just a little note- travel and coaches

[BryanV21]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

Well I know I am not trying to develop a close relationship with a coach, which is the definition of "rapport." I am doing a job and if they want an explanation, I do not need a rapport to accomplish just that.

You also said that being sarcastic is counter-productive, but I do that all the time. I usually get a laugh from those very coaches you claim it would take the game to a bad place by using such sarcasm.

Maybe you do not understand that everyone's approach is not your approach. And most of us understand that if we have been around a long time. Just watch guys on TV that work games and see how different their approach, body language or even the way they talk to players or coaches is and it works for each differently. It is about the delivery, not if sarcasm is used or not.

Peace

1. Having a "close relationship" is not the definition of "rapport". If you want to be technical, Merriam-Webster defines "rapport" as being "relation marked by harmony, conformity, accord, or affinity". You don't have to be best friends, or even like one-another to have a good rapport.

2. I should have said that being sarcastic could be counter-productive. I did say you could do so after having already gained a rapport with a coach, and it wouldn't be taken the wrong way. So while I did misspeak, I think my point should have still come through.

AremRed said it best... agree to disagree.

[JRutledge]

Originally Posted by BryanV21

1. Having a "close relationship" is not the definition of "rapport". If you want to be technical, Merriam-Webster defines "rapport" as being "relation marked by harmony, conformity, accord, or affinity". You don't have to be best friends, or even like one-another to have a good rapport.

Maybe you need to look up the actual definition of the word, rather then stating something as jargon and expecting everyone to be clear with what you mean.

Originally Posted by BryanV21

2. I should have said that being sarcastic could be counter-productive. I did say you could do so after having already gained a rapport with a coach, and it wouldn't be taken the wrong way. So while I did misspeak, I think my point should have still come through.

Answering every question a coach has can also be counter-productive. Because if one coach is quiet and one coach constantly needs attention, the quiet coach might not think highly of that official.

Originally Posted by BryanV21

AremRed said it best... agree to disagree.

I was not trying to get you to agree with me. You are going to do what you want to do anyway. I was stating my opinion on the topic.

Peace

[BryanV21]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

Maybe you need to look up the actual definition of the word, rather then stating something as jargon and expecting everyone to be clear with what you mean.

I need to look up the definition? I would have sworn I pasted the definition of the word from Merriam-Webster. If you don't agree with the definition, your beef is with Merriam-Webster, not with me.

[JRutledge]

Originally Posted by BryanV21

I need to look up the definition? I would have sworn I pasted the definition of the word from Merriam-Webster. If you don't agree with the definition, your beef is with Merriam-Webster, not with me.

rap·port
raˈpôr,rə-/
noun
1.
a close and harmonious relationship in which the people or groups concerned understand each other's feelings or ideas and communicate well.
"she was able to establish a good rapport with the children"
synonyms: affinity, close relationship, understanding, mutual understanding, bond, empathy, sympathy, accord More

Peace

[BryanV21]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

rap·port
raˈpôr,rə-/
noun
1.
a close and harmonious relationship in which the people or groups concerned understand each other's feelings or ideas and communicate well.
"she was able to establish a good rapport with the children"
synonyms: affinity, close relationship, understanding, mutual understanding, bond, empathy, sympathy, accord More

Peace

That's good that you can concentrate on two words in the definition, but ignore the other 42.

[JRutledge]

Originally Posted by BryanV21

That's good that you can concentrate on two words in the definition, but ignore the other 42.

If you do not agree that is fine. I am not trying to build a rapport with a coach. I want to be professional with what they ask and expect them to do the same. I do not have the same goals for the game that they do. They think they can say something to us and we are influenced. They are often mistaken and not my concern to have them like what they hear from me. If that is your approach, so be it. Just understand a lot of officials could give a damn and are fine.

mutual understanding

When are we going to have mutual understanding. If a coach feels you are wrong, you are not going to always change their mind by telling them something.

bond

What bond do I want to have with a coach? I might get a bond, but in the game not my goal. I develop bonds with coaches after being around them in several games and they realize I am doing my job and not much else. Most coaches will respect that fact.

empathy, sympathy

Not sure why I would have to have either of these things. Again I am not a coach and I know they can get frustrated, but I am not the whipping boy for them. If they want information I will give it to them. But feeling these things are not going to change the fact their team cannot stop turning the ball over or taking bad shots.

Peace

[BryanV21]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

If you do not agree that is fine. I am not trying to build a rapport with a coach. I want to be professional with what they ask and expect them to do the same. I do not have the same goals for the game that they do. They think they can say something to us and we are influenced. They are often mistaken and not my concern to have them like what they hear from me. If that is your approach, so be it. Just understand a lot of officials could give a damn and are fine.

Peace

Like other comments before it, this response tells me that you are not getting what I'm saying. Building a rapport has NOTHING to do with being friends, or being "chummy" as you once put it. You're simply figuring out a way to work with one another, so if a question or concern comes up you can take care of them without any misunderstandings or ill feelings, which could affect other things down the road.

I don't know another way to go, either. So I guess this is where our conversation ends.