Book Suggestions (a little OT...)
 

Three interesting books related to player-coach interaction:

<a href="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0736033270/qid=1073316973//ref=sr_8_xs_ap_i0_xgl14/002-8467031-4715251?v=glance&s=books&n=507846">Creative Coaching</a> - A book for coaches that specifically focuses on interaction with players and team-building. The author uses a number of prestigious top-level coaches as examples of various principles.

<a href="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0671688774/qid=1073317121//ref=sr_8_xs_ap_i0_xgl14/002-8467031-4715251?v=glance&s=books&n=507846">Season on the Brink</a> - This always strikes me as more of a story about a player-coach relationship than one about an IU basketball season. Reading it leaves plenty of room for discussion about the impact of Coach Knight's style of interaction with his team and his key player. The ongoing saga of their relationship adds to the mystique a bit, too. One thing I like about the book is that both sides of the "pro-" and "anti-" Bob Knight debate like to point to the book for evidence to support their views.

<a href="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0385511612/qid=1073317213//ref=sr_8_xs_ap_i0_xgl14/002-8467031-4715251?v=glance&s=books&n=507846">Bleachers</a> - A fairly recent John Grisham novel that has its main characters looking back at their relationship with their sometimes-abusive former football coach. Personally, I liked this effort better than Grisham's trademark lawyer stories. It's a very quick read.

And finally an interesting web site: http://www.positivecoach.org/
This group is devoted to positive coaching principles in all levels of competition. Their teaching motto is "Honor the Game." I like a lot of their ideals even if I don't always live up to them as a coach.

I'm more of a coach than an official. As my coaching responsibilities have increased, my officiating has decreased (to the point where I barely officiate any more). While there are certainly exceptions, many coaches fail to appreciate what it takes to be a great official, and many officials are quick to expect the worst from coaches.

A note to the (apparent) player who started this thread: At the risk of appearing to "coddle," I will say that I like my players to approach me directly and privately when they are frustrated. I don't call my players "stupid," but I sometimes say things that I regret. It's impossible to tell much from your message, but I want my players to use the same skills in personal interaction as we teach on the court. These include decisive action, proactive decision making, courage, and the ability to use your emotions without being controlled by them. I would consider talking to your coach privately. Good luck in your season and the rest of your playing days.

Joe T

Nice response, good info.

That's okay, Coach.
 

From time to time, coach coddling creates communication.
mick

[/B][/QUOTE]

Dan,
Yeah, I know. Yer right.
I used to be a parent.
I think we went with something like "break the will and but never the spirit".
Maybe it was because of the way I was coached. :)
mick [/B][/QUOTE]

Mick,

How does one know when they've crossed that line (of breaking the spirit)or is even approaching it too closely?

Also, aren't you once a parent always a parent?;)

Re: Book Suggestions (a little OT...)
 

Last Amateurs, The: Playing for Glory and Honor in Division 1 College Basketball

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg...glance&s=books

Yet another great book, but rather than focussing in on the world of Bob Knight & big time basketball it looks at a season in the Patriot league. No scholarships until recently and athletes expected to excel at academics.

It's clear that those coaches respect their kids.



Except for the occasional "HEY! That's an illegal screen!" I imagine. ;)

Oh. Never mind. :D

davidw,

Crossing over:
It can be easy to slip or trip on that line.
Sometimes you must cross over to help your partner, and clean up a mess that loud and irate participants are creating. Try not to stay there, out of position, longer than necessary.

Always a parent:
There comes a time when that which seems apparent is no long apparent to them. Perhaps, then, we may become trans-parent. We should take care to maintain our presence, eventhough the rules may have been amended.

mick

Wow! Took me a reading or two to get all that mick, but I think I got it. Back to the stuff that really matters to us. And I'm still chuckling at it. Thanks.

But!! Crossing over is not necessarily 'out of position'.:D

davidw,
I've had over 33 years with one partner, 29 with another, and 25 with another.
They are all good participants, but their postions vary and your partner may be one... or another. You maybe going a two-, three- or (Oh, my, I dislike this!) solo.
Trust me ! It is way to easy to find yourself out of position.
mick

[ [/B][/QUOTE]
davidw,
I've had over 33 years with one partner, 29 with another, and 25 with another.
They are all good participants, but their postions vary and your partner may be one... or another. You maybe going a two-, three- or (Oh, my, I dislike this!) solo.
Trust me ! It is way to easy to find yourself out of position.
mick
[/B][/QUOTE]

Mick,

If I have crossed over, it was because I felt I was going for better position (obviously)but, If on arriving there I find I am not, then--you are right-- I'm not hanging around long. Cause now I've discovered I am out of position.

By the way, how did we get here from the beginning of this post?

I'm just now editing this because I just now realized how really SLOW I was on your post mick. Yikes!:eek: Let's see, 33yrs+29years+25yrs. that's gotta make you how old?! And most certainly it sounds like an expert on "positions"

and by the way, 'stoopid' or not you're entitled to your opinion.:cool:

[Edited by davidw on Jan 5th, 2004 at 03:19 PM]

I think... because I said something stoopid.
<HR>
"Ya think I'm bad tonight? Shoulda seen my last game" - someone here

see edit above. Also, in addition to stoopid we could probably apply a few other choice adjectives!:rolleyes:

If the player thinks the language is offensive or abusive then it IS. Perception is reality. This obviously affects the enthusiasm, performance of the player, and the willinglyness to accept what the the coach is showing the team.

Talk to your parents and have them check with other parents as to their perception. Then meet with the AD or coach.

Being on a team should be fun, win or lose.

He might be exposed.
 

His preception might not be everyone's reality. He might be just like what Mick said, a whiner. And this could backfire on him, because the other players might give their preception of him. ;)

Peace

Re: He might be exposed.
 

Sure i agree, a lot of players like being yelled at and called stupid. :)

I am getting the opportunity to watch a lot of ball this winter because my AAU girls are HS freshmen now - no coaching til March! I see a lot of different styles. I take notes (mainly mental - hope I don't lose my mind).

I was much more of the screamer/berater category 5-6 years ago. I still lose it sometimes (I hate stupidity and laziness - sue me!). But I have dramatically altered my coaching style over the years. As I watch the various HS teams my players are on, I see coaches who scream and coaches who let their players play. The two most egregious screamers have players who don't make their own decisions well, they are looking to the bench for direction, they miss obvious scoring opportunities, they look tense and afraid to screw up, they play a robotic mechanical style, etc. I can't stand to watch it.

I have yet to see a coach that was a hard-core screamer that has had a positive impact on their team as a result of how they coach. I see plenty who don't scream that have some teams playing some pretty fluid ball.

One of my parents has a kid on a screamer's team and thought the screaming was a positive. He wanted me to consider being more in that style to toughen our girls up. So I watched half a game sitting next to him and shared my observations of what was happening on the floor. The team they played against thoroughly trounced them, the coach of that team simply coached, and there was no question that they were tough. The screamer's team was looking over their shoulders at the bench instead of seeing what was happening to them on the floor.

I did explain that every coach has their own style and you can only judge at the end of a season, or several seasons, who is and is not successful with their style ( I didn't bother to point out that the screamer's team has yet to go to the state finals, despite having some talented teams te past couple of years :) ). I also made clear to him that regardless of what he thinks of anybody's coaching style, he needs to support the team to his kid as long as she is on it. But he now understands my coaching philosophy a little better.