What do YOU do?

[#olderthanilook]

Originally Posted by Terrapins Fan

Do coaches in your area yell and scream at you, telling you about how many fouls you have missed and how you're missing walks and illegal screens? Do you call technical fouls for unsportsmanlike conduct when a coach does that?

A few do. I don't tolerate it. My first technical foul to a coach this season was for that very reason. He's giving the "illegal use of hands" mechanic and screaming "THAT'S A FOUL. CALL THE FOUL!!!!" (in my ear) at my partner all the way across the floor at the C as we transitioned up the floor.

whistle....stick....report....moved away...FTs

Much much smoother game after he got the invisible seat belt.

[RedAndWhiteRef]

In sub-varsity, I take absolutely nothing and I make sure my partners don't either. These kids are 13, 14, 15 years old, no one's scholarship is on the line, and yet you still have those JV coaches who think they're Bobby Knight and think they can behave like that because they're wearing a polo with the school's logo on it and holding a clipboard. Had a coach in a JV game last night yell out "TRAVEL" in the first quarter. I wanted to warn him, but my partner got there first.

In varsity, the coaches are generally a lot more knowledgeable about the rules and the game, so their questions are often more valid and they get more leeway.

I actually had a game a couple weeks ago where I knew one of the coaches was going to be a problem. She always is. On the drive there I told myself I wasn't driving an hour each way to take shit from someone half my height and twice my age. The first toe she put out of line, she got warned.

For some background, I'm only 25 and by far the youngest official in our area who gets varsity assignments. I have to be a little bit more of a dick to gain respect.

[Matt S.]

Originally Posted by RedAndWhiteRef

For some background, I'm only 25 and by far the youngest official in our area who gets varsity assignments. I have to be a little bit more of a dick to gain respect.

I couldn't disagree with this statement more. What you - and several others - fail to recognize is that we are in the customer service business. I am not suggesting that we bend over and let coaches/players verbally abuse us, but it's our interpersonal skills that get us ahead.

Be the bigger person. DE-escalate the situation. Use the tools at your disposal (informal and formal warnings). If it's personal, it's a T. If it's public, it's a T.

But 'being a dick' is not going to get you any respect. From coaches...or from partners.

[JRutledge]

Originally Posted by Matt S.

I couldn't disagree with this statement more. What you - and several others - fail to recognize is that we are in the customer service business. I am not suggesting that we bend over and let coaches/players verbally abuse us, but it's our interpersonal skills that get us ahead.

Be the bigger person. DE-escalate the situation. Use the tools at your disposal (informal and formal warnings). If it's personal, it's a T. If it's public, it's a T.

But 'being a dick' is not going to get you any respect. From coaches...or from partners.

So coaches are not in the people business? Because you can yell and scream at your youth players, does not give you the license to be disrespectful to me as a grown ass man because you do not like a call. I have a right to be talked to a certain way. I have enough sense to know that if I talk to a judge a certain way there are consequences. I know that if I talk to a police officer a certain way I will have to deal with those consequences. You do not want an official to be a dick, then be respectful to that person doing their job. We are not fighting coaches, we are giving them a penalty that if we follow the rules we can use much more for any questioning of our judgment. Clearly, we do not penalize coaches to that extent.

Peace

[Matt S.]

Jeff, I wholeheartedly agree with you. The comment that I quoted came from an individual that stated his age - which tells me he's been working varsity ball for at most, 7 years.

All I was trying to say is that a little maturity goes a long way - and that goes both ways, without a doubt.

[SD Referee]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

So coaches are not in the people business? Because you can yell and scream at your youth players, does not give you the license to be disrespectful to me as a grown ass man because you do not like a call. I have a right to be talked to a certain way. I have enough sense to know that if I talk to a judge a certain way there are consequences. I know that if I talk to a police officer a certain way I will have to deal with those consequences. You do not want an official to be a dick, then be respectful to that person doing their job. We are not fighting coaches, we are giving them a penalty that if we follow the rules we can use much more for any questioning of our judgment. Clearly, we do not penalize coaches to that extent.

Peace

So you are supporting this guy being a dick?

There is being a dick and there is being a good official that can deal with things while not being a dick. Two very different methods in my opinion.

I do not agree that giving Ts and warnings makes you a dick. That's handling business. Since this guy said he needs to act like a dick to get respect, that tells me a lot about the guy's ego and officiating ability.

[Raymond]

Originally Posted by Matt S.

...

But 'being a dick' is not going to get you any respect. From coaches...or from partners.

Sometimes it does. Or sometimes it gets the coach to stop talking to you, which isn't a bad thing.

If the coach is someone who is always a d!ck every game, then at some point diplomacy turns to "treat them as they treat you".

[SD Referee]

Originally Posted by Matt S.

I couldn't disagree with this statement more. What you - and several others - fail to recognize is that we are in the customer service business. I am not suggesting that we bend over and let coaches/players verbally abuse us, but it's our interpersonal skills that get us ahead.

Be the bigger person. DE-escalate the situation. Use the tools at your disposal (informal and formal warnings). If it's personal, it's a T. If it's public, it's a T.

But 'being a dick' is not going to get you any respect. From coaches...or from partners.

Spot on! Some guys have "little man" disease and some love the implied power and authority that officiating gets them.

What I've learned from this website is that while we are a fraternity, how things are done, handled, assigned, dealt with, etc. etc. varies so much across our country.

In my area, being a "dick" will get you fewer and fewer games and LESS respect from everybody.

[SD Referee]

Originally Posted by RedAndWhiteRef

In sub-varsity, I take absolutely nothing and I make sure my partners don't either. These kids are 13, 14, 15 years old, no one's scholarship is on the line, and yet you still have those JV coaches who think they're Bobby Knight and think they can behave like that because they're wearing a polo with the school's logo on it and holding a clipboard. Had a coach in a JV game last night yell out "TRAVEL" in the first quarter. I wanted to warn him, but my partner got there first.

In varsity, the coaches are generally a lot more knowledgeable about the rules and the game, so their questions are often more valid and they get more leeway.

I actually had a game a couple weeks ago where I knew one of the coaches was going to be a problem. She always is. On the drive there I told myself I wasn't driving an hour each way to take shit from someone half my height and twice my age. The first toe she put out of line, she got warned.

For some background, I'm only 25 and by far the youngest official in our area who gets varsity assignments. I have to be a little bit more of a dick to gain respect.

Settle down!

Giving warnings for coaches yelling "travel"? Wow!!!!!!!

I don't know any fellow officials that gain respect by being a dick. I would guess they are laughing at you and your over the top authority behind your back. I don't know how your assignor feels, but they might start to get tired of your act as well. Maybe you have a shortage of officials in your area and they are forced to hire you and put up with you being a dick?

[ChuckS]

Originally Posted by RedAndWhiteRef

On the drive there I told myself I wasn't driving an hour each way to take shit from someone half my height and twice my age. The first toe she put out of line, she got warned.

If you continue to carry biases such as these, it will not serve you well.

[SC Official]

Originally Posted by ChuckS

If you continue to carry biases such as these, it will not serve you well.

Part of my pregame discussions always include what to expect with regard to the coaches' behavior and how we are going to deal with it. Coaches who repeatedly act like jackasses aren't going to get any benefit of the doubt from me.