Coach refuses to shake hands

[Chris Whitten]

What would you do if a coach shook hands with opposing captain and coach, but refused to shake your hand in the coaches/captains meeting before tip-off? I was involved in a previous game that did not end well for him.

[BktBallRef]

Ignore it. Work the game as you would any other.

Be the bigger man.

[Raymond]

Well, for that game, that's one HC who's not get any questions answered nor allowed any leeway if he steps outside the box and makes any type of comments.

[RefCT]

I guess he can't truthfully answer the "we can expect good sportsmanship from everyone" question.

[BillyMac]

Originally Posted by BktBallRef

Ignore it. Work the game as you would any other. Be the bigger man.

Agree 100%.

[JRutledge]

Tell him I refuse to answer any questions because of his display when he is asking a question and move on. Then see how all that works out for him.

Peace

[Rich]

I may not explicitly say this to the coach, but that would end my communication for the game. And the rope would be really, really short.

[Rich1]

Do nothing different. If he wants to hold a grudge over a basketball game and behave immaturely then its on him. I'll call the game the same either way. Be professional, answer questions, make calls, and interact with him and his team just like you would if you had never met before. I also use this same philosophy when I have a coach or team that is "rumored" to be difficult. I may be more aware but I won't go in looking for problems.

[JRutledge]

Originally Posted by Rich1

Do nothing different. If he wants to hold a grudge over a basketball game and behave immaturely then its on him. I'll call the game the same either way. Be professional, answer questions, make calls, and interact with him and his team just like you would if you had never met before. I also use this same philosophy when I have a coach or team that is "rumored" to be difficult. I may be more aware but I won't go in looking for problems.

You can be professional and tell a coach "what's up." They just decided to do something much earlier. I would not disrespect a coach, but he certainly would know why I feel the way I do. He would have to apologize, but I would not just not talk to a coach and he not know why. That is the ultimate disrespect to refuse to shake someone's hand and do so publicly. If this was any other profession, I would stop doing business with them or report it to them to the higher ups. I just have to deal with them for at most a couple of hours and then I go home. Coaches need to know their behavior has consequences.

Peace

[BillyMac]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

... report it to the higher ups.

Good idea. Here, in my little corner of Connecticut, the procedure would be to report the situation to our assigner, who would contact the school's athletic director.

[bainsey]

I would do nothing at the time, but keep it in the back of my head that he may become problematic.

[Adam]

The game started with a clean slate. The coach decided to be a prick, and it doesn't matter to me whether he did it at the coach's meeting or after the first foul call against his team. His actions for this game have determined the level of courtesy he will be given, which is pretty much nil. Obviously, it isn't going to affect how I'm going to call the game; but he's made it clear he isn't going to work with me if I need help dealing with a player or his bench. That's fine, I can go straight to the tools provided in the book.

[Ed Maeder]

Is this what officiating is about? Being vindictive. Work the game like any other and keep your emotions aside. We have to be bigger then that. Report and move on.

[Rich]

Originally Posted by Ed Maeder

Is this what officiating is about? Being vindictive. Work the game like any other and keep your emotions aside. We have to be bigger then that. Report and move on.

It's not vindictive. A coach decided he didn't wish to have a professional relationship. That's OK, but that just means I won't go out of my way to communicate with him.

Actually, I would be surprised at such behavior. Never had a coach act this way before a game.

[jTheUmp]

Originally Posted by Rich

It's not vindictive. A coach decided he didn't wish to have a professional relationship. That's OK, but that just means I won't go out of my way to communicate with him.

Actually, I would be surprised at such behavior. Never had a coach act this way before a game.

I've had it happen a couple of times, although it was either a) youth wreck ball (back when I used to work youth wreck ball) or b) a JV game. Never happened at the varsity level.

Of course, in the case of the JV game, that coach had been served T in the two prior games I'd worked for his team (once by me, once by my partner). In the 3rd game, he opened the pregame conference with "Oh, it's you again" in a tone that basically said "I'm gonna get a T in this game also". And he did not disappoint. He also did not return as coach the following season.