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  #1 (permalink)  
Old Mon Nov 15, 2004, 09:56am
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Men's competitive rec league. A1 is inbounding the ball and accepts the ball right next to the inbounds line even though B1 is right there also. B1 tips the pass to B2 and A1 wants to know what I'm going to do about it. At the next dead ball I explained that B1 didn't reach across and he might consider taking a step or 2 back away for the line. He tells me "your terrible, it's your job to tell B1 to back up". Whack!

Now here's where I need your input.... At half time, my partner proceeds to tell me that "I need to have thicker skin, he's been working men's leagues (almost exclusively) for years and to let these guys blow off steam and it's not the same as a HS game". I agreed with him that it's not same as HS game but as a referee, almost anytime a sentence starts with your______, will probably get T'd. When I used to play in that league, I'd see guys go off an he'd just take it. He says they respect him for that and I say that they now know my tolerence level, respect me or not.

What's your thoughts?
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Old Mon Nov 15, 2004, 10:05am
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I don't do men's leagues (except when a friend is short of officials) for exactly that reason, Chris. You are expected to let the morons, I mean, crybabies, uh, pathetic wannabees, no no, players blow off steam at you. Knowing your tolerance level will probably not lessen the frequency of their outbursts.

So you can continue to do the league and just resign yourself to throwing a few T's every week, or you can avoid those leagues and let your thick-skinned former partner have all their respect.

Neither decision is wrong. It's just a matter of what you want deal with.
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Old Mon Nov 15, 2004, 10:08am
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You don't have to compromise your principles just because it's rec vs. high school. If your partner wants to take that crap, well, that's up to him- even though he's making the job of the other officials working this league that much harder imo.

Most rec leagues are the same. If you take crap, the players will quickly recognize that and they will make sure that you are are given crap- endlessly. Respect your partner? Nah, don't think so. If they did, they wouldn't be yapping at him.

I would have done the same as you, Chris- "T"ed the little sh*t up.
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Old Mon Nov 15, 2004, 10:09am
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If you're whacking someone every time they use the word "you," you must be calling a lot of technicals.

I would agree with your partner to some extent. I wouldn't have T'ed him but I would probably have given the player a little smarta$$ answer of my own. When dealing with MJ wannabes, you sometimes just need to let them know you aren't going to take their crap and they'll back off.

"No, you're terrible. You let him take steal the ball. Now back up and try it again."
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Old Mon Nov 15, 2004, 10:22am
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Quote:
Originally posted by BktBallRef
If you're whacking someone every time they use the word "you," you must be calling a lot of technicals.

I would agree with your partner to some extent. I wouldn't have T'ed him but I would probably have given the player a little smarta$$ answer of my own. When dealing with MJ wannabes, you sometimes just need to let them know you aren't going to take their crap and they'll back off.

"No, you're terrible. You let him take steal the ball. Now back up and try it again."
I rarely rarely have a need to call T's wherever I work, (holy cow, this will probably be a long week now) this is the first I've seen in this league in 24 games, and NO I'm not acustomed to being addressed with comments like "your____". I told my partner that if he wants to take it, then I'm done here (he schedules for the gym) because he makes it tougher on the rest of us. I took these game specifically to work on game management and the first 5 weeks were smooth as butta, this guy got out of line, so I managed him.
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Old Mon Nov 15, 2004, 11:27am
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Quote:
Originally posted by ChrisSportsFan
Men's competitive rec league .... When I used to play in that league, I'd see guys go off an he'd just take it. He says they respect him for that and I say that they now know my tolerence level, respect me or not.

What's your thoughts?
Competitive or Recreational league??? I'm thinking that it can't be both.

"he'd just take it. He says they respect him for that..."

Well, there's your sign.

He's an idiot! People in positions of authority don't earn respect by letting people yell at them... especially when they are wrong.

Yelling? Perhaps. but when all is said and done, they have got to know that they were wrong (per the rules) and that yelling is not necessary. Penalty for loosing your composure and yelling at the official? Technical foul. Now do you want to talk or yell some more? Yell? Another technical foul and you're gone.

Don't change your position Chris. Unless you can laugh back at them (which will piss them off all the more - and sometimes that is fun), I would stick with the T-bone. And by all means try to explain in a calm manner so that they understand the T is payment for the yelling but if you want to discuss why I made the original call, we'll do that in a calm manner.
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Old Mon Nov 15, 2004, 12:10pm
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Thumbs down I don't do this level of ball...

what is the real reason the league wants refs? if it's for control and game management.....then the program has got to all play by the same rules....otherwise, there are plenty of other activities that are more productive and fun than subjecting yourself to this abuse.

you basically are doing this "for the money"....if that's your thing.....have at it. heaven knows those ego maniacs still need "babysitting" service and if you like babysitting, you are a saint!

wl
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Old Mon Nov 15, 2004, 04:28pm
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Personally, I enjoy working Adult Rec leagues. Admittedly, for the money first but also because that the level of play can be quite competitive. I do not compromise when it comes to the enforcement of the rules and believe that the game management is easier to maintain because of this.

I don't buy into the the notion that one needs to be "thick-skinned" to be a respected official in Rec leagues. I understand that players in these leagues tend to blow off steam in various ways including running their mouths at officials. I do not tolerate this any different that I would a typical HS game.

When the "thick-skinned" mentality is invoked, it is not uncommon to see things get heated up to the level of fisticuffs when that type of official does NOT enforce the rules correctly and consistently.

I have had great success in manageing adult games in spite of the occaisonal terrible partner. More often than not, a good official will rub off onto a poor official and the crew will be better as a result. I welcome the opportunity to "chat" with marginal partners in an effort to help them improve.

Even if the marginal partner is the assignor for the gym, good communication is a great elixir. It may not be a cure-all for the thick skin thinking but at least your partner (assignor) will know your philosophies and principles about how you view your officiating duties. My guess is that he will either respect you for that communication or not invite you back in the future.

I want to encourage you to not get a bad taste in your mouth for Adult Rec because of this experience. Be professional and have fun as much as possible but don't get caught up in all the negative stuff. As an official YOU have a chance to improve the quality of the league simply by being a good official....regardless if that is even a goal of yours going in.

If all else fails and you still want to work that gym, survey the other crew members and ask to limit your schedule to those officials.
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