JOKES!!!

[Dan_ref]

Originally Posted by Andy

Jesus was playing golf with Moses. First hole, both tee off and are in the fairway. The next shot is about 200 yards to the green with a pond directly in front of the green.

Jesus is away and he says, "Arnold Palmer would use a 5 iron for this shot." Jesus pulls the 5 iron out of his bag, hits the shot, and watches it land right in the middle of the pond. Jesus asks Moses to go get the ball for him. Moses walks up to the pond, spreads his hands apart, the pond waters part, and Moses walks in and picks up Jesus' ball.

Jesus prepares to hit the shot again, same result, right in the pond, Moses gets the ball and returns it to Jesus. This happens several more times....

Finally, the next group waiting on the tee is getting impatient and sends someone up to see what the holdup is.

The golfer says to Moses, "Let's go, willya?!?...Who does this guy think he is, Jesus Christ?!?!?"

Moses replies.....







"No, he thinks he's ARNOLD PALMER!"

Jesus, Moses & St Peter were playing golf 1 fine day in heaven.

At the first tee Jesus hits the ball and it slices far off into the woods, where it bounces off a tree it rolls by a bunny. The bunny hops after it and picks it up in its mouth & hops off...when out of nowehere an eagle appears in the sky and swoops down to quickly grab the bunny & head skyward. As the eagle flies off and is only a speck in the sky thunderclouds appear on the horizon. As the clouds mass thunder is heard, and suddenly a loud clap and a bolt of lightning hits the eagle which drops the bunny which hits the ground on the green causing the ball to pop out of it's mouth. The ball rolls into the cup.

Moses turns to Jesus and says:

"Are you here to play golf or screw around"?