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Perhaps the glove can be an instrument used by the UIC for reaching up the umpire's a$$ who wears it to pull out his teeth.
And with the hook, I can see it now... "Hey, Blue? Are you going to buy my catcher a nose job and a new eyeball? It was your hook that caused that damage when she fell over because she tripped on your mask that you tossed aside. Yes Blue, your mask. The one lying there on the chalk line."
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