Good luck or not?

[Adam]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

I cannot. But then again this was not the practice when I lived. I do remember when people will not shake my hand in and out of officiating. It tells me something about their relationship with me or maybe what they think of me. And yes it is usually not a positive interaction, which is why I continue to say, if you purposely ignore someone trying to give you a handshake that will be remembered by some longer than you think.

Peace

I don't think anyone here has advocated ignoring a handshake attempt. I may have missed it, though.

[RookieDude]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

I just think it looks silly to deny a kid or coach a handshake when they come to you.

C'mon man...

Who said anything about DENYING a handshake...some of us (and some states and associations) just would prefer it be eliminated from the pre-game formality. No biggy either way...so we can all just relax.

I gotta go do a double header...and fist bump some kids tonight.

[26 Year Gap]

I wasn't talking about ignoring or walking away from an attempt. I still remember a couple of opponents who refused to shake hands and put their hand behind their backs. That was in HS many years ago.

[stir22]

Originally Posted by 26 Year Gap

I still remember a couple of opponents who refused to shake hands and put their hand behind their backs. That was in HS many years ago.

interesting. how did that game go?

[Adam]

Originally Posted by bainsey

"High horse" is indeed an effective methaphor, but it's often used by those who don't want to meet a standard.

I deleted it because it was over the top; I apologize.

You're half-wrong (by omission) about when it's used. It's used when someone presents a standard that's ridiculous.

Originally Posted by bainsey

Yes, that's my opinion, but that's not what I said. I said "much of what we do has a ripple effect." That's a fact.

And out of context, your statement is almost a truism. It's true because it's so vague.
In context, it's silly opinion, because you're saying that RD's expression of dislike for this particular ceremony has a ripple effect on sportsmanship with players who will never read this board.

If you really believe this, then I take back my statement that it was hyperbole.

It's stupid.

Originally Posted by bainsey

So shaking hands is now a crappy move? Wow, you're cynical, and that's my opinion.

I didn't say it was a crappy move. Thinking it has any bearing on a player's sportsmanship is crap (hyperbolic metaphor). Compared to actually teaching and modeling sportsmanship, it's crap. Kids see through it. Shaking hands is pointless without the teaching; and it's not necessary with it.

Originally Posted by bainsey

Certainly, one who shakes my hand one minute is not going to get away with cursing me out the next, but that's very rare, and I will remember the handshake, because the kids made a effort -- mandated or otherwise -- to be sportsmanlike. That's something that needs to be respected, not scrutinized.

I don't remember which teams shake my hand and which ones don't. If my wife asked me when I got home from the game, I probably wouldn't remember. I don't scrutinize it, either.

I think the idea of hiding from them is silly. But I also think it's silly to give too much credence to a formality.

[JRutledge]

Originally Posted by RookieDude

C'mon man...

Who said anything about DENYING a handshake...some of us (and some states and associations) just would prefer it be eliminated from the pre-game formality. No biggy either way...so we can all just relax.

I gotta go do a double header...and fist bump some kids tonight.

It is not that important to me, but I believe someone said they would not do it if they were put into that situation or would go to great measures to not have to handshake. And no I do not recall it being you that said this first or when as we are almost at the double digit page level of this thread. And I am not sure who put it in the formalities at all, it seems like someone decided to do it and others followed. I see it as a gesture to us when they shake the opponents and coach's hands. Again, do not see the big deal even if it is contrived.

Peace

[bainsey]

Originally Posted by Snaqwells

I deleted it because it was over the top; I apologize.

Accepted.

In context, it's silly opinion, because you're saying that RD's expression of dislike for this particular ceremony has a ripple effect on sportsmanship with players who will never read this board.

No sir, that's not what I said. Go take another look. I said, the ripple effect comes from our actions on the court, not from an opinion here.

I didn't say it was a crappy move. Thinking it has any bearing on a player's sportsmanship is crap (hyperbolic metaphor). Compared to actually teaching and modeling sportsmanship, it's crap. Kids see through it. Shaking hands is pointless without the teaching; and it's not necessary with it.

Pointless without? Certainly, then it reeks of being disingenuous. Not necessary? Perhaps. However, I believe it's typically a part of a coach's standard for teaching sportsmanship. Until you have evidence otherwise, you'd have to go with that. Will some kids shake your hand reluctantly? Certainly. But, they'll typically get it as they grow.

I don't remember which teams shake my hand and which ones don't. If my wife asked me when I got home from the game, I probably wouldn't remember.

Therein lies the difference. I certainly would. Perhaps not a month or two later, but that night? Absolutely. I have a lot of respect those who choose to step it up.

[Adam]

[QUOTE=bainsey;720140]No sir, that's not what I said. Go take another look. I said, the ripple effect comes from our actions on the court, not from an opinion here.[quote]
But the context was about a comment made on this board by someone who had already indicated he allows the handshakes in spite of his personal preference.

You wrote, "to even suggest that...." That's what I called hyperbole (from the beginning), and I stand by that now; given what you wrote above.

Originally Posted by bainsey

Pointless without? Certainly, then it reeks of being disingenuous. Not necessary? Perhaps. However, I believe it's typically a part of a coach's standard for teaching sportsmanship. Until you have evidence otherwise, you'd have to go with that. Will some kids shake your hand reluctantly? Certainly. But, they'll typically get it as they grow.

There's no evidence either way, so our opinions on this are equally valid.

Originally Posted by bainsey

Therein lies the difference. I certainly would. Perhaps not a month or two later, but that night? Absolutely. I have a lot of respect those who choose to step it up.

"Step it up?" Really? Yeah, that's the difference. It's no more stepping it up than when I salute an officer. 50% of the time, I do it because I have to. 50% of the time I do it because I actually respect that officer. None of them will ever know the difference.

Personally, I have no more nor less respect for those that do as opposed to those that don't.

[26 Year Gap]

Originally Posted by stir22

interesting. how did that game go?

One basketball. One soccer. I always shook hands of opponents who fouled out. This one kid took exception to it. We won that game handily. The other was an Eastern Maine Soccer Championship, which we won 1-0 in OT. County rival. Always had close games. It was a well played game and this guy was next to me when the final horn went off. I was on a first name basis with a lot of his teammates. Found out their view of the kid and mine were not all that dissimilar.

[bainsey]

Originally Posted by Snaqwells

It's no more stepping it up than when I salute an officer. 50% of the time, I do it because I have to. 50% of the time I do it because I actually respect that officer. None of them will ever know the difference.

I think we're starting to see motivations here.

You have to salute an officer. (Thanks for your service, by the way. I salute you.) Coaches don't have to make their kids shake my hand. Therefore, I remember the teams that do. It may not always come from the heart (eye contact says a lot), but I remember the teams that "step it up."

[Adam]

Originally Posted by bainsey

I think we're starting to see motivations here.

You have to salute an officer. (Thanks for your service, by the way. I salute you.) Coaches don't have to make their kids shake my hand. Therefore, I remember the teams that do. It may not always come from the heart (eye contact says a lot), but I remember the teams that "step it up."

1. Not my point, but thank you.
2. We're going in circles now; I'm done.

[M&M Guy]

Originally Posted by Snaqwells

We're going in circles now; I'm done.

Don't windmills go in circles, too?

[justacoach]

Originally Posted by 26 Year Gap

How many here can remember even one handshake with an official as a player?

I shook J. Dallas Shirley's hand in Arlington, VA on Feb 13, 1966. Haven't washed it since

[26 Year Gap]

Originally Posted by justacoach

I shook J. Dallas Shirley's hand in Arlington, VA on Feb 13, 1966. Haven't washed it since

Sounds OO to me.

[biggravy]

I'm not a big fan of the "fist bump". Don't like shaking that many hands. Usually around here we give high fives. When in Rome... if both my partners do the "fist bump" I do to. I like the interaction. I won't delay the game but I try to pleasantly interact with coaches, players, and occasionally fans. A long time ago I was told I called a good game but was not really liked by some coaches because I seemed unapproachable. I don't like that and have tried to change it. We are looked at as "the bad guy" enough as it is. I want to seem serious, yet casual. I want to convey that this is after all just a game. I want to seem human. It has worked for me for a long time now.