Deferring to parnter vs the rookie treatment

[Indy_Ref]

Originally posted by stick
In your situation once he started his officiating 101 editorial I would have interrupted him in a polite way by saying, "With all due respect we really need to go over how we're going to call over the back, who's going to toss the jump ball", etc, etc. I would have taken over the conversation, sort of like diffusing him, but in a polite, respectful way. Then I would have gone out and worked my a$$ off calling the best game I can and HUSTLE. If he's a 20 year official, worked 10 state playoffs, etc etc, he knows your qualified to work. I suspect he may have been testing you out and even though you did nothing wrong during the game, it sounds like you gave in somewhat during pre-game. Gotta nip it in the butt right away because if you give some people an inch, they'll take a mile!!
I also would have told the coaches in the room in a polite way that "since (Bill & I) have never worked together we have to go over our routine and get ready so we can call the game correctly. If you would be so kind as to give us a few minutes I'd really appreciate it. Thank you". Your partner may not like being upstaged like that but he'll learn to respect you and if he's a 20+ year guy he'll tell other refs to respect you too. If your partner wants to go over how he's going to call certain situations with coaches let'em go to the bar and they talk all they want.
jmho

Excellent advice, Stick!! I'm mostly with you! I had a similar situation last year in my boys' tournament. It was my 3rd tournament, and I was with a former mentor (if you can believe that!) He hung me out a few times on the court...and we had words after the game. Right after our exchange, a site observer came in and reemed him for what he did to me. I kind of felt justified...but I still didn't like what happened. We are supposed to be a team out there!