcourse before I can say anything, all the girls are hinting, "White! White!" "She touched it!" "Red ball" etc. I call "White ball" The A (red) coach yells, "Did you call that or did she?" He meant a white player.

Now, does that question my integrity? does it question my competence? If I had called a T, then when things got ugly, I could have tossed him. But of course I couldn't know that ahead of time. At the time of the comment, I felt that giving a T would be stooping to his level and I just ignored it. I know, I know, I ended up stooping even lower, later.

What should I have done?