Conflict Resolution

[JJ]

I've been requested to do a clinic topic on Conflict Resolution, and I'm looking for some suggestions. Having umpired for a LOT of years I've developed my "style", and I realize a couple of things -
1. Consider the source - who you are having the "conversation" with, what they are saying, how they are saying it and why;
2. Be a good listener regardless.
3. It's pointless to try to be "louder".
How about a few of YOUR ideas? Thanks!

[3appleshigh]

That the key to dealing with Conflicts on the field is to begin the meeting without the assumption that "you are right." This aids the listening process and will help you identify where they are wrong if thats the case as they are in most instances. The key is not to vocalize it. Assume that you are wrong, listen to what they say and then point out what is incorrect in thier thinking. This will most often show why you are right. Or make the right call if what they have pointed out is the case. The belief that an ump naver changes their call is A) faulty, and B) not good for the game, but be ready to deal with some crap when you have to change a call due to your error.

The coaches then see that you are willing to listen and explain things they are less likely to bother you during play and you may have a ew more pleasent conversations between innings where no problems realy ever occur.

Also some small things that you can do to calm situations early,

A) give the Time as requested,
B) try to meet the coach half way (physically) between the dugout and your position, Do not appear heated or smug.
C) Allow them to vent a little when they are near you. A coach up close can do a heck of a lot more than a coach still in the duggout screaming can at my ball field.
d) Wait until they are finished speaking until you talk.
E) If they simply are yelling, tell them to stop and ask thier question and you would be happy to answer any questions.
F) Do not be afraid to throw out the Coach! This is a big one, if it is preceived that you are afraid to toss a coach you will be walked on. Do not abuse it, but if your in the middle thinking this guys crazy, he has lost it, or you can no longer get him to understand and he doesn't seem to be stopping, toss him. A warning will often work, but you have to be willing to act on the warning.

[YoungRighty]

I will answer this as a coach, as my experience on that side of the fence is much greater than as an umpire.

The two things that would upset me more than anything else in trying to have a discussion with an umpire were:
1) smugness or arrogance
2) interrupting me before I could finish a point that I was trying to make

So I guess I'm chiming in with hearty endorsements of (b) and (d) in the previous post.

The thing that would always shut me up quick when I was agitated was an umpire who would calmly say "coach, I'm happy to talk to you about this, but please, let's do it from three feet, not 30 feet, and let's do it calmly". This would always shame me into the proper demeanor and would help us get the issue resolved effectively.

[DownTownTonyBrown]

I worked for and I've seen others get thoroughly abused by a coach who will just not shut up and continues to harp the same issue over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over... that's got kind of a rhythm to it!

For this kind of engagement, an official has got to be able to say STOP! Coach I heard you, and this is my answer. NOW WE ARE DONE WITH THAT SUBJECT. Let's move on.

Any further ... comments on the 'over and over' issue must be penalized - either to the dugout or gone. The umpire is the one that says STOP. And it must STOP. Nothing else is possibly acceptable; the umpire must control the game and NOT THE COACH.

Otherwise, you've got to treat a coach as a person so you can be treated as a person. If you treat a coach in any other method besides respectfully, you will likely be treated something besides respectfully too. This, of course means that when you say "this is my answer" it has got to be a good and respectful answer. It cannot be "sit down and shut up coach."

Now I have said before "I've heard enough umpiring coming from this dugout gentlemen. It is time for you to be players and coaches. I'll do the umpiring; nothing else would be fair for the other team." That's pretty close to sit down and shut up... but much more respectful.

Confidence. An umpire has got to have confidence that he is doing the right thing and making the right calls... if you are unsure, you are going to get slaughtered... or shall we say bloody.

Here's to a season of bloodless games!

[Rich]

Originally posted by YoungRighty
I will answer this as a coach, as my experience on that side of the fence is much greater than as an umpire.

The two things that would upset me more than anything else in trying to have a discussion with an umpire were:
1) smugness or arrogance
2) interrupting me before I could finish a point that I was trying to make

So I guess I'm chiming in with hearty endorsements of (b) and (d) in the previous post.

The thing that would always shut me up quick when I was agitated was an umpire who would calmly say "coach, I'm happy to talk to you about this, but please, let's do it from three feet, not 30 feet, and let's do it calmly". This would always shame me into the proper demeanor and would help us get the issue resolved effectively.

How about when the coach tries to make the same point for the fourth time?

I really don't have a problem with coaches that are experienced and do it for a living. It's the ones who are doing it because nobody else wants to that are the wild card to umpires.

[PeteBooth]

Originally posted by JJ


I've been requested to do a clinic topic on Conflict Resolution, and I'm looking for some suggestions. Having umpired for a LOT of years I've developed my "style", and I realize a couple of things -
1. Consider the source - who you are having the "conversation" with, what they are saying, how they are saying it and why;
2. Be a good listener regardless.
3. It's pointless to try to be "louder".
How about a few of YOUR ideas? Thanks!

At my last HS associating meeting we watched a mechanic tape given by Gerry Davis. In the tape they have what they call the "Question of the Week" The question posed to Major League Umpires was "What is the difference between a Good umpire vs. an Excellent Umpire"

The overwhelming answer was "Handling the Game and the particpants (people) playing the game" In other words obviously The Major League Level is a "different animal" but the point of the response was "Handle people based on the level or type of ball you call"

For Example: If it's a Non-Competitive League vs. a Very Competitive League you would handle different.

People watch TV and think it's OK for coaches to come out and question "everything", therefore we should make it a point to not allow coaches to come out and question judgement calls as they do in the PROS.

If you are on the bases and make a call that a coach doesn't like, after the inning you simply head down the right field line. Very rarely will an experienced coach follow you (chase you down) as that gives the impression that the coach is confrontational. Remember it takes 2 to argue, so don't argue, simply go about your business.

The plate is a little different in that you can't wander too far, but the general rule is stand on the opposite side of where the questionable call came from. Example; if there was a bang bang play at the plate, and you called the runner safe, stand on offensive side as the teams change, conversely, if you called the runner out especially to end the inning, stand on the defensive side.

In reality, a coach can only come out to question rule interpretations and that's when we should give an explanation without being arrogant or unapproachable.

Also, IMO, too many rookie umpires, "threaten coaches" meaning they use phrases such as "Hey Coach if you do that again you are gone" or something along those lines.

I would stress the "Line-up" card technique in your conflict resolution clinic. In other words, Have a "one on one" with the coach by initially requesting his presence to check out a line-up question. Once it's just you and the coach, then you can say something like "Ok skip you had your say it's time to play ball" or something similar to get your point across. It's just you and the coach so you are not "showing him up".

Another mistake rookie umpires make is "hanging around after the game is over". Once the game is over, Greet your partner and head for your car. Do not look for accolades if you think you called a good game, conversely don't be a "target" if you had a bad game. Also, the BU umpire should leave At the same time as the PU. In other words, the PU has to take off all the equipment, etc. so don't leave your partner alone.

In summary, for most situations it's best to simply ignore the coaches comments UNLESS THEY ARE DEGRADING . Regardless "if it was a bad call or not" no-one deserves to be degraded or rediculed. In that case you have no choice but to eject the coach immediately.

Pete Booth

[Rich]

Another mistake rookie umpires make is "hanging around after the game is over". Once the game is over, Greet your partner and head for your car. Do not look for accolades if you think you called a good game, conversely don't be a "target" if you had a bad game. Also, the BU umpire should leave At the same time as the PU. In other words, the PU has to take off all the equipment, etc. so don't leave your partner alone.

I work a lot of adult amateur baseball (I work 3 leagues, the biggest of which has 45 teams), and I've learned more about players and their mentality in the past year than in my first 15 years of umpiring.

How? Well, about 80-90% of the time my partner and I stick around after the game and the players buy us beer and vice-versa. The only times we don't stay is when we have a bad situation and then it's understood why we leave.

In the past season I've learned that a lot of the adults out there aren't rats, aren't as dumb as most umpires think they are, and really do appreciate hard work and effort. Many realize that we need umpiring the same way they need to play.

That said, my recommendation for better game management is to remember that the players are human beings who are entitled to your best effort and answers to questions they have. They also deserve for you to be fair and firm when poor sportsmanship happens.

--Rich