Texas

[whiskers_ump]

This has absolutely nothing to do with umpiring...However,
should some you be out of your State and in Texas calling a
tournament, at least you will be able to understand some of
what we are saying>>>

Roadrunners don't say "Beep Beep".

There are 10,000 types of spiders. 10,001 live in
Texas.

Raccoons will test your crop of melons and let you know
when they are ripe.

If it grows, it sticks; if it crawls, it bites.

Nothing will kill a mesquite tree.

Pecan is pronounced "puhcon".

A tractor is NOT an all-terrain vehicle. They do get stuck.

The wind blows from Oct. 2 until July 15, then it stops
totally. (This does not apply to West Texas.)

Onced and Twiced are words.

It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy.

Fire ants consider your flesh as a picnic and they
multiply even faster than rabbits.

Coldbeer is one word. [This I am sure will understand]

People actually grow and eat Okra - - and what's more,
they like it.

Texans really don't have an accent - it's the rest of
the world that talks funny.

When the world ends, only cockroaches and mesquite trees
will survive.

When you live in the country, you don't have to buy a
dog. City people drop them off at your gate in the middle of the night.

The sound of coyotes howling at night only sounds good
for the first couple of weeks. After that, you don't even notice them
anymore.

When a buzzard sits on the fence and stares at you, it's
time to go to the doctor.

A tank is a dirt hole in the ground that holds water for
irrigation and is drinkable to most of the livestock .

"Bakards and Forards" means I know everything about a
subject or the way to go if you're giving directions.

Opossum is pronounced "possum" and resembles a big
hairless rat.

"Fixnto" is one word - - and probably one of the most
used words in the true Texan's vocabulary.

glen

[Steve M]

Glen,
Sounds like you Texans are somewhat close kin to them folks in West Viginia. Y'all use alotta the same words.

[oppool]

Just a few more to add to Glen list

As for directions remember
Upthere= North
downthere=South
overthere=west
overyonder=east

When you pull into the ballpark parking lot dont worry about all those trucks with the rifles hanging we only use them for hunting. Its the pistol carry that is legal in Texas that you need to worry about

Make sure you know how to properly use the word "aint" it is a regualar part of the vocabulary here

Wouldnt hurt to know spanish and be ready to eat Mexican food. Would recommend a bottle of Pepo at least

You will know when you enter Texas is when you see no more Indians you have left Oklahoma and see all the big cowboy hats you have enter Texas. There is also a Red River that divides.

When you see a 3 million dollar house whose neighbor lives in a trailer house than you know your in Texas

In Texas being called a "Redneck" is a compliment


That all for now

Don

[whiskers_ump]

Don,
Thanks for the additions, some were definiately
needs to be. Sure gald you educated them
on the pistola - rifle thing also. Plumb embarassing
forgitten that. ,

glen

[Roger Greene]

Talking about firearms and ball games: Two stories I've got to share,

From an 1896 newspaper artilce of a ballgame in New Jersey between Clifton and Little falls.

"The pitcher named Connelly got so mad at Umpire Mahoney's strike zone that he picked up a bat and headed for the umpire. Mahoney yanked his revolver out of his coat pocket, and warned the pitcher that if he took one more step, he would shoot his nose off. Connelly returned at once to the mound and the game continued with no further complaints." (I'm sure the nose is the body part that the umpire threatened to shoot, aint yall?)

And a 5/16/1896 Wheeling, West Virginia newspaper:

"At Vivian, on the Norfolk & Western Railroad to-day, a gang of miners, off for a half holiday, engaged in a game of base ball. A player named Jim Carrigan tried to make a home run, but was declared out at home plate by Umpire Charley Hunt. This so enraged Carrigan that he went home, got his shotgun and fired a load of buckshot into the umpire, inflicting wounds which will probably kill him. A new umpire was substituted and the game went on, Carrigan taking part in it."

The moral of this story is, if one of the "rats" shoots you, make sure you eject him before you pass out!!!

(Thanks to Steve Cutchen for sharing this with UT last July.)

Roger Greene

[SamNVa]

Glen,

Thanks for the vocabulary refresher.

Livin up heya in Northern Virginnie, I don't geta heya too much downhome talkin, ceptin' when I give my cousins in Lubbock a hallar, but yall fergot to mention that yall is both singular and plural. Now I got to go fix me some cornbread an beans fer supper. See yall later.

SamC

[Elaine "Lady Blue"]

Well sir, us folks in Georgia share the Texas vocabulary in all ways. Did anyone mention fixin' to? I use over yonder for about any direction, but you must point 'over yonder' when saying it. We uns have fire ants, too! Plus many critters that have migrated from Florida and Texas such as the famous road meat, armadillo, and pesky coyotoes. (sp?)
Luckily, I live about 20 miles from Atlanta in a civilized area as the contractors have wiped out the wooded areas for malls, malls, more malls, and subdivisions. It USED to be
nice and rural. I didn't even mind the occasional cows in heat with the bulls roaring at night, the cock-a-doodle-dos,
and deer wandering into our yards. Not anymore. Ifen I didn't want to drive a heap more to my day job, I would move
further out into the boonies.

[whiskers_ump]

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Elaine "Lady Blue"
[B]Well sir, us folks in Georgia share the Texas vocabulary in all ways. Did anyone mention fixin' to?

Yes'm we surely deed, it was the last line of my
originial post, pard....just a funnin u all. U
hava nice day now.


glen