Funny things you hear from coaches and your partners..........

[MCJB Ump]

Just after requesting a full time out.....

Coach: How can we have 14 fouls and they only have 4??

Me: Coach, tell your kids to quit fouling.

Coach: What???????????????????????

Me: Tell your kids to quit fouling.


Time out ends, team breaks the huddle with "1 2 3...........NO FOULS!!"

[whistleone]

Coach: "It sure is getting rough down low."
Official: "I know. I sure wouldn't want to be in there!"

[shave-tail]

Young official talking to my daughter, she is on defense:

Young Official: Don't reach.....Don't reach....tweet.....I told you not to reach.
Daughter: Reachin' ain't a foul, touchin' is a foul.
Young Official: Then smiles and reports the foul.

By the way she fouled.

[hoosierref]

Player: "But I did not hold or pull on his jersey!"

Me: "So that number in your hand just jumped off his uniform?"

[Mark Padgett]

Best one from a partner all season, and she is a HS senior working a rec game with me just last week:

Coach: (after a game in which only 5 fouls were called) "No fouls? We took a lot of elbows out there."

Partner: "Well you'd better give them back. We can't have kids going around without elbows!"

[Overnbach]

Someone here can probably tell me where this came from. As I recall the story, there was a foul called on A1 just seconds after the game started. Coach B said, "Thanks, he's been doing that all night!"

Still makes me chuckle, years after I first heard it.

[just another ref]

During the pregame conference I always say something about when the timeout request by the coach will be granted. "I have to see that it's you making the request or I have to be able to recognize your voice, at least." Early in the game, home coach bellowed out some little silly observation about a call. I gave him an inquiring look and he said, "Wanted to be sure you were able to recognize my voice."

[RefTip]

Working a youth game ( 4th grade ) and coach can hardly contain himself ( ready to explode) , acting like it is the NCAA championships :

Coach : " That's a travel , you HAVE to call that ! "
Me : " Coach you're right ... tweet " ( His player had the ball)

Didn't say anything the rest of the game.

[Mark Padgett]

Partner got off a brilliant one this morning in our 8th grade boys rec game.

Spectator: "WHERE'S THE FOUL??!!??"
Partner: "Apparently, only in your imagination."

The only thing that would have been more brilliant would have been if he would have continued, "You know, like your sex life."

[rainmaker]

Originally Posted by just another ref

During the pregame conference I always say something about when the timeout request by the coach will be granted. "I have to see that it's you making the request or I have to be able to recognize your voice, at least." Early in the game, home coach bellowed out some little silly observation about a call. I gave him an inquiring look and he said, "Wanted to be sure you were able to recognize my voice."

That's pretty canny!

[Coach Bill]

Had one this afternoon:

Coach Bill: How can you call three seconds right after he got his shot blocked?
Ref: His shot didn't hit the rim.

[Adam]

Originally Posted by Coach Bill

Had one this afternoon:

Coach Bill: How can you call three seconds right after he got his shot blocked?
Ref: His shot didn't hit the rim.

Ouch! Sorry, coach. That one hurts.

[Mark Padgett]

Originally Posted by rainmaker

That's pretty canny!

As canny as this?

[The Canuck]

Originally Posted by Camron Rust

This one is not mine...but it happened here in Portland:

Coach: "Ref, The foul count is 8-2!"
Ref: "Coach, your team has 2!! "
Coach: "<silence>"

Along the same lines (not mine but happened in a JC game)...

Fouls are 7-0 (NCAA rules) against the home team. Foul called on V1. V coach jumps up.

V COACH: Homered! I'm getting homered! I can't believe it!!
REF: (walks to bench) Coach, look at the scoreboard.
V COACH: What am I looking at?
REF: The fouls are 7 to 1 for...
V COACH: I know! I can't believe it's 7-1! Unbelievable!!
REF: Coach, your team has 1 foul, the foul we just called.
V COACH: ... well, don't I feel like an a**hole?
REF: Yeah you do. Now here's the thing: I have to give you a T for your homer comment.
V COACH: Oh darn it. What do we do?
REF: As I walk away, throw your hands in the air.
V COACH: You'd do that for me?
REF: Yes but only this one time.

Coach throws hands in the air, gets whacked. At halftime...

V COACH: Hey ref, nobody's ever done anything like that for me before. How can I pay you back?
REF: Sit down and don't say another word tonight.

He did as he was told (there's no seatbelt rule here).

[Brad]

Originally Posted by Coach Bill

Had one this afternoon:

Coach Bill: How can you call three seconds right after he got his shot blocked?
Ref: His shot didn't hit the rim.

What am I missing here? You can't have 3-seconds after a try -- shot blocked or not.