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Good Lines to use on coaches
Share some lines you all say to coaches that leave them speechless.
Example: Here is one from the other night, Coach is complaining about a petty foul, and he is already winning big, wing guy says to him, "Sorry, coach I must have missed that one, the scoreboard got in my way." Home team coach wants a measurement on an obvious 1st down, wing man says, "Coach, is your field legally marked?" Coach says, "Well yeah", wingman says, "Then its a 1st down, move the chains." |
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Had a JV game last week where the team on my sideline was winning 35-6 in the 4th and was still trying to throw...a wasn't being very successful at it.
I sidled up to the coach and very quietly said.."Coach, you do realize that incomplete passes stop the clock right?" He got the message... |
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I got a fever! And the only prescription.. is more cowbell! |
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Not a line used on a coach but it did get him in a better mood with a laugh. The coach was letting the LJ have it over a call. Finally the LJ had enough of this coach and yelled to the Ref to "come over and get you some of this."
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From my 1st season...
7th grade B-game played on a Monday night. Really sloppy. I was getting 9 kinds of hell from a particular coach, who was losing huge, but I was too new to do anything about it. Finally during a timeout where he's chewing me out, veteran VERY-down-south Referee comes over to join the "discussion". "Coach, we've had enough. Stop acting like you think you're on Monday Night Football." He then looks at his watch, and says, "Nevermind coach - this is Monday Night Football... you go right ahead." Got the guy laughing at least, and off my backside the rest of the way.
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"Many baseball fans look upon an umpire as a sort of necessary evil to the luxury of baseball, like the odor that follows an automobile." - Hall of Fame Pitcher Christy Mathewson |
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1A/2A conference game- good highly-ranked team at
a school that has had some rough years but is putting together a decent season and improving.
Ranked school HC is all over our arses all night from the opening kick-off- didn't like the chains off the sideline, wanted us to call 12 breaking the huddle (we're Fed), and middle of the 4th quarter when they finally get a decent lead he starts telling me we should be starting the clock on the ready after change of possession. My reply- "Coach, if you want the game called your way, we need to move to Saturday. We can both make a lot more money." Ahhhh, blessed silence |
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In a HS varsity game one assistant is screaming at my BJ most of the first half. The BJ walked up the assistant and asked if he was the Head Coach, of course he said no, so the BJ then said please be quiet I don't talk to caddies. Left the coach speechless
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Where do they speak like this? Bob |
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Or: Please come hither, and partake in this excellent verbal tharshing this fine young lad is allowing me to be the subject of. |
Bookmarks |
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