Establishing confidence, confidence and respect from coaches and players

[Mark Padgett]

Originally Posted by Ref Ump Welsch

You know, I think I had this conversation with the very first coach who I T'd up, in my very first game as an official back when I was still in HS. Of course, a female coach from a Catholic school swearing at me in a game at a Lutheran school would have started a conversation in the gym regardless of who was having the conversation!

About six or seven years ago, I was working a boys HS rec tourney with a female official. After the first quarter, she told me she thought one of the coaches (a guy who looked about in his early 30s) was staring at her chest every time she got near him. She asked me to talk to him about it. I must admit, her request threw me a little. I thought about it and came up with this - before the quarter started, I went over to him and said (in a manner that gave the impression I was talking to him "guy to guy") something like, "Hey, you know my partner is a real looker, don't you think?" He gave me a dirty little smile and said, "Yeah, and she's got really nice t**s, too!"

I looked back at him very seriously and said, "Yeah, and if you don't stop staring at them, you're outta here. I'm serious." He looked shocked and eventually turned away. He didn't say anything or stare any more, however.

After the game, my partner asked me what I said to him. I told her that I said to him that even though she was an extremely attractive young lady, it wasn't professional to gaze at her during the game and that he agreed. She looked at me, smiled and said, "Yeah, right Padgett. I know you better than that."

Gee - I guess you could make a case that I "baited" him.