Stupid announcer tricks, part 2868

[mikesears]

Originally posted by Gary Brendemuehl
Q: What do you call a lawyer buried up to his neck in sand?

A: Not enough sand.

I'd call this a good start, too!


Q: What do you call a hundred lawyers chained together at the bottom of the ocean?

A: A good start. [/B][/QUOTE]


MORE:


Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
A: His lips are moving.

Q: What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?
A: There are skid marks in front of the dog.

Q: Why won't sharks attack lawyers?
A: Professional courtesy.

Q: How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?
A: Cut the rope.

Q: Do you know how to save a drowning laywer?
A1: Take your foot off his head.
A2: No?? Good!

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of dung?
A: The bucket.

Q: What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?
A: When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.

Q: What is the definition of a "crying shame"?
A: There was an empty seat.

Q: What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?
A: An offer you can't understand

Q. Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?
A. From chasing parked ambulances.

Q. Where can you find a good lawyer?
A. In the cemetary

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?
A. A vampire only sucks blood at night.

Q. How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Heck, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.

Q: If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?
A: It might be your bicycle.

Originally posted by mikesears

I'd call this a good start, too!


Q: What do you call a hundred lawyers chained together at the bottom of the ocean?

A: A good start.

[/B][/QUOTE]

Mike, you sound alittle bitter, or are you over that now? I used to feel the same way about lawyers right after my divorce!

How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?
She has an uncontrollable craving for baloney.

How does an attorney sleep?
First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.

[mikesears]

Mike, you sound alittle bitter, or are you over that now? I used to feel the same way about lawyers right after my divorce!

I'm not bitter. I just hate all those conniving sons-of-guns. Particularly the one who ....

Honestly, I just like jokes. Lawyer jokes, blonde jokes, etc.

BTW, I'm looking for some good referee jokes.