Put me out of my misery...

[Jurassic Referee]

Originally Posted by ILRef80

Assignors like the guy you mentioned have too much power, in my opinion.

It's not a matter of having the power. It's a matter of misusing the power.

[Bearfanmike20]

I still have yet to call a T in 35+ games now.

[Back In The Saddle]

Originally Posted by Bearfanmike20

I still have yet to call a T in 35+ games now.

Yeah? And...? So...? What are you trying to say? You've been lucky? Your game management skills are absolutely top-notch? You're a coach? You have rhino-thick skin? Or are you just stirring the pot?

[NM_Ref]

lol...want to hear something funny? My assignor...the one that gave me the lecture ended up throwing out the home coach. And talking to people at the game, they did it cause he "talked to much." I can't get enough of it...funny stuff...

[Bearfanmike20]

Originally Posted by Back In The Saddle

Yeah? And...? So...? What are you trying to say? You've been lucky? Your game management skills are absolutely top-notch? You're a coach? You have rhino-thick skin? Or are you just stirring the pot?

Probably any and all of the above...

Just havn't had the opportunity yet.. thats all.. nothing more.. nothing less.

[Rich]

Originally Posted by Bearfanmike20

I still have yet to call a T in 35+ games now.

Please don't turn into one of these guys who counts the days/games/years between technicals and uses that as a measure of officiating quality.

[lmeadski]

I am in my third year, ref a butt load of games a year, and have yet had to issue a T. And, our assignors are very laid back and exceptionally supportive of the refs (one still refs, the other is retired, some of you may know her: Barb Beckett). Anyway, my heart goes out to you guys. I look forward to all the games I ref, I enjoy almost all the coaches, and more than that, the players. Being a ref is great. I hope you all find yourself a similar sitch.

[Back In The Saddle]

Originally Posted by msavakinas

i agree with nm_ref...

As a young guy (6 months shy of 19...) with 3+ years of experience I catch a lot of crap by coaches I haven't had when I walk on to the floor. I should say they test me a lot and as I'm moving up the ladder I've noticed that. Hence the 6 T's in two weeks for me, and none before that this year, and I averaged about 2 or 3 a year my first two years. It's good that you got him I think and I'm sure the other coach took note. He tested you because he knew you were new and wanted to see how far he could push you... and you got him for it. I think that's what has happened to me the past two weeks. It's not a matter of the quantity of T's, but the quality? If that makes sense...

Hopefully it's not what you meant, but the way you said this makes it sound like this is some kind of tit-for-tat or one-up competition. Or worse, it kind of sounds like retaliation.

Yes, at each new level coaches will test you. They'll push you to see what they can get away with. I think the mark of maturity as a referee is that you quickly, confidently, and dispassionately show the coach where that line is. Yes, that may require giving him a technical foul. If it does, it should be delivered in as businesslike a manner as possible. It's not a matter of "getting him." It's a matter of addressing the unacceptable behavior.

My game tonight is kind of a case study in what I'm talking about. BJV rivalry game. H team coach has a reputation for being a ... rather unpleasant coach to work for, shall we say.

First time I worked for him 2 years ago, he got right under my skin. It was not a good experience. I left wishing I had T'd him.

A year later, I work for him again and this time I give him the T he deserved. I felt better about that experience, and even a little like I "got him."

Earlier this year I work for him again. He's as yappy as ever. But I decide to make him my project and see if I can work with him. I've nothing to lose; if I can't make it work I still have the T in my pocket. So when he hollers across the floor about me about a call he doesn't like, I come to him the first opportunity I have and we talk about the call. And I end with, "Coach, you know I can't have you yelling at me across the floor like that." He half smiles and shakes his head like, "yeah, I know." All game long I answer his questions, tell him what I saw. Things go pretty well.

Tonight he and his assistant are in usual form. Early in the first quarter, I go to him after his assistant has gotten too vocal and tell him, "Coach, you need to get your bench under control or it's going to cost you." He tells his assistant to zip it. And we have very little trouble with him (the HC) the rest of the night.

I think the progression is interesting. The first time out, he gets me. The second time, I get him. The third time, I try something new and it works. The most recent game, I show him where the boundaries are up front and everybody is happy (or as happy as you can expect). Now you could say that some of that developed with time and familiarity. But honestly I have worked very few games for him over the years. Mostly I think it's a matter of my increasing level of maturity as an official. Things got much better when I moved beyond the "get him" stage.

[Dan_ref]

Everybody has their trigger point for T's. I would never criticize another official for giving a T. I might for not giving a T. That said... maybe you work for a supervisor that would prefer not to have to deal with T's. At the most he should have spoken to you in private, not in front of fellow officials. To chase after the coach in public is the kind of weak @ss kissing behavior you probably don't need from an assignor. Find another league to work if you can.

Some believe that 'better' officials throw fewer T's and if you limit the number of T's you give you'll be a better official. To me, this is like saying better officials call fewer travels and if you want to be a better official just call fewer walks. Silly argument IMO.

[gordon30307]

Originally Posted by NM_Ref

This is a post from my blog...you can see the link in my sig, but I thought I'd post it here as well.

**********************************
It took 37 games to hit the brick wall. 37 games to have that one situation...that one realization...that maybe...just maybe...I shouldn't be here.

Do I really feel that way? After 4 or 5 hours of thinking, no. But at halftime of the 37th game, I felt that way. I was ready to walk out. I was SO angry.

I did two games tonight, girls C/JV. I'll post more about that in another post.

2nd quarter of JV game. I'm lead in front of B's bench. I blow my whistle and signal foul. As I'm walking towards the table, I hear the the players on B's bench chirping. They are saying things like "That wasn't a foul!" "Come on ref." And things like that. No big deal. I go to the coach and say, "Coach, please warn your players about arguing and questioning all calls from the bench," and continue on to report my foul. Coach takes a couple steps and in a very sarcastic tone says, "Well then you need to call right."

I issue a technical to the coach. I gave him a very legitimate warning to give to his players and responded with a sarcastic remark. I wasn't going to take that. Partner give the coach the seatbelt and I move away from it all.

About 10 seconds into the second half, I'm lead again. This time in front of A's bench. I blow my whistle again to signal a foul. I look up at the clock furthest away from me to make sure it's stopped. As I glance over I notice the B's coach up off the bench about 5 feet away from his chair onto the court. As I'm going to report, I tell coach, "You need to remain seated." He sticks his hand out, giving me the stop sign and continues talking to his players. I need to point out that he was NOT reacting a play and was out on the floor COACHING his players. I give him his second T and tell him he has been ejected.

After I report all the fouls I stand in front of the table waiting for the coach to leave. What I didn't mention is that 3 veteran officails (one of which is our regional assignor) are sitting in the stands behind B's bench waiting for their Varsity game. They were sitting about 5 rows up...which is pretty far behind the bench. I notice that as the coach leaves, our regional assignor gets up and follows him out. I was pissed from that point.

We finish the half without incident and head to the locker room. I go in and sit down and begin discussing what we need to work on with my partner in the second half when he walks in. He makes a beeline towards me and starts talking.

He wants to know what the coach said to warrant the first T. I told him and he says, "No. Thats no what he said." I asked him how he knew that and he said that he was sitting behind the bench an heard. I lost it. I replied, "Thats bulls$%^, there is no way you could have heard him from way up there." I told him about the tone the coach said it in and the inflection. He told me that I need to lend an ear when a coach needs to vent. I agreed, but not in this situation. I told him that I gave the coach a legitimate warning to his bench and he responded with sarcasm so I wouldn't "lend an ear" to that. The other "veteran" even told me that in his opinion I was "glorifying" myself with my whistle. This coming from a guy that told of a story of him T'ing a coach when the coach raised his hands in the air questioning a call. "Take control of the game," he said. Yeah right.

He then told me that the second Technical was also unwarranted because I let the Home coach on the court also. He was right. I don't have a problem with a coach walking onto the court a foot or two to talk to their players...as long as they are out of the way. I know of a few refs...including the man giving me the lecture, and I told him that. I also told him that before the Technical, I was letting the Visiting coach have the same leeway as the Home coach.

I then told him that I wanted to know what he told the coach. I was very upset and lost my cool. I told him that if he told the coach the same things he told me that he sold me out and I wouldn't stand for that. He told me he just went to the coach so that he could vent...nothing more. I don't really have a choice but to believe him...so I left it at that.

I was livid...I was angry...I wanted to walk out right there. I felt thrown under the bus. I didn't feel that I was being helped in this situation. I just felt as if I was being signaled out...in front of my partner and the other referees for my actions. It made me wonder if I really wanted to continue doing what I love to do.

But I'm better than that. I know I lost it and after my game I apologized for losing it like that but still re-iterated that I felt I was justified in EVERY ASPECT of the situation.

Now it's time to write up the game report.
******************************

When the Coach is standing after I issue the Tee I would ask my partner to remind him he needs to sit. Perhaps the second tee and ejection MAY have been avoided if you handled it this way. Generaaly speaking you should avoid if possible issuing the second tee. However if warranted by all means tee and eject.

Concerning your assignor rather than getting in a p**sing contest ask him how he would have handled it. You don't have to agree with him but perhaps you might pick up something you can use.

Good Luck

[Jurassic Referee]

Originally Posted by gordon30307

When the Coach is standing after I issue the Tee I would ask my partner to remind him he needs to sit. Perhaps the second tee and ejection MAY have been avoided if you handled it this way.

If you re-read his post, Gordon, he stated "Partner gave the coach the seatbelt...."

[gordon30307]

Originally Posted by Jurassic Referee

If you re-read his post, Gordon, he stated "Partner gave the coach the seatbelt...."

Than you gotta do what you gotta do.

[Junker]

I'm not going to comment on the T situations, I wasn't there, I didn't see. What I am going to comment on is your discussion with the assignor. You have to realize, for better or worse, this is a person higher up the food chain than you. As with going to camps, you don't want to get the reputation of someone that doesn't listen to get better. I don't agree with how your assignor handled the situation, but you don't want to go burning bridges in your first year. I'd reccomend finding a time to sit down and replay the situation with your assignor and listen to their take on how it could have been handled. If you do this, don't be the "yes, but" guy.