admitting to a coach you made a mistake

[mbyron]

Originally Posted by dsturdy5

He screamed at me, "that's a double dribble! How could you miss that? He can't do that!"

Next dead ball, a timeout was called, I reported it and went over to B's coach as the throw-in was near his bench. I turned to him and in a voice only he and I could hear, I admitted I blew it. He replied with, "I don't care. That was a HUGE call in a game like this." I turned and began the throw-in procedure.

For the next trip or two, while his team was trailing, he would say "that was a huge no call" as I ran past his bench. Next chance I got I told him (in the same calm, quiet voice) the play was a long time ago in the scheme of the game, it is a close game, his team is playing great, and he should focus on winning this game with his players rather than something he cannot control. If he did not, he would not be on the sideline to see the end result. That seemed to calm him down. Of course, team A's coach now thought every call that went against his team was a "make up call" but my partner felt his wrath and ended up dealing with him.

1. That was not a good time to admit a mistake, as you discovered.

2. You were right to tell the coach to stop. Maybe even late.

3. You said that he "should focus on winning this game" -- I try never to tell coaches what they should do. After all, I don't want them to tell me what to do.

4. You threatened the coach ("If he did not, he would not be on the sideline..."). Threatening paints you into a corner and makes you seem to be a bully. You told him to stop, and he knows the consequences of continuing. That's sufficient.

[dsturdy5]

Originally Posted by mbyron

1. That was not a good time to admit a mistake, as you discovered.

2. You were right to tell the coach to stop. Maybe even late.

3. You said that he "should focus on winning this game" -- I try never to tell coaches what they should do. After all, I don't want them to tell me what to do.

4. You threatened the coach ("If he did not, he would not be on the sideline..."). Threatening paints you into a corner and makes you seem to be a bully. You told him to stop, and he knows the consequences of continuing. That's sufficient.

Thanks for the feedback. I will file this away (as I do so much I read on this site).

I understand what you mean by "threatening" and putting myself into a tougher position. I have not given a ton of T's in my high school officiating career. Nor have I felt I have needed to upon reflection so I don't have a reputation or anything (that I'm aware of )

I think I was caught up in the fact that I knew I screwed up so obviously in front of a packed gym and continually heard it from the coach. Sort of a heat of the moment type of thing I guess.

[Mark Padgett]

Originally Posted by dsturdy5

I have not given a ton of T's in my high school officiating career.

Have you been out sick, or what?