T or let it ride?

[Mark Padgett]

Originally Posted by M&M Guy

I'm sure he meant everyone on this forum.

Hey - I resemble that remark!

[tomegun]

I went back to look at Juulie's "Thank you" post. This is how I read it and I'm saying this without inserting a whole bunch of my personal feelings into it. Too much bickering for a Sunday night - a Sunday night away from home for me (the older I get the more I want to say home. Is there a phobia for that?).

Originally Posted by rainmaker

Another response I use a lot when a coach is nagging is a very dispassionate "Thank you".

I'm understanding this as a somewhat dry response. I find nothing wrong with that.

Originally Posted by rainmaker

If the coach asks a direct question, use a standard response.

OK, do you mean standard response or appropriate response? I read that as one response regardless of the question. Here is where I would give an answer to that specific question - my answer to the next question may or may not be the same depending on the question. Also, remember that we cannot continue to give the coach the same answer all night because they don't expect the same situations they are questioning to continue all night. Sort of like admitting to a coach you kicked one. He/she may accept it the first time, but you can't keep kicking them all night.

Originally Posted by rainmaker

Otherwise say, "Thank you" and nod. This means, "I heard you". And that's all it means. "She's moving!!" "Thank you" "That's a foul!!" "Thank you" "They're all over us!!" "Thank you". You are acknowledging that the coach exists and that he's concerned about what's happening, and that's all. It really, really helps.

Again, these are responses to comments which I feel unnecessary. Especially doing two-man, which I assume some newer officials still do largely, there just isn't time for officials to continually listen to and respond to coaches. It becomes a problem and then you must go down a different path.
So if I were to answer these comments. If the same coach continually says things like this all game, it will get old fast. I cannot say what my response would be for sure because it would be a dynamic situation. However, "Thank you" doesn't come to mind.
One of my good friends works in the Pac-10, WAC and Mountain West. When I first got to Las Vegas he was still working high school because there just isn't a lot of ball to work in and around Vegas. He is a natural at communicating with coaches and not because he knows all the "witty" comebacks (I always wonder why people want to hear this and find it strange when they say they might use what someone else said). His communication is natural. It isn't always up and it isn't always down, it is appropriate for whatever the situation needs. He can go from telling a player he is from the hood too in a colorful manner to laughing and joking with Lute Olson. The cherry on top of all this is the fact that being in games with a coach over and over helps. That familiarity makes the communication easier for both the coach and the official.

I hope what I said makes sense without being aimed at anyone in particular. If it doesn't make sense, I'm away from home - which means I'm uncomfortable - I'm getting tired and I have been on this computer too long doing some research for other things.

[Dan_ref]

Nice little pissing contest thread you guys got going. My take:

- an 8th grade coach asks me if I'm going to ever call a foul on his opponents as I'm putting the ball in he had better be smiling. If not I'm going to take a brief time out to ask him to explain if he's accussing me of cheating. What happens next is up to him. If we're dealing with players somewhat older than 12 years old I'll remind him the half has just started and so far we're pretty even (subtle way of pointing to the scoreboad). Or I might just ignore him or even thank him kindly for his input.

- seems to be just a bit too much concern about what these coaches happen to think about you. Work your game and let the coaches think what they want.

- I hear ya coach, I'll watch for it coach, thank you coach, you must be joking coach, that's enough coach...they all work, as does silence. The idea is the same - deal with some question or comment addressed to you and move on.

[rainmaker]

Originally Posted by tomegun

- a Sunday night away from home for me (the older I get the more I want to say home. Is there a phobia for that?).

Agoraphobia?

Originally Posted by tomegun

OK, do you mean standard response or appropriate response? I read that as one response regardless of the question. Here is where I would give an answer to that specific question - my answer to the next question may or may not be the same depending on the question.

Appropriate response. Such as "Wasn't that a foul?" "No contact". Or "Why wasn't that a charge?" "Your player didn't have LGP"

Originally Posted by tomegun

Also, remember that we cannot continue to give the coach the same answer all night because they don't expect the same situations they are questioning to continue all night. Sort of like admitting to a coach you kicked one. He/she may accept it the first time, but you can't keep kicking them all night.

RIght.

Originally Posted by tomegun

Again, these are responses to comments which I feel unnecessary. Especially doing two-man, which I assume some newer officials still do largely, there just isn't time for officials to continually listen to and respond to coaches. It becomes a problem and then you must go down a different path.

Right. I don't respond to everything. But if a coach is in my ear, complaining about something specific, sometimes "Thank you" helps them feel that I'm not just brushing them off.

Originally Posted by tomegun

So if I were to answer these comments. If the same coach continually says things like this all game, it will get old fast. I cannot say what my response would be for sure because it would be a dynamic situation. However, "Thank you" doesn't come to mind.

Well, right. And I don't use it int hat situation.

Originally Posted by tomegun

That familiarity makes the communication easier for both the coach and the official.

Absolutely. That's the best situation of all.

Originally Posted by tomegun

I hope what I said makes sense without being aimed at anyone in particular.

It's good. Real discussion about real situations.

Originally Posted by tomegun

If it doesn't make sense, I'm away from home - which means I'm uncomfortable - I'm getting tired and I have been on this computer too long doing some research for other things.

You mean, you have a life? Cool!

[M&M Guy]

Originally Posted by Dan_ref

Nice little pissing contest thread you guys got going.

Thanks for joining the rest of us Cretins.

Btw, I agree with you. Care to reconsider?

[rainmaker]

Originally Posted by Dan_ref

Nice little pissing contest thread you guys got going.

Actually, it's been bz that's done all the pissing. I've just been trying to keep my leg out of reach!

[JRutledge]

Originally Posted by Dan_ref

- seems to be just a bit too much concern about what these coaches happen to think about you. Work your game and let the coaches think what they want.

I agree with this statement the most.

Peace

[blindzebra]

Originally Posted by rainmaker

Actually, it's been bz that's done all the pissing. I've just been trying to keep my leg out of reach!

I said I didn't like it and gave a very good reason why. Others agreed completely with my reasoning. You replied with a smart azz :shrug: to me, a whatever to another poster and I'm the one with the pissing contest....freaking unbelievable.

[rainmaker]

Originally Posted by blindzebra

I said I didn't like it and gave a very good reason why. Others agreed completely with my reasoning. You replied with a smart azz :shrug: to me, a whatever to another poster and I'm the one with the pissing contest....freaking unbelievable.

Yea, you're not the first one to think that about me!

[rockyroad]

Originally Posted by blindzebra

I said I didn't like it and gave a very good reason why. Others agreed completely with my reasoning. You replied with a smart azz :shrug: to me, a whatever to another poster and I'm the one with the pissing contest....freaking unbelievable.

What's freaking unbelievable is that you got this worked up over someone using a phrase that you then told everyone else to never use...that's ridiculous.

[Adam]

Originally Posted by Jurassic Referee

What do you mean "us"?

Sorry, I didn't mean to insert myself into your little exclusive club.

[blindzebra]

Originally Posted by rockyroad

What's freaking unbelievable is that you got this worked up over someone using a phrase that you then told everyone else to never use...that's ridiculous.

No what is unbelievable is your comprehension skills.

She gave explicit examples of when she uses it...examples where the phrase thank you makes no sense. No more contextual sense than saying pass the salt. So there's the WTF factor.

Now we all know about sarcasm, this forum wouldn't be the same without it...an out of place thank you is bound to rub some the wrong way and a dry one can just as easily be taken as wrong as a thaaaaaannnnnkkkkk yooooooooouuu! Complete with a

How ironic that Rainmaker talks about having this as a tool in her kit, when we constantly warn against being a plumber. A mis-applied thank you is a snake IMO.

[rockyroad]

Originally Posted by blindzebra

No what is unbelievable is your comprehension skills.

.

Just to be clear, you should either use the word "are" or drop the "s" at the end of skills. "Is" implies singular as in skill, but are would go with skills (plural). So my comprehension skills are fine...you got your underwear all in a bind because someone said something that worked for them and you then told them it doesn't work...whatever.

[Dan_ref]

[blindzebra]

Originally Posted by rockyroad

Just to be clear, you should either use the word "are" or drop the "s" at the end of skills. "Is" implies singular as in skill, but are would go with skills (plural). So my comprehension skills are fine...you got your underwear all in a bind because someone said something that worked for them and you then told them it doesn't work...whatever.

Do you read and understand or do you just check for grammar?

Working for her or not isn't the issue, the chance it will blow up in someone else's face is the issue.

It doesn't make sense...frankly it's stupid...to reply with thank you when the comment doesn't call for it, confusing a coach into being quiet isn't good game management. Pissing them off when they think you are being a prick is even worse.