S/Os and the schedule

[bainsey]

Originally Posted by amusedofficial

I made the mistake of saying "if I take this schedule, we can re-do the kitchen" only to find that to "re-do" the kitchen involved guys with cement trucks.

Been married 21 years. Sometimes, what was inferred is not what was said.

I've been fortunate. I do three sports. My wife generally only wants to know when I'll be home, and she plans around it. Like Adam's wife, mine probably wouldn't like it if I weren't getting paid. She'll ask me to block certain dates occassionally, and I've also blocked dates this year based on my son's basketball schedule. (He's a senior. No chance I'm missing those games.)

As already stated, people are individuals, and marriage requires communication. You have to work on your own give-and-take. As passionate as we are about the game, remember the role it fits in your life, and those around you.

[Adam]

Originally Posted by bainsey

I've been fortunate. I do three sports. My wife generally only wants to know when I'll be home, and she plans around it.

Yeah, mine too. She doesn't care what time my games start anymore (unless it's the one game per year she takes the kids to watch). I've learned this year (not sure why it took so long) that when she asks my schedule, she wants to know what time I need to leave the house (if I'm even coming home at all before my game) and what time I expect to be home.

In return, she's learned that the time I expect to get home is just an estimate.

The biggest key for me is that as much as I love to officiate; I a husband and father first.

[SE Minnestoa Re]

I've been married 32 years. I finished football last week and have about 4 weeks until basketball starts. I know if will be about two weeks before the wife asks when basketball starts because she is sick of me being around the house so much.

I was officiating before we got married and my schedules have only gotten larger over the years. I cut back about 10 basketball dates (I know have about 30) a few years ago, but it was because I wanted to, not her.

Other colleagues do not have such an understanding wife as I do.

And by the way, our bathroom remodel job is just about done, all paid for in cash by officiating revenues.

[JugglingReferee]

There has been numerous divorces in the basketball officiating world in Ontario. To so many people reffing is more worthwhile.

An understanding SO is key. And my twice-yearly "guy's weekend" (one in each sport) is an officiating weekend where we combine officiating and the local nightlife; it's the best of both worlds.

And paying cash for home improvements is awesome!

[deecee]

When I had a significant other during the season I didn't find that working the games were so much an issue as long as the time spent together is worthwhile for them.

[Scratch85]

Been married 28 years and as far as I know, my wife doesn't mind my refereeing. I am pretty sure my wife finds refereeing less offensive than what I do when I'm not refereeing. Win/Win for both of us!